More Terrible Back Stories

[Matildathecat]

This is the support thread for all sufferers of back pain. Acute, chronic, agony or niggles, we are strictly non competitive. All newcomers very welcome. (Though be warned, the language can be a little 'ripe' ).

Here are our previous threads:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1871592-The-Back-Story
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1992406-The-Back-Story-Continues

My story long and grim but basically had failed surgery for disc prolapse, then further failed surgery to attempt to salvage the situation. I have nerve root damage and severe scarring around the nerve at L5 which won't get better. I'm 48, can't work, take a lot of drugs and have a blue badge. Currently battling several different agencies for ill health retirement and other benefits.

But I'm ok, having some fun despite the pain and have made some lovely friends on here.

So come and join us for moans, advice, downright rants or just a laugh.

matilda don't let that tenant upset you, she is just trying to get away with something. Its people like that which make the big deposits and guarantees necessary, but makes it so difficult for nice people who are on housing benefit. My dsis is and this is a problem for her if she needs a new place.

Thanks live. She was the first housing benefit tenant I've had. She's left a really bad taste in my mouth, it's so personal somehow.

hiya, gals, on here a bit earlier tonight but might still leave a late letter for you matilda
how shitty for you that all this inconvenience and expensive bother is still around now from that idiot tenent, little minx. I can tell you are getting really "hurting under your bra" angry and upset about it but try to let it go- you'll sort it out and move on, dont let her malicious negative energy get you down, you have enough on your plate, love
haha pavlov my dh would guffaw loudly if he heard what you said about not needing to cook coz you have a chef husband. I was a chef for 17 ish yrs and mostly didnt cook much at home- people woul say oh you are lucky bet she cooks loads of nice food at home! and he would give me a knowing look Maybe it is diff for men as I know quite a few male chefs that are mad about it at home and cook, have loads of books, etc but for me it is an inverse relationship and now I am not a chef any more I have been coking more, experimenting etc coz it is back to being a hobby!
matilda thank you it is very kind of you to say that but I am quite pear-shaped with a "stealth bum" of not larege but deffo not small either proportions so I go for a lot of dresses, black trousers, etc to balance me out. I am quite happy with my my weight at the mo- back kind of to before this pg but I do feel quite big sometimes because I was alot skinnier in my twenties while I was working my arse off in london restaurants, long shifts, etc. I was 2 stone lighter then!
Re your list of similarities, yes 5ft2 here, ds has asd (4 yrs old), hip pain, a buttload (poor choice of words!) and a couple undiagnosed people in my near family that dh and I think might be on the spectrum too. I have symptoms when eating wheat so I see where you are coming from like(right person? i hope) , cant remember the other stuff on your list matilda so i'll have to look back again

maizie, thankyou. I love the 'under your bra' bit. So true.xxx

Don't think I could give up dairy. I live on diet yogurt.

Am overwhelmed. Have had nunny Physio - good. Making progress with my machine just hope Aspie-electricity DS doesn't get his hands on it. He once found it and was about to press buttons when I'd fallen asleep and left it ,erm, in woke up JUST in time. Crikey!

Now, Tumour Man told me to go back to rheumatology man (no likey but apparently good). Told me (referred) to go to Physio and pain man too. Had pain man tonight.
Also told me that it was a good job they'd removed tumour as would've 'turned' into a high grade sarcoma vs low grade. And killed me. Woooooah. Feel lucky but freaked out as rheumatology man wasn't even going to do that MRI. So overwhelming. More scans in July. Holiday booked in quite a few months (just after). Flicking better b clear as I neeeed a holiday. In fact I'm sad I can't go away ANYWHERE affordable and pleasant at Easter weekend.

Pain man said I've got neuralgia. And used loads of big words. Poked my back n neck and I kept jerking. He said it's not The wurst case he's ever seen but pretty major throughout Becc n back and has to b managed ASAP. Meds, injections (I'm soooooooo terrified of those pkeeeeeease help me, girls!!!). I'm fine with side of arm or bum cheeks but nowhere else. No veins and not in my fucking back. I must've sworn so much. It's no longer autocorrecting with 'ducking'. Shameful but kinda funny.

He said I've had this for yeeeeeeeears. For me, it diesnt feel painful but his priding gas left my Elc and shoulders tight as anything.
Wooooooah
Now I'm totally overwhelmed.

I have to come clean- I plagerised it from "Dinnerladies" , I loved that series, anyone on here who hasn't it is hilarious- partic for anyone who knows about the catering biz.
oh totally same here goodness, my fav at the mo is the 0% raspberry activia- and they are pre-biotic too, which a well needed bonus for me (terribly prone to thrush )
I really like the normal tesco finest ones too- even normal yogs are quite lowish in fat
I didnt do that much cooking because it all got prepped together and went on together in diff pans, mince split between 2 pots, multi-tasking
I want to try spelt pastry and make either apple pie (dh) or pecan pie (me) or maybe sponge to see if that works.
my parents are visiting us saturday so we are going to put the tv up onto the wall to give more space 9dh and my dad will do it while me and my mum look on)
ds has been just in pants with no accidents all day for 6 days now! just nappies at night. dd is interested in sitting on the loo so it wont be long for her either- I can actually imagine a nappyless future! bliss
had an awesome day at uni today- Parapsychology in the am and consciousness in the afternoon, really enjoyed it.
Was very achey today because I took dd and ds out up to peckham yesterday- 15 mins walk there, round a couple shops and 15 mins walk back, but was worth it coz we got helium balloons and they loved them.
Was super achey at uni today due to th extra activity yesterday - sounds alot like your deep hip ache but I get it all round the pelvis area, I feel like when I was 9 months pg and had spd but there is no massive bump there! weird.
It is hard to know f it is getting better because I think today wasnt bad- then look at what i've taken over the day and re-think it. or I so more coz feel better initially and then pay for it next day. It didnt halp that when i got home from uni after a half hour sit down we all went up peckham to get shoes for the kids, go in morrisons and go to macD's, so was struggling a bit when got home and had to take 2 morphene -1 hour between them and fil up th hottie. better now.
sorry i am just blathering on about my day, witter, witter
how has everyone been today? I keep thinking it is Friday today, keep mixing up my days :(
oo, did buy 3 dresses for £6 each and a bracelet for a pound. they are stretchy long t-shirt material type dresses- not to last a long time but diff colours to cheer up. One is black with dark green roses print, in quite large. One is cherry red with white daisies all over and the 3rd is floral print of white, pink baby blue, bit of yellow and dark pink. I dont have a lot of long dresses because so many of them are about a foot too long for my whole body so they "fill a gap". I am going to have a "ruthless edit" of my wardrobe tomorrow and get rid of things that dont suit, dont fit ( I am NEVER going to fit into those gap size 0 jeans again so why are thy still in my wardrobe?) or are nor age suitable
hope you all have pain free nightime and good day tomorrow

ooooooo, just realised its line of duty night!! off to watch, gripping stuff, matilda you are hooked too aren't you?

sorry cross posted with you goodness, didnt know whether to laugh or be horrified, doesnt bear thinking about if he'd turned it on
you poor thing, those injections sound scary, can you like drink heavily beforehand- calm the nerves? pardon the pun. I had to have a drink before getting my hair cut yrs ago coz used to stress alot about it. btw I couldnt believe your schedile for toaday, it made me tird just looking at it!

Maizie, loved to hear about your day. Exhausting all that walking. Some wonderful moments are worth the morphene, huh?
Did it work - the second one?

Maizie. Lolling
Nope. Don't drink. It's awful for me. Manes me I'll with migraine straight away. Don't feel sorry for me though - I have foooood and shopping.
Lol

And my day ended wonderfully: a fake tan. I feel wonderful when I look I'm the mirror. Even if I'm emotional, back all question marked and still traumatised... I'm BROWN!
Bloody TV didn't record TOWIE. Grrrr

Thanks for the welcome ??

Am currently propped up in a hospital bed connected to various machines (no catather Thank God). And the PCA pump is kicking ass.

Operation went well by all accounts though not exactly to plan. Took a few hours longer due to serious amount of calcification. The Doc did comment that he was surprised I wasn't in more pain from it. I know that may seem a bit 'oh I've had it worse aren't I brave' but no matter how good and empathic any of them have been, and I have been very lucky on that side of things. I have always had that niggle in the back of my mind that they thought I was a wimp, or making it up or drug seeking etc. this feels like I've been proven. Does that make sense? Or am I talking crap again.

Ohhhh pressed post too soon sounds like some of you have had great days.
Maizie the dresses sound lovely particularly the red/ white one.
Where the hell do you get the energy? Shopping and uni in the one week? Though shopping is a bit of an issue with me ATM. I like shopping alone and can't right now. That fine when with my friends…but OH agggghhhhhh.

And not in the stereotypical way. He's a lets try everything on in every shop then go back to the first shop and start again. Now I like a mooch around as much as the next but we end up spending hours and hours and hours and end up with nothing. Not even a tee shirt because 'what if I see something I like better tomorrow?' My answer would be well then you have 2 nice T-shirts, not wasteful because he has so few everyday clothes and by the time he decides that yes he does want the first tshirt, weeks later the shop of course has sold out. This is no exaggeration. Thankfully (!) with my inability to walk/ stand recently he's been 'forced' to shop on line so I can just feign interest while watching TV.

Goodness sounds like you been in the wars…don't you love when Docs say something that they think is good news but makes you think WTF!!!!!

Re: injections can they not Valium you up for them with some local analgesic cream? Then just sit/ lie on your side and read pretend it's not happening?

Matilda thanks for the kind wishes and the advice.
Sorry you've had such a crap time with your tenant needs a slap/wake up to real life. Having friends who are both landlords and regular renters I know they'd agree. Does she realise that she's only making it harder for others thought I'm sure that the last thing on her mind BUT that landlords and agency's talk to each other she'll find it harder and harder to get a nice place with shitty behaviour like that.

Sorry bit rambling on, it's a very long night.

Vintage, that makes absolute sense!
I feel the same after last night's performance alone. Lots of prodding, romping flinch-jumps by me and a diagnosis of gd only knows what and exactly the same 'I can't believe you've been living with this. You're body's nerves are on fire!'
Neuralgia across the lower, upper back and neck.

Matilda, did I miss something about your tenant. What's wrong? Sorry if you've no energy to repeat, don't worry.

Vintage, I can't remember whether this is your first hospital op on your back - and how long are you supposed to be in there for? Are you okay? Pain minimal, nice nurses (esp at night as they can be dodgy) and do you have an ipad with good downloads? I can recommend Orange is the New Black

Got my ipad just before hospital and was / has been best thing ever.

goodness first post on page ten. Last para. Very glad of all the nice people here. My DH just says don't worry about it but it's not so easy, is it?

Had tons of spinal injections. Happy to hold your hand. Promise it's really fine. Guessing it's private so might be quite soon? And yay to the ninny machine! It works anyway.

maizie, bit irritated by ending of LOD, think I'll watch it again as was doped up but I hate it when they suddenly bring on new characters. I'm quite face blind so it takes me ages to remember who they all are. My best shows have four people each with very different hair etc, then I know what's going on! And yay to dry pants...how fab. I think kids have spurts of maturation iykwim?

vintage glad you are safe and comfortable. Op sounds sore so go steady, love. Go Steady is a catch phrase on here, just in case you missed it .

I'm terribly sore today. All back pain. It will be due to something I've done in the past few days but I'll be buggered if I know what .

I am wearing jeggings! With a nice stripy mid thigh length dress, red shoes (Hotter, I've not gone too far) and a red cardi, I am blaming you lot. I feel a bit grown up and a bit feminine, it's weird. Can I put my trainers on now? Got GCSE options evening for DS1 tonight so it's a bit like putting on armour really, my 'don't mess with me' look.

Goodness injections are fine, where will yours be? I had a lovely bit of IV sedation for mine, it was the best thing ever.

Vintage, do what Matilda said .

Well working on tuesday and football training last night have done for me, I am broke. Right hand side of my thoarcic spine causes me to make noises like I'm in labour when I move about, I have no control anymore. Plus the added stress this week has made the IBD, which came as a side order with the inflam arthritis, flare up. Just thought I would share that with you.

Haha yes to the Labour Groan. I'm the Transition Stage Groaner ( not allowed to push but feeling desperate )

Outfit sounds fab. No you may not wear trainers unless you are participating in a sporting event. Hope you've put your face on and done your hair a bit. The teachers will be in suitable awe.

Glad you are feeling up to clothes thoughts even though you are suffering. Bastard backs.

goodnes, I've just counted that I've had spinal injections in five different places. All had different protocols.

I've never had any sedation...does that make me tough?

One chap asked about my pain so I told him about the cricket bat feeling. When the needle was in he asked if it was hurting to which I replied 'I'm the girl who forever feels as if she's been hit by a cricket bat. Carry on!'

Exhausted.
Back is mooooore tense and painful than ever following Dr Pain's prodding proof. Blaaaah
Feel really down about it as had thought it was all over. Much as I love you all, I felt an intruder and certainly looked forward to sweeping everything under the carpet and getting on with my life. Feel happy to seem to have a ticket to be 'in your gang' but, having narrowly and scarily escaped the cancer gang (I hope / gd forbid - next scans for that in July) I was hoping to be gang free in TES of health scares n problems.
Fortunately, as I said, I love you all and we do talk about things that make me smile: interesting DCs, fashion, etc. and without your support , I'd not have/ be getting through it.

And yes please to any hand holding IF a second opinion means I end up going for it.

Can I ask: anyone else been poked n prodded n jumped across the room?
And then felt like all muscles tensed so that shoulders were nearly at ears?

that sounds really unpleasant goodness, not been prodded much but it sounds horrid- hope it leads to some help for you anyway.
vintage I did have energy at the time- but I regretted it when I got home, crashed, got badly deep-achey and had to look afetr the 2 kids coz my dh was having a nap. I dont know how to tell him that I need a lie down when i come in or it gets too much- coz obviously he is also tired and not feeling totally well this week and has a bad headache so I said nothing but had to take 3 morphine an hour after each before and got a nasty tight tensed feeling in my middle back. It happened again today as well- I think it used to be our routine when i was ok that i took over when i get home but he doesnt seem to realise when i am out it is a strain- even if i m sitting mostly- in fact sometimes more.
My lecturer was trying to pursuade me to go and get referred to the pain team now rather than "later if it doesnt get better" I am seriously thinking about it coz I am starting to feel a bit overwhelmed trying to manage it myself. Just on a bit of a roller-coaster with the meds, like you goodness I have been feeling a bit down- post op blues maybe cos you think it might be all better straight away back in the corner of your mind and when it isnt and there is so much uncertainty it is a bit depressing.
We are argueing a lot as we are stressde- he has a very, very bad and distressing family situation that has been going on for a long while so he is very stressed. He said I was doing too much- I need to rest more, but then he doesn't get it that when I come in from being at uni etc and he immediately goes away or to bed then it can leave me stranded in the middle of the pain. I had to have a little drink to get through today- I know thats bad, not proud of it but sometimes the achey type pain just doesnt respond to much else.
sorry this has been a bit rambling- i nneded to get it odff my chest is all.
He and ds are going to his mil's in a weeks time and i will have to look after dd on my own - pavlov any tips as you are in that situation with your kids, how do you cope? I am not supposed to lift her. She is at that "pick me up" constantly stage and wriggly too, I am just feeling a bit worried about it. He said tonight he wont go if i cant enlist help from friends or family but i dont want to ruin their plans. I do feel a lot syronger and have almost no hip pain (just first thing in the early am around 6) but I still have back pain there all the time- not strongly, just there- and it just creeps and creeps up the more I do. plus been having right buttock pain. ho hum, apologies again for massive droning on
I have online shopped a few dresses (more!) from new look (quite cheap) and they are nice, all a bit floral summer type dresses- tea dress with crotchet hem, wrap dress and floral, noo sleeves, v-neck one with ruffles of the floral material over the boob area(good for wee boobs like moi)
also got new shoes for dd- pink flashing light trainers; ds- black and red trainers and me- brown brogues with mid-size heel and laces.
I think I am re-doing my adolescence with all this shopping fever, retail therapy! maybe coz i am going back to my studies (???)
oo anyone like Ron Burgandy I want to seee the new film
pain free nights and days to all of you sleeping beauties and hope goodness that you dont wake at 4am [grin)
want to change my mind and try spelt pancakes and scones next mmmmm

goodness hope you figure out how to deal with the injection fear- valium is used for people afraid of flying so why the hell not?
so sorry to hear you are in bad pain matilda and losty, sending big hugs over the e-waves. hope you are able to get more rest or whateevre will make it improve a bit for you. I know yes matilda LOD did feel like there wa going to be another episode- i only realised about 10 mins from the end it was the last one! idiot me! hope there is a series 3 and that they tell us what happened next, I heard the bridge has another series in the pipeline. Any Game of thrones bods on here? I am waiting eagerly for the next series sterting again in april.
any one neeeding a series to watch try "Life"- 2 seasons, Damien Lewis, fucking brilliant. It gor cancelled so no more being made, criminal. You would like it ebev more than Breaking Bad matilda
what is everyone getting for their mum or getting as a mum from there wee ones? have you read the mumsnet do's and donts- [no comment]
till tomorrow xx
ps no you dont sound at all off vintage I can relate to that extrememly and I havent even been like having these issues very long so that tells me thre must be a lot of that feeling around for us to pick up on it. I had cysts from pcos- no probs but one month I had some pain over my abdomen , dr said it couldnt be the blood filled one bursting coz it is really painful- then coz i was having a scan soon after and it was gone! so it had been that, i was right and he was talking out of his rectum