More Terrible Back Stories

[Matildathecat]

This is the support thread for all sufferers of back pain. Acute, chronic, agony or niggles, we are strictly non competitive. All newcomers very welcome. (Though be warned, the language can be a little 'ripe' ).

Here are our previous threads:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1871592-The-Back-Story
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1992406-The-Back-Story-Continues

My story long and grim but basically had failed surgery for disc prolapse, then further failed surgery to attempt to salvage the situation. I have nerve root damage and severe scarring around the nerve at L5 which won't get better. I'm 48, can't work, take a lot of drugs and have a blue badge. Currently battling several different agencies for ill health retirement and other benefits.

But I'm ok, having some fun despite the pain and have made some lovely friends on here.

So come and join us for moans, advice, downright rants or just a laugh.

matilda when is The Day? Definitely take drugs and talk too much

might oh welcome to the world of competitive pain - the number of times I get 'oh pavlov I had backache at the weekend, i now soooo get what you have been going through' or, 'i know how you feel, I overdid it in the garden once' or some other inane stuff, which is really that they are trying to empathise with their own experiences as they actually have no clue and know they don't and cannot comprehend. Even my neurosurgeon said something similar to that. He told me that he really does understand what back pain is like due to a disc prolapse, as once when he was training he was staying with her sister while she was struggling due to a prolapsed disc and had to have surgery. So he knows. I was like [shock[ but surely you must know anyway?!?! and then it dawned on me that even doctors, consultants in particular, they don't have any clue what pain is really like. I stupidly thought that because they were doctors they would know. That was a lightbbulb moment for me. he is, in effect a bloke with a knife/drill who as steady hands and a good eye.

chicken where are you? If not town, then general location of the world - UK? Which area of UK? How is your little one? Things that are fab for helping are, as mentioned to maizie, cbeebies, sticker books, bribery when you need to rest. For now, just enjoy our rambling, ask anything you want when you feel ready, or just come along with virtual whenever you fancy.

and yes yes to certain negative impacts of our relationships. It's something I need to work harder on these days and it's sometimes hard to convince DH it is absolutely no reflection on him, on us.

Hugs to you, chickens.
I can't take much in either. It's become part of my 'charm' on here. Hence responding to one thing at a time and poly-posting (like that term, girls?)
It's all part of it: shock, drugs, pain, feeling low, overwhelmed. Any one of those will do it (for me, anyway). I've had all - sometimes all at once. Just dump it on here n it might start to lift a bit. At the very least, you'll feel less alone!

I am So. Fucking Tired. All The Time. I have nighttime/sleepy tears in the day times sometimes at the moment. I am Done by this time of the evening. I am pooped. I guess it's a combination of mildly disturbed nights by DS, not sleeping greatly anyway, and constant low level (and not so low level as the day wears on) pain wearing me out. I am taking tramadol and codeine but sporadically, trying to avoid at night as I am screwed for sleep if I do. So, it's not really the meds I don't think. I am not taking nortriptyline, or diazepam. The last time I felt this fatigue that made me have sleepy tears in the day time was when DS woke for several hours every night, followed by starting his day at 5am (sometimes earlier…). So actually hi coming into our bed in the night and going to sleep is reasonable

I won't ask if anyone else is dog tired as I know it's a common thing, but wow it's flooring me now. by 5pm I was waiting for the children to go to bed so I could crash. DH and I were going to watch some of the Orange is the New Black but he took one look at me after tucking DD in, and said 'ok, bed for you, you ain't watching nothing!'

I have been swimming though. OK. not actually swimming. Plodding in the water with the children and DH. It hurt. Although I do actually feel a little looser around the muscles, which feels nice, the back pain is still there and so is the leg pain. Toes went numb after 10 mins in the pool, in particular sitting on the floor of the baby pool and then sort of floating on my back. So the toe numbness, and the more relaxed muscles but no reduction in pain means I know for sure it's not muscular (not on it's own, probably some muscular stuff too.

chicken totally agree with might just let it all out here, how you are feeling. If we can't sort it, will bring cake.

matilda I meant to say earlier. I love those boots you bought. I think we should probably twitter this link for Fly or something, just so we get some credit for how much we spend with them!

No idea about Twitter but was thinking of contacting them to alert them to our devoted ness. Twitter sounds good. We could offer our services as testers. Very fussy testers.

Yes. Pain is fucking exhausting. I've done so little yet consider it a busy day.

My appointment is tomorrow. Any queries or comments around disability benefits and ATOS welcome.

Off go bed now.sorry to miss the night shift...xx

Aaaaargh. I've missed you, Matilda.

I ventured onto old topic post groups.
BIG mistake.
HUGE!
What IS it with some people?
Some appear only it want to be obstructive, rude and unhelpful. But such is life. That'll teach me to feel 'normal' and roam.

Pavlov. I know those day-tired-desperation tears.
Sleep deprivation IS a form of torture. It does make me emotional and get me down.
Any chance of u getting some test tonight and tomorrow? Sometimes a catch up or restful day (after your swim n weekend?) helps. Even by going at a slower-than-usual pace.

What's all this Fly business, then? I used to love MBTs (still do). Am DEVASTATED that they're no longer in existence.

I've obviously arrived at the party/ playdate too late
and everyone's
Gone
Home

Wishing y'all a pain-free, sleep-filled night.
My memory is crap but I can't remember hearing much from pneumonia-mumma. Hope you're ok

hoya, night monkey here. Have been studying this evening. Nearly finished one, and have started studying consciousness for Weds, today managed to study for a few hours in one go so think I am finding my stamina again!
I want more spelt scones, ill have to make something tomorrow woth it in, crumble/ something.
well come chicken , sounds like you have a hell of a lot on yer plate! tht is really hard to lool after a kid on your own.I had a bath the other day and my dd was so funny- peering in like why was Iusungbit (usually them) and then she put all their bath toys in yhe bath for me to play with
got to go- vv tired, see you all tomorrow, happy dreams

??
I'm up
Hope you're not.

Wow Maizie. Fantastic that you're getting into your studying. Must make you less stressed, knowing you're on it, too. What IS it with studying and food? I can never do one without other.

I hope you're asleep now Maizie!

I make spelt scones, I never used to be any good at scones using my grandma's recipe, they always came out too heavy - but now I have a brilliant one that is so quick and easy! I always put sultanas in my scones too, I can't deal with plain scones (although I keep meaning to try them with cheese as a savoury alternative) and DH and DS1 love them. I usually do a double quantity of dough, then that gives me about 10 large scones (large cutter of 3) and about 16 mini scones (smallest cutter of the 3). The little ones are brilliant for putting into DS1's lunch box! They're quite dry after a couple of days I suppose, but fine with butter/cream/jam

Chicken - sorry to hear about your neck, that's horrible, hope it's not affecting your balance. Sounds like it really needs seeing to! Get the scan referral if you can, to make sure about disc herniation/bulging or damage; and then either a physio referral or perhaps a McTimoney chiro, if you can afford it. McTimoneys are much more gentle than a standard chiro, and avoid actual "cracking".

I apologise in advance if anyone here has a "thing" against osteopaths/chiropracters - I'm not a big fan of chiros myself, but my BFF swore by them when she had disabling sciatica from the age of 19 - they kept her going, where the doctors said she would probably need an operation to stabilise her pelvic region and "pin" (obviously not, but similar!) her sciatic nerve into place. Only, if she'd had that done, she'd never have been able to ride horses again and that was her life. So she managed it with chiro visits, back supports, limiting herself to what she could deal with relatively comfortably.
My UK osteopath has saved me from constant pain and transitional vertigo, so I'm a big fan. He also stopped me getting SPD in pg #1; but since I'd moved to Australia by the time pg#2 came around, I did get SPD because I wasn't able to get to the osteopath as regularly. When I did go, she fixed me up - but the instability was there by then and so it kept "going out". I learnt the exercise to click it back myself, but it was never as effective as when she did it for me.

Of course there are times and conditions that are completely unsuitable for osteo/chiro intervention and I am sure that many of you have either tried it or been told not to; so I'm not going to evangelise about it any more, just wanted to explain why I offer it as an option.

I am also a trained massage therapist (deep tissue, therapeutic, not much relaxing about my treatments!) and I feel that having back/joint issues myself makes me a better therapist, because I can empathise with people's problems. Honestly, I don't make it "all about me" - but I can suggest things that have worked for me if and only if their condition is similar enough to something I have experienced.

I'm not going to suggest you all have massages either though, don't worry!

Spelt scones with raisins - yum
Good to know there are alternative therapies and solutions for back probs. do you find it hard to massage when you have back problems? It's very demanding physically, isn't it. Lovely though. And such a wonderful gift to share.

Mightbe - to be fair, I haven't done much at all since being out here; but in the UK, I found that I was mostly ok because I saw my osteo every 2-3 weeks, and he would put back anything I had put out through carelessness. But we are taught "mindful practice" - in that we are careful how we position ourselves to do the massage/therapy in order to minimise the impact on our posture etc.
I found it much harder working from home after DS1, because my own massage table was a fold-up one that did not have adjustable height; whereas the one I used in clinic for ~7 years was height adjustable, so much better for the back. :)

I also have the biggest thumb muscles of anyone I know! and in fact, my MN name comes from my clients telling me I had magic thumbs. :)

Oh, and I couldn't do more than a maximum of 5h at a stretch. Mostly I did 3h stretches, 3 times a week; but when I was busy, 4h was quite common, and even 5h on a Saturday. I'd ache like buggery after that though so didn't do it very often!

Wow! The power of the thumb! 5 hours! Those tables are heavy to put up, too. Yes, v spiritual and mindful.
I did an introductory course with a lady called Linda Harness once. Amazing lady. Very Louise Hay. Those were the days: Buddhist meditation, art galleries, travel, diving. And now? Artificial sweetener and Facebook, work and children. Lol

Whereabouts are you in Oz?

I'm in NSW, Mightbe - 1.5h north of Sydney. :)

My table is one of the lightest ones available at the time, ~15kg - but still too heavy for me to cart around regularly. So I don't. When DS2 is a little bigger, I would like to get back into it - but might need to change the focus of what I do to something a little less strenuous

Oooh. Sounds exciting (compromise and being forced to change direction slightly) and will open other things of interest to you and that you're good at, I'm sure.

I looove a good massage and have a combination session with my physio once a week or not if I can't afford it , half massage, half exercise.

I'm not anti chiro etc but haven't really tried though I've been told to ( by another chiro!) Trouble is, everyone you consult seems to promise to help so it's quite hard to know but IMO physio, osteo and chiro can all help but it's all about getting the right person. Then, from what I've read on here, most of them seem to be offering similar treatments.

mightbe, what's with the nocturnal poly posts? Insomnia again?
maizie, well done for all that studying. Because sitting and concentrating are both such issues for me studying is off limits though having so much free time it would, on paper seem a good option.