This thread is so helpful. Thank you so much. I had severe acne right through my teens and twenties. In the end the doc offered roaccutane but he also said to me 'your acne is going away and I wouldn't advise it'. I think he was right, because the side effects can be dreadful, although I sometimes wish that I'd been prescribed in my teens when it was at its worst. And when I've had breakouts I've sometimes beaten myself up over not taking the Roaccutane. Your stories have given me hope that maybe I did make the right decision for me and I now feel proud that in my early twenties I was ok enough to say, beauty is more than skin deep.
At my worst, I was fortunate enough to pick up, by chance, an old copy of Spare Rib magazine, which contained the personal account of a woman who had not had acne til her late twenties. It was the first time I had ever read anyone talking about this and it made such a difference to me - just as reading this thread has done and will do for so many people. I recall one thing she said - that having skin problems feels like any other illness, and there are days when you want to hide under the duvet, or have nice things done to you; but all that is on offer are abrasive treatments and strong medications with bad side effects. As someone who could never remember having 'good' skin, I found that a revelation because she's right - we do punish ourselves and we're encouraged to do so.
What I took from that was the courage to stop using abrasive creams and instead to use moisturiser and things that made me feel nurtured. That isn't a solution if you're still living with acne, I know, or with many other skin complaints - my acne was disappearing at the time (don't know why). But using moisturiser made me realise that I have very sensitive skin and that many of the creams etc I'd been prescribed had made everything worse, not better.
What I have found hard for the last ten years is knowing what I look like. That's why I was still using the abrasive creams when I read that Spare Rib piece. I know I don't breakout like I used to but I just have no idea if I look acned, scarred, or 'normal', whatever that is. I know this is probably not a story that is very supportive of those of you brave women who are suffering with ongoing skin problems. I suppose I wanted to say that this does go on and on affecting us, through our lives, because the pain and stigma of having 'bad' skin is so horrendous, and the magazine portrayals of 'normal' skin are so ridiculous. But what's really helped me is listening to others because this is never talked about, and thank you for doing so.