Page 7 | Tamoxifen 34 *the power of Sauron*

HerNextDoorAt21 · 01/04/2013 22:50

coorong hope you saw my wee message to you earlier its further down today's posts.

coorong · 01/04/2013 22:56

Yes thanks hernextdooor
I'm crashing night sleep well all

topsyturner · 01/04/2013 22:57

I've not gone , I am a fickle flouncer !

Eek , what day are your results Coorong ?
Will get the candle burning for you .

NotJenkins LOVE the name change

Can I be NotInLoveWithDamienLewisNoReallyNotMe ?????

HND you still sober ?
Remember , one day at a time ...

Original poster

MaryAnnSingleton · 01/04/2013 22:58

wtf is happening ?? I have come back to find discontent and horridness - I will quit too if there's no kk or topsy. I don't quite understand what the problem is- we talk about everything on here, from grimness to complete flippancy yet we are all united in one thing -and we can deal with the depths of despair with great sensitivity. I would be seriously lost without my friends on this thread -many of whom have been here for coming up to 4 years so please let's calm down and not get all prickly.

OP posts:

Copthallresident · 01/04/2013 23:14

Well said MAS

Damien is sitting next to me on the coach, just saying.

topsyturner · 01/04/2013 23:20

Sorry Mas

PUT HIM DOWN Cop !!!

HerNextDoorAt21 · 01/04/2013 23:22

topsy I may have opened a bottle after the day I've had but there's still some left !!!! I finished my Indian snacks got brunch today .... Twas lovely !

KurriKurri · 01/04/2013 23:30

Do not get flustered because of me, - I am just going to have a little break, but will be back (generally I think I am feeling rather vulnerable and over sensitive atm. probably due to sick doggy).

Loads of love to all, and good vibes to everyone waiting for results and having appointments.

If there's anything I can help anyone with regarding treatments and ops. Do PM me if I'm not on the thread, and I'll try my best to help xx

AshokanFarewell · 01/04/2013 23:34

Oh dear, things have got a bit weird. It would be a shame for anyone to leave! It is such a wonderful place for support and it's the silliness on this thread that lightens my mood and helps me to feel almost normal.

Ladies who posted on my Facebook wall with your nicknames, I've hidden your posts as I did an experiment and googling all three nicknames, even shortened, brings up one of the old threads so have hidden them so we are not all identified by nosey parkers!

HND today sounds like a total nightmare, you must be exhausted, so hopefully you've had a more relaxing evening and tomorrow will be a better day [bugrin]

coorong fingers crossed for your results :)

Am very sleepy and there have been so many posts I can't keep up but I'm sending positive thoughts to everyone, hope you all get a good night's sleep and will catch up in the morning! :)

thegreylady · 01/04/2013 23:34

Whatever happens no one must go. MAS, KK, Topsy and Gigs etc you are the thread. I don't come here so often now but when I do it is usually when I or someone else needs support. If someone needs to be relentlessly serious then maybe bcc is the right place. This thread is for real women who have or have had a filthy disease yet still manage to chat and joke sometimes and have clawed back a semblance of normality for themselves and their families.
They have been here for one another through the devastation of a Mets diagnosis and the sheer terror of the first confrontation with a cancer dx. They hold hands with strangers who have become sisters, friends far beyond just a thread on a forum.
Tamoxifen 34! That stands for something really special in terms of love and support. Please keep the jollity and don't leave or change anything. Time enough for sadness and solemnity when it is needed.

AshokanFarewell · 01/04/2013 23:35

KK sending extra positive thoughts to you and lady dog tonight, and please don't stay away long!

Original poster

MaryAnnSingleton · 01/04/2013 23:41

Thanks for that greylady x
Lots of good thoughts to dear KK and old day dog.

OP posts:

Copthallresident · 02/04/2013 00:02

Lots of good thoughts to KK also, as well as Old Lady Dog, goondog sending his special old lady dog reinvigorating lurve too. Hopefully you will both have a good nights sleep.

Gigondas · 02/04/2013 07:51

gigs playing her one man band I think it's time we had a bit of a sing song on the coach [copth and topsy put Damian down] and have some from the flask.

Agree with grey and mas that too much love and support on here to let things die so let's start afresh today.

Sorry you had shit day hnd - hope you can rest up a bit (nurse is right as that's what settled my wound but easier said then done with kids).

Going to ring dr shortly- let's see if can get thru ! So can get more painkillers- steroids are to calm nerve inflammation.

Who else has appt this week? Coorong? Ash- when is your next visit to dr w? Pen are you appt free this week?

Gigondas · 02/04/2013 07:52

And kurri I am sorry about old lady dog- I know how precious she is so it must be horrid for you .

thegreylady · 02/04/2013 08:08

Kurri just checking to see how lady dog is doing this morning. Thinking of you all x

HerNextDoorAt21 · 02/04/2013 08:14

Perfectly said greylady

Hope you get through to the doc gigs and you get some relief.

kk hope you lovely dog is ok and that you don't stay away, your posts are lovely

Well a better start to the day, DH is here, the sun is out and I haven't tripped over my drain tube yet !!!! I say good morning to topsy but the lazy moo,will,still be sleeping I'm sure !!!!

topsyturner · 02/04/2013 08:24

I'm up !
(Reluctantly , but I'm up !)

Thanks for the music Gigs , much appreciated x

Hope everyone is doing ok this morning .
Any news on surgery dates yet Gigs ?

It's another Bank Holiday today over here . They have the Monday and Tuesday , aswell as quite often the Friday too !
We are off into town shortly (hence the early rise) as DD wants to spend some more of her birthday money .

What ever you are all up to today , hope its a good one .

gingeroots · 02/04/2013 08:50

I just want to say that I am a real woman and I do have a filthy disease .

I'm sorry I've upset people and I think greylady is right and that I need to find a different forum .

We're all different aren't we ? Some styles suit some people better than others .

I'm sorry that in saying what I did I've ,unintentionally ,criticised your thread .
It was stupid ,badly worded ,immature ,I should have kept my thoughts to myself . Hopefully it's a lesson I'll learn for the future as I go through all the nasty stuff that lies ahead of me .

But I promise I wasn't trying to "mess about " .

topsyturner · 02/04/2013 08:54

Ginger you are very welcome to stay here .
It's a fabulous resource for info , we all get told the docs opinions on treatments . But sometimes people who have been there can tell you the stuff that the docs don't tell you !

Anyhow , it's your choice .
No hard feelings from me anyway x

HerNextDoorAt21 · 02/04/2013 09:46

ginger I also think that you should stick around to see the full range of conversations that go on here. I agree that the info you get from real people who have been through the cancer experience is very valuable. by all means go and seek out other forums and see what you can find .... I have personally not found anything else I liked.

jchocchip · 02/04/2013 09:50

Was just popping on to send good vibes to ginger for her appointment today. Have you managed to sort out care for your Mum?

Some on this thread are under a lot of stress and I don't know why it kicked off yesterday, but we can have a new start today.

Much love to you all, [buenvy] to those with an extra holiday. If I don't go now I am going to be really late [busad] Making the most of the [busmile] while we have them [bugrin]

AshokanFarewell · 02/04/2013 10:15

ginger I hope you don't think anyone was implying you weren't a real woman or you didn't have a horrible illness! It is just that this is a thread where we can be ourselves as well as just cancer. Like I mentioned a while back, at times I've felt like I'm just a walking bowel, like the illness has become who I am. But here we are a group of people who chat and joke and support each other and just happen to have or have had cancer. We can be very serious when we need to be though.

If you tell us something serious then we won't make a joke of it, unless you wanted to, if that's what you are worrietd about. We make jokes of our own situations mostly, and join in jokes about each other. But no one would come on the thread and make a joke about someone else's situation if they didn't know the other person was okay with it, I hope that makes sense I'm not exactly sure how to word it!

Anyway, please don't feel you have to leave, this is a wonderful source of support, even if no one has been through exactly the same, someone will have been through something similar and we will all try and understand and support you [busmile]

Good morning topsy enjoy your trip to town, I hope DD finds something she likes.

HND enjoy the sunshine and I hope you get a bt more rest today! [busmile]

gigs hope you've managed to get through to the doctor and get your meds sorted. I'm not sure when my next appt with Dr W is, I'm having problems rescheduling. It's meant to be tomorrow but I'm now having a little procedure, just day surgery, on my pouch, which will make life sooooo much easier hopefully. No one will give me a new appointment though or explain how I will know whether I'm having the infusion or not if they won't let me see him! [buhmm]

jane have a fabulous day, I hope you aren't late, definitely with you on the bunnies, shall miss them when they're gone! [bugrin]

KK I hope you and old lady dog had a good night

Good morning to anyone I've missed or cross posted with. I hope you all have a lovely day. We have clear blue skies and glorious sunshine here so I'm feeling full of the joys of spring, absolutely freezing though! [bugrin]

SparkleRainbow · 02/04/2013 11:05

Am popping in to say hi. Waving to all people who have joined since I have been AWOL, which is a while......sorry. Nice to see my dear friends are still doing a brilliant job of supporting each other through........ All fighters and survivors the lot of you!
Do we still have a fbs trolley on which I can leave hot cross buns, chocolate cake etc.....?

Copthallresident · 02/04/2013 11:36

Glad you stuck around ginger We are all real women and we all have or have had (not that you are ever allowed to say you are cured) this filthy disease, some of us more than once, so we have all had very dark days and would certainly not make a joke of those feelings. You are absolutely right we are all different. I dealt with the darkest days alone, it was only by walking mile upon mile that I found a way to make the dark thoughts recede, come to terms with the fact that my life was going to be different, but I would still be able to laugh as well as cry (oh and by being really nasty to my parents ).

Since then I have been put in touch with a lot of women in the same situation and they have coped in many different ways, I have known women who never stopped feeling angry and wondering "why me", and women who became deeply depressed and people who have been in complete denial. All perfectly normal ways to respond. Perhaps one of those other forums will help.

Personally I and the group of women I went through treatment with felt it was really important to laugh as well as cry, humour can put cancer back into it's box (it is after all just a few offensive mutant cells, not the "big C" that society has built it into in our minds), helps you reassert your own personality when doctors nurses and even friends are trying to make the Cancer define you and when what you are going through is so extraordinary it helps to take the piss out of it's most ludicrous aspects and some of the characters you deal with along the way. It was refreshing to come across a thread with women who responded the same way, and I am sure you can understand why they would defend their own way of coping.

What you are going through IS deeply traumatic and another legacy of experience of it is that I am now studying how trauma is expressed in literature. Noone can assimilate the horror of a traumatic experience straight away so our brains let us take it out in small chunks to deal with it . One of the wisest women writers who underpins my work was writing during the war and when she and her friends were in a city that fell to the Japanese, surrounded by scenes of the utmost brutality especially towards women she said she and her friends turned to thinking about clothes, that when life is so extraordinary you cling to whatever shred of normality you have left. So if we are fluffy, it is because normal is important sometimes.

Sorry to go on, but hope it helps .

I have to hurry away as Nazi Polish builder just arrived to shore up our house for a little while longer, so now have to focus on light fittings and pipes and things.

But thinking of and sending good thoughts to all with appointments and needing new fittings and pipes, and hoping KK and old lady dog had a good night.