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Original poster

Alcoholics or Dependant Drinkers Club

791 replies

Rhubarb · 24/04/2006 12:43

For SoftStuff, tyedye and anyone else who wants to join.

The rules are that you HAVE to sign in every night to let us know TRUTHFULLY how much you have drunk. You need to let us know your triggers too. So if you resisted for 12 hours but then cracked and had a beer - what finally snapped?

We'll be here to give you encouragement, support, advice and opinions.

OP posts:
Chocol8 · 24/04/2006 23:03

Haven't read all this thread, but Themoon, just wondered if you realised that a can of Stella is 3 units each.

If you work out the 1 hour to one unit rule, the alcohol could still be in your system tomorrow morning, depending on how early you get up. If you drive and get pulled, it's a years ban and a drink impaired drivers course for 14 weeks through probation, never mind the criminal record.

Don't want to scare you or be dramatic, but I know people who have been caught the morning after binge drinking and lost their licences and sometimes their livelihoods and families.

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 24/04/2006 23:27

The only way for me is to not have it in the house. I've drunk the last of my bottle of wine - I knew I wouldn't be able to resist, so I'm not buying anymore until Saturday at the earliest.

Kids still sick, been stuck in the house blah, blah - it's no excuse!

SoftStuff · 25/04/2006 01:08

Well i'm alcohol free still but really really really wanting one, I feel all jittery and in serious need of calming down. I can't believe i'm going to be able to sleep at all.

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 01:31

Hi SoftStuff, I've been thinking of you since you first posted and I'm glad you're making a go of it. The first few days are the worst, hang in there though. I used to think I could never do without it...proved myself wrong! Hang in there, people drink themsleves to death with procrastination. It happened to my husband. I wish you well xxx

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 01:32

This is a great idea, a support thread...well one Rhubarb for initiating it and all of you who're giving it a go xxx

SoftStuff · 25/04/2006 01:40

kokeshi, your husband drank himself to death? Sad

I'm more than a bit shocked that i'm having trouble stopping/cutting down. I really do need a drink right at this moment, my mind's in overtime.

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 01:51

Yeah, not in the way of liver cirrhosis, but ended up hanging himself whilst on an extended bender. He was only 43. I nearly ended going down the same route myself so I really know what you're going through at the moment. Please don't give up.

SoftStuff · 25/04/2006 01:55

I'm so so sorry, I don't know what to say. I really appreciate your support even more. One of the reasons for drinking lots was to kill off those type of negative thoughts, they're still very much there.

SoftStuff · 25/04/2006 01:59

Before you possibly panic, I'm calling my gp first thing in the morning for an appointment.

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 02:12

It all goes hand in hand really...drinking to quash the feelings of depression, getting a temporary reprieve when you have a drink, then feeling twice as bad the next day. Then the cycle repeats. Again and again until the drink doesn't work any more and you're just left with horrble emptiness and despair.

It's a nasty vicious circle but, you're doing great. I guarantee you that the panic, fear and suicidal thoughts will disappear in time. You need support and you're more than worthy of it!

It's strange actually, SoftStuff, this thread coming up as it's coming up to the 2nd anniversary of his death at the beginning of next month. I guess if anything good can come out of it, like you or anyone else who sees this and takes action on their drinking, then it's not totally been in vain xxx

SoftStuff · 25/04/2006 02:24

Thing is, I haven't found anything else that works. Nothing else numbs those feelings. It's not just the thoughts (just is the wrong word but ykwim) it's real memories and negative experiences I want to go away. I'm crying now as I often do.

I really am in awe that you've got your life together again, even more so that you're trying to help myself and others.

I really hope I can actually get some kind of life back. I'm not living now.

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 02:33

It's probably hard at the moment to figure out what you're feeling. Racing brain, raw, everything overwhelming you at this point in time.

You sounds like you have real issues that have to be resolved, and they only get stuffed down by the drink, to resurface when you're sober.

Your memories, issues and problems HAVE to be dealt with for you to move on, your drinking is only delaying this, it will all still be there and worse.

I don't know what these things are but they are not bigger than you. You have had such courage to open up and ask for help. If I can help you in any way, please know that I'm here for you. xxx

tyedye · 25/04/2006 10:00

Hello everybody,where on earth did you all come from!? Talk about open the floodgates!!!I drink to quell anxiety and depression.I also know however that alcohol is a depressent and makes me worse,so i drink more!Its a vicious circle.Dying of cirrhosis as my father did,is a slow ugly end.So what am i doing?I am demonstrating to my 4 kids a lifestyle/example of adult life interwined with chronic alcohol abuse,Not good.

FioFio · 25/04/2006 10:04

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tyedye · 25/04/2006 10:16

Ive had counselling,she added up my units with me etc,Knowing what you are doing to yourself is a long way from being able to stop.pathetic isnt it!

kokeshi · 25/04/2006 10:23

Hi tyedye, I'm sorry to hear about your father. It must have been devastating to watch. Have you had any alcohol related illnesses, or a diagnosis from the doctor? I don't think it's an inevitability that you will go the same way...you are seeking help already and that is one of the hardest things to do. Well done x

FioFio · 25/04/2006 10:24

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themoon66 · 25/04/2006 10:25

Well, I was good last night and did resist that third can of Stella. And tonight I'm going out jogging with some friends, so that will be an incentive to keep the whole day healthy. The red grape juice, however, remains unopened in the fridge, just below the 4 bottles of cava.

tyedye · 25/04/2006 10:28

i drink because my life is a nightmare.

tyedye · 25/04/2006 10:29

my gp tells me to stop it.Grin

tyedye · 25/04/2006 10:41

Hello themoon,well done for leaving the cava where it is,and jogging?!im too fat for jogging,thanks to ruddy beer!Its really nice to read the messages of support,"mums"locally would be aghast if they knew my alterego.ta everyone here!xx

themoon66 · 25/04/2006 10:55

I can sometimes manage not to drink for a whole week, but then it always seems to fall apart. I get scared when I think how many units I have in a week, so I tend to bury my head in the sand and just not think about it. I know its soooo bloody stupid and I dispair of myself. Its a relief to see I'm not the only though, after reading this thread.

butty · 25/04/2006 10:56

Can anyone join in this???

Hope so, i have for the last 2 years been constantly binge drinking and i so want to stopSad

I have a pretty rough time of things with both ds & dd, one with ODD and the other with SN, i always seem to use alcohol as the solution.

I don't actually drink in the house, instead i go out 2-3 times a week and on average drink around 7 pints as well as a few vodka redbulls.

My mum is constantly going on at the amount i drink as it is more than 3 times the reccomended for 1 week, of which i seem to do in one night. She's frightened that i am doing some real damage and is concerned about the state i get myself in.

Sat night, i went to the local at 9pm, didn't get home till 8.30amShock i didn't have the kids, so had a major bender and know full well that i drunk at least 13 pints!!

I really do want to stop, but when i'm out, i forget everything from home and let go, mainly to the extent where i forget the actual night out.

I keep saying that i'm only 24, now 25 and there is no real damage, but i now fear that 2 years on and 4 stone heavier, the damage is seriously happening alreadySad

sorry to rant, it's the second time i've opened up about my drinking and for the second time on MN.

Butty.xxx

tyedye · 25/04/2006 11:06

Hi Butty,reading about the disease of alcoholism,drinking patterns like you and i exhibit,mean that we are unable to drink"normally"ie we cant stop.
Have you spoken to your gp?Im 36 and STILL havent gained control DESPITE my family history!
I worry about cancer and cirrhosis and all sorts,to the point where i drink some more because im so effing stupid."Units" dont seem real,they are so unrelated to the quantity i put away!xxx

themoon66 · 25/04/2006 11:11

God you are so right about units being totally unrelated to what is actually going down your throat. I found some figures that show that an average bottle of wine is 9 units. Well I can drink one of them in an evening with ease, plus extra at weekends.

But what about hangovers? Do any of you suffer hangovers the next day? I never seem to do, which makes it even harder to stay off the drink.