Y12 2023/24 - support, discussion and looking after each other

[BonjourCrisette]

GCSEs are over and we are beginning the next stage. Let's hope it's a bit less stressful than this summer has been! All welcome to discuss, share experiences and support each other as our children move into Y12/BTECs/apprenticeships and start a new phase.

Thanks @spiderlight and @SummerChilling .
Dds always loved cars. I have a photo of her age 2 in overalls and wooly hat passing her dad spanners. Which she could name!
She's loving the practical stuff. Not sure when the written stuff starts but it will consist of an afternoon a week shut in a room with college by zoom. She'll hate it.
Come May she will be expected to attend the college every 6 weeks for 3 days. College is 3 hours away. She will be taken, put up in a hotel, transported to college each day and brought back. She'll love this. I'm dreading it. She will be only just 17 in a city where she knows noone , with much older people.
Sorry to hear some people's kids are having rough starts. Hoping for smoother days ahead.

Ds up and getting ready to leave for his induction day today. Don't think he's seen this tike of day for weeks!!

Thanks all, he's up but very anxious so im mot sure how today will go. He doesn't have a Lanyard yet which is what triggered it all as he can't get in to 6th Form without one. I'm hoping they get it sorted today.

DS1 and DS3 both have EHCPs, and I've done and won appeals etc. I think what DS2 really needs is medication, but CAMHS are insisting he needs more counselling before they'll refer to psychiatry. I'm going to try and push it again and my GP amd see if they'll budge on it now he's 16 and the size of an adult.

It seems there were low results across the board for the school, and Art in particular has a group of parents trying to escalate complaints. Whilst this is all horrible for the young people, DS2 is at least not alone in not achieving expected grades. Misery loves conpany(!)

@Sadtimes1 post on SN Chat, you'll get good advice there on the EHCP process.

Here's to good starts/days for all.

@PennywisePoundFoolish Thank you. I was told at almost the end of school that I should get one for my other DS. After so many years of struggling with him and school, I took my foot off the gas and didn’t do it in the end. It feels like a constant battle for everything 😞. When I asked the school about an EHCP for this DS, I was told that he wouldn’t be accepted as he needs multiple conditions not just severe dyslexia.
Was the Art OCR? Out of all the GCSE’s that was my DS’s lowest mark and the one he was most disappointed in but the teacher wasn’t the best. I am not sure much can be done though.
Good luck to all today! Both my DS’s are going to 6th form/college today.

@PennywisePoundFoolish
My DD had what she deemed 'a breakdown' in the evening after her first proper day on Tuesday, and she had only had two lessons that day!
Having been so keen to not go back to her school 6th form and go to college instead so she could make a fresh start and make new friends etc. (also her school doesn't do the subjects/combinations she wanted either so..). But no one she knows chose to go to her college...

She had a total wobble and said she was missing her old friends (even though non of them were really good friends) and "everyone" was at her old school and had she made the right decision...and it was scary and new and she just needed a big hug ...
I showed her how I had been "stalking" 😂 her on Find my Phone app and had taken screenshots and that I had also been a nervous wreck wondering how she was getting on and whether she was making friends etc. She was happier by the end of the sobfest (both of us!) and went in much happier yesterday.

Day 3 today, didn't manage to get herself ready for the train she should be catching for 9am start ...so I drove her in again 🤨 but spotted two Psychology new friends at the entrance and dashed off to join them!
Fingers crossed it will continue to get easier for all.
😀😅🤞🏻

DS has visibly relaxed two days into sixth form and seems to be enjoying the new level of freedom. Hope everyone else settles in to what they're doing soon.

Day two here. First proper lessons today. Seems to have been a success so far with tutorial sessions, getting familiar with the campus and making friends.

Feeling a bit more relaxed about the cost aspect because most days either allow for breakfast/brunch at home or like today there was a class first thing then a gap of 3 hours until afternoon lessons. So DS came home for lunch. It's not far and the bus stop is opposite college so perfectly doable. I don't think he'll be spending as much on food as I thought.

Ds is feeling very smug. Apparently English A-level has been set homework. he hasn't. And he has last period free tomorrow afternoon. He thinks life is good. 😂

Much better day for DS2. He has his Lanyard so that's a big source of angst dealt with. He's had 2 lots of homework already and got 2 more today. The 6th formers tend to stay onsite and do theirs, I'm picking him up this week but hopefully he'll get into a routine next week when he's get the train home . He could get the school bus but hates it.

DD is getting on OK. We got some noise reducing ear plugs, which she hasn't needed but feels better to have just in case. Most subjects seem fine but so far she hates politics which has been a bit dry and fact-based (she's mainly hoping for lots of debate from this). Crossing fingers that things improve! If not, she can drop it at the end of the year.

DD went into college for induction this afternoon. Said her tutor seems nice and chatted to a few other kids.

She’s a bit grumpy as she’s had some kind of maths added to her courses. Not a GCSE resit as she got a 4. She’s not really too sure what it is, but I’m trying to convince her it’s probably useful.

Blazer update- turned up in changing room today so had obviously gone home in the wrong PE bag on Tuesday..( names tapes will be sown in)
She’s really enjoying all her subjects including the one she had a wobble about as did worse than expected.

M dd is just excited to buy several new nail polish colours and try them out every day 🤣she loves the freedom college is giving at the moment. She is actually very self motivated so I’m hopeful she’ll get into a rhythm with it all. But she did nip to Primark before catching the train home today, spending her own money though from her p/t job not mine!

DS has three hours of maths tomorrow! What a Friday treat for him...

My dd has struggled a little today. The Year 13s are being quite unpleasant to them in the common room, claiming tables as 'theirs' and whatnot, and I think she's missing the people that have left. It's been a much bigger change than she (or I, I LOVED sixth form) expected, I think. Hoping she settles in a week or two.

DS had his first induction day at college today. All seems ok. He got his timetable. There's A LOT of 'free' time. He has one lesson on a Wednesday from 9-10.15. That's it. And I can't see him using the rest of the day to study.

Ds had a bit of a grump today when I suggested he might do some school work as he came home at 1, did not go down well. He is using free time to go to the gym. He has every second Wednesday off and one week he has very few lessons and the next is busier. They have to be In every day for morning form but can leave after lessons. He is very proud of his swipe card that lets him out of the school site! It is a bit of a nightmare not having transport but good if i can pick him up during my lunch break.

Induction seems to have gone well for DD, but there are 30 people in her art class, which is far from ideal. She's made some new friends and they sound nice. There are quite a few international students at the college and they've been having some interesting conversations about their different school systems.

DS2 is unimpressed he has compulsory PSHE on his timetable. He's got off lightly compared to previous years where they timetabled PE into 6th Form. He does at least finish early every Friday.

I've signed the off-site consent form so he is free to wander in his free periods,but I cannot be picking him up and dropping off when I'm on nights, which he understands.

Bit annoyed after today. My ds said a teacher at college went around the class she had for induction and asked to look at their gcse results and said to my son she's writing him on the list as he only has a 4 in Maths. It says online that he has been accepted and I even rang up to confirm and that's the case. He also has a timetable.
Online it states for his A levels he's doing 5gcses grade 4 and above with a 6 in that subject and he has that.
So he's been anxious now he's going to be kicked off rhe course. Why would she go around all the students like that when they've already been accepted!?

DD had a bit of a meltdown at lunchtime today - she suffers terribly with social anxiety (from being bullied lower down school). She found herself completely alone at lunchtime and felt overwhelmed by the fact she has no friends in her new setting. They have literally done 2 x half days and a full day today, though she was sent home due to being overwrought, so next to no time to make new friends in!

Not sure what the solution is but I'm encouraging her to stick with it. Hoping things improve over the next week or so. She is enjoying the course, though!

Just checking in. Good to hear of so many positive and upbeat starts. I hope things improve for those that are finding it harder or have stuff to iron out. Even when it's going well (which it is for DD so far), it feels like a lot.

Main thing which we knew, but is still a bit of a jolt to see it happening, is how long a day it is. DD left the house at 7.45 this morning and got home just after 6pm. School was only 10-15 minute walk, so it's quite a change. But broadly she is excited and positive and enjoying meeting all the new people and finding her feet.

Sorry to hear about your DD. Positive side is that she is enjoying the course. Hope she will make friends as time passes. Wish you and DD the best.

I know everyone always says this but are there clubs at lunchtime? It really is the easiest way in. At least then she is with other people who she may click with if she can find something she is interested in. She just needs to find one or two people who she can get lunch with etc to start with and hopefully it will sort itself out in time.

If she really can't find a club, tell her to either find people she knows from tutor group or classes and ask to go to lunch with them/sit with them in common room or use her free time to do homework. I know it's hard but there must be someone there who can become a friend. She just needs to find them and the only way to do that is to meet as many people as she possibly can until someone clicks.

She probably also needs to try not to talk negatively to herself or catastrophise but I know this is easier said than done. She should also access any counselling/pastoral care available at her school or college and tell them about her social anxiety and ask for help.

Very best of luck.

@beansoup I hope she gets on OK today. My goddaughter has also just started 6th form and had a similar experience yesterday. One of the things I/we said to her is that we think it'll be easier in a few days once the work is more of a thing than the 'new starting', if that makes sense. I think they all feel very on display and under pressure to connect as first. The fact she is enjoying the lessons will hopefully help.

Almost the end of the week for them all!