Year 12 - 2024/25 - Support, Discussion and Looking After Each Other

[BlackBean2023]

A survival thread for Y12 parents (24/25) now that GCSEs are over and our young people move onto KS5

We are doing the same @Philandbill . We have four universities within an hour's drive and have encouraged DS to look at these in the summer irrespective of whether he is interested in them. He is also considering a gap year so that he can do a Maths A level as he's really enjoying Economics and if he wanted to study this at University he'd need A Level Maths.

DS' school have said not to go to open days until next summer (after their May mocks) so that that they can go with reasonable grade estimations. They will give up to 3 approved days off during the last half term of year 12 for this.

DS is earning some money this half term tennis coaching at a half term Kids club. It's finished by 3pm so he still has time to see his friends, go the gym and have some decent down time.

Hope your DC are enjoying half term so far.

Just caught up with the thread. Glad to see everyone settling in well.

It's been chaos here packing and moving and managing the building works. We are now temporarily living with the in-laws which means the kids have had to learn to commute by train. It also means all their extracurriculars have a long commute too, including on weekends.

DS has been struggling with being further away from his friends and his girlfriend. Especially as PIL's internet isn't great so it's harder to hang out online too.

However, he is enjoying lower sixth and his subjects, and even maths, which is less his thing but apparently can be a nice change from everything else that is essay-based.

No job hunting here (too complicated with the housing situation) but he's continuing his volunteering, and has also applied for and got a mentoring role at school.

He is very reluctant to start thinking about post-18 plans. He says he finds the decision making that would require very stressful.

Hope everyone is enjoying the half term.

things going ok here too. Dd seems to be making friends, and not just one over intense one, but several, so that is a huge step forward for her.

GCSE Enlgish resits next week. Thought she was doing really well and being quite chill about them, but she had a meltdown last night over pizzas!
She has a youth group weekend at church this weekend and has (much to my relief) decided to come home each night and sleep, which is good news.

Someone mentioned uni open days. dd is planning to apply for an intern year with our church between school and uni, which I am really pleased about, as I don't think she will cope well with uni entrance and A levels and also she needs a bit longer before flying the nest.

I do hope the English retake goes well for your DD @steppemum

Good luck to all DC taking retakes soon - you can do this!

Good luck to your DD next week @steppemum really hope she gets a positive outcome. Same wishes to anyone else's DC retaking.

Is anyone else’s teen having a wobble?
dd is very bright with an excellent work ethic- sailed through gcse really with wonderful results.
She has already changed one subject to English lit and she was initially really enthusiastic as she is an avid reader and loves analysing books. However she’s now thinking it was a mistake. Chatting to her it’s a confidence thing- I think she’s struggling a little and saying how difficult it is as an a level. I’ve said it’s usual to feel this way and that it’s a big step up after gcse. She seems to have lost her way and not really doing any work at home (this is really unusual). She isn’t that keen on her other choice either.
is this usual at this point in the year? It’s a long, long time since I did mine!

@Teadrinker81 I think this is a very understandable time for a wobble. All the certainties of GCSE, when they got to pick a few options but largely stuff was decided for them, are in the past. At sixth form level they have the opportunity (or tyranny) of real choice - and OMG what if they have got it wrong and they’re going to do really badly and it’s all their own fault and it’s going to ruin their whole life???

Does she have a pastoral tutor she can chat with? Has she had grades/marks back that you can reassure her with? She is clearly very capable, so probably just needs the adults around her to steady her a bit.

Edited: as you are clearly doing!

You’ve summed her up perfectly! That’s exactly what I think is going on in her mind. Doesn’t help that she’s a good all rounder so the decision has been her own where I was only good at humanities so the decision was made for me!
I will suggest she speak to her tutor- thank you and she got c grades in her recent assessments which I think she was disappointed in but I suggested she can’t go straight to a grades in a few weeks.

My son is also having a wobble after having four assessments (one in each subject) sprung on him with a few days notice just before half term. He then had to wait til school started again for the results and hasn't had his maths or FM results back yet and didn't feel as confident as he's used to when doing the assessments. He said he is worried they'll tell him he's unsuitable for the course. He isn't used to finding things tricky or having to work hard on something so FM in particular has been a bit of a bump down to earth I think!

His physics and comp sci results were fine so hopefully he will feel better once he gets the maths ones.

I think it's a huge information overload, step up in work difficulty and less feedback / hand holding that's making him feel a bit worried. Perfectly normal I think (hope) 🙂

Yes I really think she is so used to working hard but finding it easy and she got lots of motivation from doing well. I suspect the relationship with the teachers is very different as well. I don’t think there’s as much positive reinforcement and praise! 🙈😊 I keep saying I don’t get told well done at work when I do something.
Hope things improve quickly for your son Techno56.

Going through the same, after very good GCSE results and calm exams, now worried about Chem. came home crying one day, as the chem class test went bad.
now IG started showing me MyEdSpace, lots of google reviews, but I can’t see many posts about it here on MN ( my first port for reviews on anything in life 😬) Please let me know if anyone has used/know about them. I also told her not to worry and if it gets too much, we can drop Chem at AS. But that again would cause much stress, DD is not very good at admitting defeat 😢
Compared to £60 ph elsewhere, I really want to give it a go.

English resits done, both exams went well!!!
(although she lost confidence after coming out and talking to the teacher after paper 1) still, she wrote 6 pages which is probably 5 and half more than in the summer.

Such a relief. And finally found a driving teacher because she has a free afternoon with no English lesson! So birthdya this weekend and first lesson next week

@steppemum That’s brilliant news! Perfect timing to get that over with and celebrate her birthday. Hope she enjoys her first driving lesson too 🚗

@Newlease That sounds tough, but is it perhaps worth having a chat with the Chemistry teacher(s) before shelling out for tutoring?

does school offer any support? Dds school has a drop in for Chem and maths once a week if they need extra help or help with homework.
It is a very effective system, and dd does her maths homework at the drop in most weeks, even though she can do maths.

I do think there has been a jump up in levels and dd at times is wanting her hand held more and struggling with the independence expected.

My dd had a real wobble early on in maths, I do think it's to be expected, its a big step up, but now she seems calm about it. She found that there were topics that most students felt fine with that she found tricky, but also topics she was quite able to do that some others found hard, so she's feeling overall she is not the weakest and will probably do well enough. The maths department have a policy of seating plans and she's upset this half term to have been moved away from a very bright and lovely girl to sit next to a boy who is struggling even more than she is. I found in A-levels that being friends with the clever students was super helpful - I have a nerdy personality, but I'm only averagely intelligent I think.

Actually she had originally wanted Spanish and was very sure about it, but during taster lessons in the summer decided it was much harder and she felt she didn't love it enough to carry on with it. She opted for economics instead and actually that is by far her favourite subject and one she thinks she will do at uni. It is very hard to make such narrow choices at such a young age.

17th birthday today. We brought her car down from my DSIL, or rather I did, like an absolute twat I have managed to prang it while driving on the motorway, I was in lane 2, the person I was overtaking in lane 1 started pulling over towards me, I swerved into lane 3 and clipped another car. It's driveable, needs a new wing mirror and has quite the scratch down the drivers door. I feel like such a knob though. DD has been very understanding.

I don’t think they do for A Levels, DD helps with maths and other subjects for Year 10 and 11 drop ins, but thanks for suggesting that, I will ask her.
There is talk that the Chem dept is very strict and the predicted grades are not very good, so I think all these emotions are stemming from worries about future. So many kids chose other subjects just because of that, according to DD.
Never had dislike on Chem while in GCSE, all writing subjects were the problem areas then. She can’t drop Chem with out dropping Further Maths, so there was not much choice either.
@JessyCarr I have never done that before, but probably worth emailing. I never know what to ask,especially since staring secondary. normally listen to everything they say. And we have report/parents meeting coming up, so would be the good time to talk about it.

BTW, DD joined Lamda, for public speaking and very happy with it. And CCF going well as well, now that they are talking responsibility and on learning towards officer post, gets more interesting.
@wonderstuff oh no!! That sounds like an eventful day, hope it was not very scary. And we were discussing seating plans over dinner. DD said she had not been able to sit next to her BFF since the start because of seating plan and today she was glad as together they work a lot faster!! I don’t know what basis they arrange seats. Not like primary with different sets of grades, for sure?

And happy Birthdays to kids turning 17 this week @wonderstuff and @steppemum . Good Luck with driving lessons. A year and half and they will be in uni, proud and sad at the same time 😞

Gosh @wonderstuff - you make light of it, but that must have been a scary moment on the motorway. I am glad you are unscathed, even if the car isn’t! Happy birthday to your DD 🎈

I wonder who will be the first DC on the thread to pass their driving test? DD had an early start on the lessons due to being one of the oldest in the cohort, but had had to pause her driving while we checked out some health concerns (unexplained fainting). Anyway she’s fine, but we will push her test date off for a bit and look forward to congratulating whoever is first to throw away the “L” plates!

In an unexpected development, I found today…a rough draft of some text for DD’s UCAS personal statement! She really is champing at the bit to go to uni. Eeek.

Happy birthday to those turning 17 this week!

ds2’s birthday isn’t for another 7 months! The first of his friends has their driving test today, I have to say that I really dislike this stage of parenting - it’s a huge step them passing their driving tests but it feels even bigger letting your own dc out in a car with their friends.

i’ve only just got over it with ds1 and am not relishing having to go through it again.

I hope you are okay @wonderstuff that must have been very scary.

We have problems with getting driving tests in my area. People are applying all over the country. The brother of one of DS' friends had his test in Leeds and another sibling in Devon (we are in Berkshire). I hope your DC find getting a local test easier.

DS is 17 next month but doesn't want to learn to drive until the Spring. That's fine by me. We'll have to get a car before he can start as ours are both automatics and he wants to pass in a manual.

I'm pleased that your DD found the English retake better than the summer @steppemum - that bodes well for a positive outcome.

Happy birthday to those with birthdays this week - enjoy being 17!

DS has a careers thing on Monday after school. A selection of "old boys" who are in the legal profession are coming in to talk to those interested about legal careers and pathways. Should be interesting for DS who still has no idea what he wants to do for a living.

@steppemum fingers crossed she gets what she needs in English.
@Techno56 hope your son had good results and is feeling more confident
Happy 17th birthday to any November kids.
@wonderstuff Good to hear your OK

Hubby and DS going car shopping for an old banger tomorrow thought I had a instructor lined up for this week but he went quiet after chasing got message to say he is busy with tests this week and last couple of weeks but will be in touch not impressed as wasted a few months when could have asked other instructors.

Morning all, nice to read what you have all been up to.

Great that your DD found the resit ok @steppemum , when do they get results?

@Teadrinker81 my DD had wobbles just after she started in Sept and we did have tears over whether she could do biology, she demanded I find a tutor, which i did make initial enquiries about but she has talked to her teachers and I think has accepted different teaching styles are normal and it is ok if she doesn't understand something first time. She hasn't mentioned tutoring since and got good grades in all her tests just prior to half term so I am keeping quiet on this for now. I think they need time to adjust to the challenge of A level, even those who were high achieving at GCSE. My DD was one of these and it was only when she could prove to herself (and her new teachers) that she is capable that she has settled more.

DD isn't 17 until April so no driving lessons to worry about yet. We were going to have to get her a car though as only got automatics atm. But we had a word about the cost of running it and asked her to contribute to the insurance. She has a job and lots of savings, but she is very tight fisted and doesn't want to spend her own money on a car!! 😂. So we are going to swap one of ours to a 1L manual and she can share ours until she goes to uni and see what she needs then.

DDs school are giving students minimum expected grades soon, then predicted grades later in y12. They had it drummed in that they are 'minimum' and they will be expected to try and exceed these. I think she will get 3 As which doesn't leave much room to exceed, so hoping it won't put too much pressure on her. She is loving her subjects still though and throwing herself into mentoring and helping with open evenings etc. She has also a week of work experience lined up at the hospital I work at next year which will be convenient for travelling. There is so much for them to do it is mind blowing how they keep on top of it all!

Happy 17th birthday to those celebrating this week!

Thanks for all the good wishes.
birthday went well, a couple of friends, pizza and dvds followed by cinema Sat morning. Very quiet for 17th, but she was happy.

Dd will be on our car insurance soon, but we didn't get it in time for birthday. So first lesson on Thursday. 2 hour beginner lesson for price of one hour. I'm praying it goes well and she like the instructor, so that we can book a set of 10.

No joy with car shopping so still searching also started looking for new instructor as one I had been in touch with is now not replying guess he has more than enough students to teach to drive.