Year 12 - 2025/2026: Support Thread 2

[QueenMabby]

A new thread for us to keep chatting on!

@NotDonnai don’t know whether to waste my last call to dvla or what to do. I’ve emailed gp surgery to say if I get more forms can they tell the gp the first lot weren’t completely filled in. The reply they will tell her when the forms arrive. Silly answer. Why not just pass on my email?

@icanbewhatiwant grrr I hate being piggy in the middle in situations like this! Did dvla return the forms to the GP highlighting where they’d missed? Otherwise it’s likely same mistakes will keep happening.

If you run out of phone calls - which seems odd to limit - write to them Complaints Team DVLA Swansea SA6 7JL.

We've had to do that a few times though harder when it could be GP as well at fault.

Last time was DD1 adult passport applied for on-line upgrade from child's - it was taking months and trip was getting closer - wrote as she was near exams. She got one phone call back and it was sorted - they'd transpose her date of birth wrong at some point but phoning didn't get us that information - it was then here couple of days later.

Our parents evening is not until June!! I initially thought we had one in Feb but turns out that is only if they have concerns about the student. I think it’s pretty poor, esp for those students doing competitive applications.

I decided to take matters into my own hands last term (when I thought we had a parents evening in Feb!) and gatecrashed the school’s sixth form open evening and just went to see DD’s teachers and have a quick chat with them. One was very happy to chat and agrees with me for coming, the other two seemed a bit surprised but I don’t really care about being seen as ‘that parent’.

DD’s school is a non-selective state school and although they get good results, I don’t feel they give the same level of support that she’d get from a private school, and I’ve never felt they had especially high expectations of her, so I make sure they know about her! I’m trying to encourage her to speak up more and have the confidence to advocate for herself. I’ve been told (by family, not teachers) that if I back off maybe she’ll step up, but my worry is that sixth form is such a short amount of time that she’ll miss out on opportunities if she doesn’t have the support.

With all the driving chat - can anyone recommend theory apps? DD is not 17 until July but she wants to take her test soon after her birthday to get it out of the way over the summer.

We had theory test 4 in 1 kit @SuperSue77

To pass as quickly as possible, automatic is much easier than manual driving.

DD’s friends revised together for the theory test and also shared some flash cards around. DD does everything her friends do. It looks like her uni course choice and the actual uni choices will be based on that too. She has been bestie friends focussed since nursery. I am just observing in amusement at this point.

My daughter passed theory last week she said the DVSA app was the best one for her. The 4 in 1 app explains the signs more in depth. Both have the same questions. Road sign flash cards were also good (her friend had them). She crammed the app for 6 hours in a weekend. I haven’t tried the scramble to get a test date yet.

4 in 1 app got DD a pass with 100% correct on the multichoice (not hazard perception) on the day

Apparently DVSA have blocked the Testi app for practical test dates.

Ds1 used the official app they send out a leaflet for with the provisional licence . He passed second attempt ( more by over clicking than anything else ) . He hadn’t even opened the many books I bought .

@BellaI recommend knowing exactly what you can do before logging on to book a test - if you stop to think or check your own availability the available tests will be gone in my experience

Four in one app was perfect for DD1 - she booked the test on Christmas day (finally focussed by her younger cousin passing) and then passed a month later with five minutes a day on the app.

Yes I think my older 2 had the 4 in 1 app.

As far as the rush to learn to drive goes I am just going to remind us all that life is a journey not a race. No one cares now who walked first.
My ds failed his first theory test despite getting most of the multi choice questions right. He had apparently not noticed the hazard awareness part of the app which he claimed was hidden 🤣
We also haven’t been able to get lessons yet as not many instructors work weekends and he is not home in daylight hours during the week.
At least the academic side seems to be going well, he is predicted straight A*s based on his December mocks.
The school (state sixth form) is also proving as excellent as it appeared at the open day. We had a parents evening in the first half term. We went in but also had the option of online. They do regular tests in class and feedback the results. Then as I said 1st mocks in December with predicted grades based on the results.

@RigbyRightyes agreed. It’s not a race. Ds’s friendship group are all September/October born. So getting near to driving tests. So he does feel left behind. Ds1 is a May birthday. He was the only one in 6th form left on the bus as the others were driving in before he was even 17. Ds2 was 17 during covid, so most couldn’t have lessons, it was so much better to have the pressure off as tests weren’t being taken, he was one of the oldest in the year, but it didn’t matter as only the ones who’s parents could take them out were learning. Whereas it does feel like ds3 is desperate to catch up.

Dd not started yet despite being a December birthday. Her licence application is stuck in the DVLA medical section with no timescale for processing. It’s a frustrating wait.

@icanbewhatiwant because we are in London precious few learn at all. Dd1 (18) is learning now because she needs it. Most of her friends haven’t.

Dd2 isn’t 17 til the end of July so we’re nowhere near- but as long as the ancient manual car holds out and dh’s patience does too he’ll be able to take her out as he has her sister. The discovery that you can insure learners by the hour with an app has been a game changer for us.

today has been a big day for dd2- she’s been to Cambridge to sing for the director of music at a big college. She’s been really poorly but managed to just about cope with singing a piece and doing some sightreading and he said he’d definitely consider an application from her as a choral scholar.

So she’s pleased but trying very hard to hold it all very lightly. It’s a rotten and lengthy process and I was terrified for her as she walked in but, as we said, if you don’t try you’ll never know!

@achangeofnameisasgoodasarest sorry about DD2s illness, but sounds as though it didn't affect her performance. And I never knew about insuring YP by the hour - we'll look into that! Though my DD isn't 17 until Jul either. She wants to get her licence so that if she gets into a med school that has far away placements, driving may be an option, but she doesn't plan to take the practical test until A levels are over.

@QueenMabby after I read your post I saw a post on faceook by our local MP saying one of the things she had done recently was get a constituents medical driving licence sorted when there had been a delay - so maybe your local MP might be an avenue if it continues to be delayed? Our MP is very active though, not sure sure if every MP would be interested in trying to help.

@QueenMabbyit sounds like your licence is in the same place as ours. Ds had a letter in the post Friday, dated the same date in early Jan as the one sent to the health centre. So hopefully they’ve received it. Goodness how long it will all take though.

@achangeofnameisasgoodasaresti think being in London is a good thing for learning. I hate the fact it’s a 45 min on a straight road to get to our nearest city, so that’s an hour and a half there and back in the instructors car at £40 an hour. Ds1 was at our nearest uni when ds2 had lessons, so I drove to the city and ds2 had 2 hours lessons in the city while I stayed with ds1 in his uni house. So that was useful. He said he learnt so much more in those 2 than he did driving from home.

I’ve not heard of insuring by the hour either. That would be helpful as ds1 and ds2 both have manual cars that ds3 could drive. Dh and I have automatics now.

Look at Veygo app - I’ve downloaded that for the insurance though there are others

Yep. Veygo is what we use too. It’s been excellent so far!

I have booked a test for 17 July in the nearest test centre. Joined the online queue at 5.50am and was sorted within about 20 minutes. There were 4000 in the queue when I joined! Not as bad as trying to buy concert tickets 😆
Good luck to those waiting to hear back from the DVLA.

Well done @BellaI - trying to get DD1 to just get on and book hers - she's just started her first nursing placements and it's a drive - she's relying on friends with similar shifts.

Now she knows her placement dates though she needs to get on with more lessons!

Some struggling here. DD had exams recently and her results weren't great. She's sending me texts saying she wants to drop out. I'm struggling. She's always found school easy but her GCSE results weren't quite as high as predicted (she did work very hard, it was like the exams threw her).

DD2 has some really bad results for maths and FM before christmas - she just sat mocks so will have to see how those went. She sitting AS exams in May 40% of final grade so she does need to start pulling things round.

DD1 struggled all way though A-levels and didn't do as well as expected but did get on her uni course and her course doesn't have written exams - and she's doing well. I think in hindsight we should have looked harder at Btec route for her.

CocoPlum I'd try and get her to talk things through with the teachers - or with you and the teachers. We just has a parent teacher meeting which was positive as was report more so than DD2 expected TBH.

Is it one or two poor tests knocking confidence or a pattern of not enjoying courses and struggling with all tests?

We have parents evening soon so we'll see ...

She says that when she's not in exam conditions, she's fine. In exams, it all goes out of her head.

She mostly enjoys it - but I think she wishes she hadn't taken English lit (I tried to warn her off it!). And she was thinking of a musical theatre btec but decided A levels was a better idea - so now I think she wishes she'd done that.

@CocoPlum I think the step up to A Levels can be a huge shock. My DD1, with hindsight, says she didn't enjoy them at all. She had all 7-9s at GCSE and we assumed she'd be fine - we were far too blithe about it, and she struggled. She is very much happier doing a nursing degree than she was with the A Levels.

I'm beyond proud hearing how she deals with the people on 'her' wards, though she has had to write a 2000 word essay as well.

But with your DD it might just be confidence as well - it is easy for that to get knocked at this stage because it's all a bit of a grind, the weather is crap, and the work is stepping up. Hope parents evening brings some clarity and cheer for you both.

DD2 seems mostly fine - but is perhaps not as focused on the A Levels as she might be. I've fought to get her taken out of a few ensembles after a week where she missed nearly all of her lessons for prom rehearsals. Suspect I'm down as 'that mum' but she does need to pass the A Levels. Some children in her school just do two (for conservatoire, which just requires two Es) but that won't suit her at all I think. And I just can't get my head round kids narrowing their options like that at 16.