*Tamoxigang Christmas Party* - 45

[Tiny100]

Morning All!

We're nearly in December, so let's get the festivities started.

[adds mince pies to the trolley]

I can understand how you feel. I'm actually glad of Xmas. Because it'll help to distract me. I think. What I don't like is the question: What have you got planned over the holidays? I don't know the answer. I know what I HAD planned. To relax. To enjoy. Not to distract myself while waiting for RNOH to call me in to discuss THEIR plans for me.im finding my usual insomnia (2-4 or 4-6) hard now as I lie there knowing why I ache. It's not the bloody mattress after all ;(

Goodness, I love the BBC radio iplayer for those four in the morning, brain churning like a washing machine moments. The mundane chuntering of radio 4s You and Yours is better than sleeping tablets to me.

I am feeling really good at the moment.

It's my wedding anniversary tomorrow. 17 years of being married to my best friend, lover and own personal super hero. I am very lucky. I have bought him a bar of his favourite soap.

trice it's lovely to hear you in such good spirits. I remember you were struggling so much back when I was first diagnosed (but still on here offering advice and support :) ) so it's brilliant news that you are doing so much better now :) :) :)

(I too stick R4 on in the sleepless wee small hours, it always sends me back to sleep!)

to old and new faces on here. Sorry I haven't been posting much on here lately, I have been thinking of you all, reading and keeping up with your news.

Goodness have you considered sleeping tablets ? Not sleeping makes everything seem worse, I've been on them on and off through my treatment

Trice it's great you are happy

Been to the hospital, all healing fine and no seroma. I just have a little pain sometime on the underside of my arm but she said that's due to nerve damage and is normal.

Hi all, a quick hello from me.

Malt, good to hear everything is healing ok. You're really missing work aren't you. Must be great to have a job that you love that much

Trice, lovely to hear that you are feeling good. Your dh sounds lovely.

Betsy, how are you doing on the tamoxifen?

Goodness, hope you are feeling ok today.

Saw my boss and colleagues yesterday for a nice meal out. I'm on track for back to work in 2 weeks. Don't feel ready - eek!

Have been wondering about really and handbags....not heard from them lately....

Marshy - I'm having hot flushes, but not that many more than I was during/after chemo. I'm also suffering a bit with achy joints, but not sure if that's the remnants of the tax truck (as was suffering before tamoxifen), the cold/wet weather (have had achy hips and knees for as long as I can remember in the cold/damp), the tamoxifen, or a combination of all of them! Other than that nothing so far, but still early days I guess (2+ weeks) - How are you getting on?
I will need to start thinking about planning my return to work shortly (I'm assuming I'll get my rads dates at the planning session on Tues) - and much as I have missed it, it's a bit scary to think about going back isn't it? It's like saying everything is "normal" again, when in fact things will never be "normal" again, well not the old "normal" I had, I guess we need time to adjust to the new"normal".

and I pressed post before I said...
malt - I'm glad to hear everything is healing up nicely. :)

I've also got achy joints with Letrozole - some days OK, but other days (especially when tired) I take ibuprofen.
Still feeling a bit nauseous - and have terrible heartburn, which is apparently common with/post-chemo. Anyway, this means I'm still losing some weight which is good for me.
My Oncologist is waiting until I've been on the hormonal pill for 3 months, then having me scanned and deciding then whether I shall have rads, so I won't be having those until February, if at all.
I'm quite worried about going back to work full time as I am still very tired and 12 hour days out of the house 5 days per week will be very hard.

Hi all

marshy I'm still around, just finished work for the year!! Although just worked a 60+ hour week! Luckily it was full of great Christmas activities, but must admit I was glad to finish tonight!

Sadly I can't really start my Christmas break properly until Monday lunchtime. Have an oncologist appointment on Monday. Luckily it is an early one, so he shouldn't be running late she says hopefully

Sorry I haven't really had chance to keep up with posts this week. So can't really comment on anyone in particular. But hope everyone has been enjoying the build up to Christmas. (not long now)

I still need to pack my bag ready to go to my parents, but I really don't have the energy right now! So that'll have to be tomorrow's job.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. Mine will include a much needed lie in and hot choc and cake with a friend xxxxx

Wren48 - thanks for that, useful to know - my Mum has been through it these last few months, so hopefully given time she will recover more - it's just so sad and frustrating to see her like this. On the plus side though, she seems mostly unaware of it though and is very cheery!

Haven't thought to listen to R4. How would I do that without waking DH? Ideas welcome ;)
I have had a wonderful day- family Xmas party. So lovely. A whiz around Hamleys, too. Given a parking ticket for being 1 minute over - literally! I told the traffic warden my current medical 'status', showed them a picture (phone) of the consultant's verdict and let them look down upon the confused faces of my 6 and 3 yr old. They ripped the ticket off. Hell - there have got to be some benefits (children didn't hear me).
On the other hand, I took my DS wall climbing this morning and had to climb to the third tier of a car park because the blummin' ticket machine was out of order - wearing a sign that said I needed to. Was really f€$ed off. I was easily able to walk there. My symptoms are confoundedly negligeable. What angered me was fear. What'll I do when I'm not able to drive, walk to the meter, take my son to school, have the pleasure of watching my DC in their activities, make sure that they get there, earn so that they can...
Gd I sound depressive. Think I am a bit. Wonderful day was crushed by twi loving friends calling to see 'how I was doing'. Now, on any other day that'd have been like a lifeline. Today, after the Xmas festivities bad distraction of Hamleys, it brought me crashing down to a reality of my imagination and fears.
Still, was a wonderful day and I'm looking forward to plenty more days of fun bad distraction over Christmas.

Been up since 4 width 'achey hip'. Just pit 'sarcoma' into MN search engine and scared my own pants off! Came up with stuff like 'miss him so much'. Jeeeez.
Note to self: do NOT google this stuff, not ever, never ever - eeeeveb on MN. Full stop

Goodness - STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER!
seriously don't google, most of the stuff you find is way out of date (even five years old can be way out of dates as treatments are moving so fast these days) If you really must look choose reputable sites like MacMillan (not that you need to as they think yours is benign, they generally have a pretty good feel for these things - I was told they really didn't like the look of mine and they were right - but obviously only your biopsy will give a definitive answer)
The waiting for results and treatment plan bit is truly shite, and we all empathise with how crap it is, but, honestly, itdoes get a bit easier once you know what's what and you have your plan.

Re R4, I put the volume really low, it's never woken DH yet, but if your DH is a light sleeper do you have any headphones? (or you can buy special pillows with speakers in!)

goodness
Do not google, everyone is different.
Can you get some herbal nytol? They work well.
I mn or read if I can't sleep.
Tamoxifen ladies, in not gate crashing, I'm visiting.
Had my brca2 positive results recently so am off for ovary removal sine tine soon. No big deal as I've already had "the big one" or two in my case
Pre op assessment Monday which will mean I get to finish work early yay!

Morning all
I think we all say don't google but we can't help ourselves sometimes ! I know I do it and always feel worse especially if it's in the middle of the night
Ledkr good luck with your op, is ovary removal a big op I don't know much about it. How long ago did you have BC. ?

I've decided wine is the answer, was not depressed last night and slept well

Good for you malt.

Goodness- I have sarcoma . The stuff on the net (as with A. Lot of medical stuff) Is extreme and out of date. If you are at rnoh, you are going to get the best care there possibly is. I had my second op there -care couldn't have been better. Ask away if you are scared or pm me love if it helps. Malt is right that losing sleep does nothing for being rational .

Ledkr- at getting out of work early. I saw you on another thread so was wondering how you are doing. At least if you have this dine you will be dealing with the brca bad odds I assume.

Really-hope you get a good rest over Xmas, eek at 60 day week.

I better get up as got tons of wrapping to do -dsis visiting later and also got acupuncture to perk me up ( this helps with insomnia).

Anyone else looking forward to the strictly final?

Rnoh not moh.

Not rational. Moi? You've noticed? Lolling

Why am I under the sarcoma centre if they think it's benign? That's what I'm wondering. It's a rarer than rare tumour and has gone into my spinal canal. Still can't get my head around it ( hence dull repetition - apologies). WHY DO I FEEL FINE THEN? Can't (won't) compute.

Pillows with speakers. Like it!

Ledkr I hope the op goes smoothly for you without too much discomfort. Do you have a date? Hate that question. Sorry.

Yes. I'm under RNOH. Hope the consultants are better than the building - if that makes sense ;) felt like I was in a zipped up prefab. I know it's no holiday, but... how the heck do people who find it hard to get around even park in walking / hobbling distance if the 'bit' (really) of the hospital they're trying to find. What a wagmire. I'm bejng v superficial here. It's all I've got to go on. (Smiles weakly).

It's a pit of a building isn't it? But they are very good at care.

Who is your consultant ? Sarcoma as I understood it covers about 70 plus cancers/ other conditions . Some of which may be benign. More relevantly you need the specialist team who get tumours out of small spaces every day so your referral may be as much to do with how it is treated as anything else.