Oh my wooly word!

[SquidgyBrain]

Have just been called and told there is a little boy possibly being taken into care tonight. So waiting on a phone call. EEEEEKK!!

is your DH home to help yet????

I hope it's going well for you, things are going smoothly over here, though I'm not finding the time to do much housework - there's always something better to do instead!

Thinking of you x

No DH was supposed to be out till Wednesday.

But he has just told me that he is coming home tomorrow night :) so I will actually get to see him on our wedding anniversary :O)

Things are going really well, he is a easy baby really. I Have just had to be strict with myself and when I have him busy eating fingerfood in the high chair get some house work done ect :)

Hows the sleeping going??

x

He's slept until 7.30am Sat and Sun, but 6.30 again today, which is still ok. Mind you he's been poorly

Hope you have a lovely night tonight x

AWH - hoping poorly bub feels better soon

thanks - I am really looking forwards to seeing him :)

x

Had the LO's reception into care meeting today.

It went really well, The parents are taking responsibility for their actions and the hope is the LO will be going home soon (Hopefully before Christmas if all goes well)

happy days x

hoping everyone else is doing well x

I'm glad it's all going so well. xx

I am so disappointed, as part of LO contact his SW wants Mum and LO to attend a mother and toddler group os that they get out and about and meet other people and get some parenting skills (It is a LA run group)

And Mum didn't turn up :( LO own SW had said if Mum wasn't there at 10 when it started we had to leave straight away, the supervising SW said that she could have to 10.10 and I faffed about for another 5 mins, and still no sign. This was one of the things that they had tasked the parents at yesterdays meeting was to be on time for appointments. I could understand her being late for other appointments but not to see her son. So that is it for contact till next Monday

So after feeling positive for the family yesterday I can see us being the ones that get to spend his first birthday and christmas with him :(

Your heart bleeds for them doesn't it.
Our fc mother didn't turn up to their medical either, and left me guessing their family history......

Speak more later x

Aw that is sad. :(. xx

Well it seems that LO's mum simply slept in :(

She wasn't due to see him until Monday, but LO has gotten sick (upper airway thing) so I wanted him to be seen by a GP today, and she attended the appointment.

other than that things are good - :)

hows everyone else?

We good here.. kids full of colds & coughs but still happy as Larry (whoever larry is!!).

Mum really made an effort this week, and I know how you feel squidy, that you are hoping the parents come good, and then feel really gutted when they have a blip..

Its such an emotional journey that we find ourselves on, both for ourselves and for the LO's.. its been confirmed they're with us until at least the new year, so I'm looking forward to doing some Christmas Toy shopping - our LA gives us around £150 per child so what fun I can have during contact sessions!!

We have even been given some tickets to the big panto - 7pm start so not sure how that will go down with the LO's - they're normally in bed for that time - still, worst case they fall asleep or scream!!

Hope you enjoying it and not having too many 'OMG what have I done moments' now!!

Here's to us putting our feet up, watching Corrie with a glass of wine!!

Glad to hear it is going well :)

I totally agree about the emotional ups and downs - but actually not having any OMG moments at the minute - but I am sure those will come again.

I was discussing out LOs birthday we also get about £150ish for birthdays and Christmas, haven't brought up the Christmas one yet, but have asked if there is anything that she can think that LO needs.

I am not confident enough that I won't need to get some more medical attention for the little one so shall have to give the wine a miss....booo! Hope you enjoy yours :)

We're good too! Our baby has slept through the night, for, wait for it..... the last four nights!!!! It's bliss!!

I'm also pleased to report that I haven't had any OMG moments recently. Sleep makes things a lot easier

In our LA we get an extra week's boarding out for each child at Christmas, which is something like £125 for baby, £140 for 5yr old.

What to buy, what to buy???? I don't want to duplicate things that they'll get from grandparents and Mother.

I'm enjoying a take away, a beer and children in need at the mo, but will change over to watch the Mentalist at nine.
Have a good night all x

Fantastic news that the LO is sleeping :)

Yeah that is the same for us - I checked the amount last night and it is £126 for our LO of birthday and then the same for Christmas. I have just read my last post and it doesn't make much sense - I was trying to say that I had spoken to LO's mum and asked her if there is anything they need or would like for the LO.

Hoping you enjoyed your night:)

x

Another day, another let down :(

LO's parents broke the terms of contact and their for contact was cancelled. I did phone and question the decision, as LO hasn't had contact with them since last Wednesday, apart from the quick Dr appointment on Friday, The social worker did stick to her guns and not allow them contact. We did have quite a long discussion, and after I came off the phone I felt like I had stepped over the line, I did speak to the SW later and I did offer an apology and she was very lovely about it, and told me that I had every right to question her decision, and she hadn't given the matter a second thought.

I guess all us newbie foster carers need to learn the ropes, and I seem to be dealing with some masters in playing the system with LO's parents

Still gutted for the LO that his parents are just not stepping up to the plate :(

Morning..

I've had things like you mention - and I feel at times its like the SW is being awkward and bloody minded just for the sake of it...

then I think well, hey, the parents have agreed to do certain things at certain times, and if they don't keep to their side of the deal, then they only have themselves to blame - and like our SW said, its not commitment to the SW they are looking for, its to the child..

It is the child that suffers, and both parties at times appear to be the cause of it - and as we only want what is best for the LO - I find it hard at times to accept some of the 'rules' and 'decisions' - I even offered to the SW to go and collect Mum at one time (fool that I am!!) - I now realise that this would have made it too easy for her and sent all the wrong signals...

After what I feel was a good contact week last week, I'm sat waiting for the phone to ring today to see if she keeps up the good work, but dreading it not happening..

Ups and downs eh??

p99 - it is actually the second most important think for them to turn up to appointments/meetings on time as they have a shocking record, so I can totally see that by allowing them to have access when they have broken the contract then it doesn't really teach them anything other than they can do what they like and still have access, which isn't really a good plan I guess.

The LO doesn't actually seem bothered at all to be here - doesn't get either excited when seeing his parents or upset when they leave, totally no reaction at all, so It does seem that he's not really fussed if he gets contact with them or not - which is a bit sad really, considering he has been at home since he was 3.5 months old or there abouts (he is now 11 months)

I guess we shall see what tomorrow brings I will be reminding them of the time ect when/if they phone tonight, then they have no blinking excuse. Actually I am going to text them (on my brand new pay as you go phone that I bought exactly for things like this) and then I will have the evidence if they don't turn up, although it is in the afternoon, so they normally can drag themselves out of bed by then.........

Well did your Mum turn up for contact today??

She did actually.. just as I'd given up - 20 minutes late - so by the time I got to the centre, she had just about 1hr 30 mins with them.. still, better late than never...

Like your LO, ours don't seem bothered - I think they look forward to the toys more than seeing her - the older one never asks for her (yet all the time asks where my hubby is) - nor gets excited when they see her, and cling to me, and do look excited when I arrive to collect...

Its so strange and I'm still getting used to these raging emotions that I feel, and change from hour to hour!! Then again, I am a woman!!

I was told not to contact mum by phone/text about contact - like you, I think it would be easier than sat here with coats on waiting for the call (not exactly but not far off!!), but I have to remember that the parents aren't my problem and have to leave them to the SW... just a thought for you to mull over...

Anyway.. sounds like you'll have to cook extra Xmas dinner and have an extra lump in your throat when its pressie opening time...

Have a fab night and fingers crossed for us both tomorrow.

Na night x x x

Urgh - glad that it is not just my LO's parents that seem happy to let them down - 20 minutes late for a 2 hour contact that is ridiculous :(

I am in a different situation that I have been actively encouraged to befriend mum as she needs a friend - although they haven't phoned here today so I am miffed at them and have decided to leave things alone tonight - will speak to their SW tomorrow.

Hoping you sleep well :)

catch up tomorrow xx

Hi y'all. Our LO are taken to supervised contact by support workers twice a week, and Monday, the support worker didn't turn up :(

I got a call from the school and the childminder to collect both, but luckily I was about and wasn't rushing around for my own two.
How embarrassing for the service and unprofessional - their manager phoned three times that afternoon to apologize and rearrange for them.

Hope all is well with you x

Urgh SSM that is shocking :(

Things are going OK, it is becoming really apparent that the LO isn't actually attached to him Mum which is so so sad. Where they are planning to move on from this I have no idea and having a meeting with the Lo's social worker next week so I am hoping to get a clearer view from her what she thinks is going to happen.

Wouldn't it be nice to have a crystal ball

Isn't it lovely to have this forum to be able to chat :)

thank ladies for all your support

x

Hiya SSM - I've had that too... and once they turned up at the wrong time and phoned to say mum hadn't turned up - when really it was scheduled for 2 hours later!!

We've had letters with the childrens names completely wrong - not mis-spelt, but obviously using a letter for another child and not replacing the name.. all sorts of stuff...

I try and give them the benefit of the doubt in that they're all so busy - but if I'd had been the parent receiving the letter I'd have hit the roof!!

Squidgy - I agree - you guys are my sanity!!

Isn't it interesting tho that when the SW's are busy or not doing things to the letter we give them the benefit of the doubt and say - oh they are over worked, yet I was pulled up this week as the LO went to contact with a mucky face (he has a cold and DH didn't wipe it immediately before he gave him to the SW collecting him, then they thought I had sent him to contact in his PJ's - it was a romper or day suit - but the parents had been using it as PJ's and the social worker claims that she told me he was in his PJ's when she dropped him off (she didn't as I knew it was a romper suit and would have brought it up then) not surprising I didn't get an apology from the SW when I told her that the suit had in red lettering on the label not suitable for sleepwear on it.........yet when I asked her if I was still waiting on paper work (had given her a weeks grace from the deadline that was passed at the meeting last week) she became really snotty with me and told me that all the information I needed was in the A4 sheet she has scrawled (sorry written) the night he arrived.

I wouldn't have gotten so wound up about it but the child apart from his face and nose was spotless and his clothes freshly washed and ironed, isn't it funny how they home in on one area and then make you feel like an unfit parent for it.

They also were snippy about his nappy rash. I had told mum the day before that it was looking much redder but it wasn't bothering him and he wasn't in pain from it, but it was needing kept an eye on - next day as part of the dressing down his nappy rash was brought up as well, I explained that he is teething, he's been on antibiotics but he wasn't in any pain and none of the skin had broken down, but I was told it obviously needed seeing to and prescription cream - he was seen by his GP - and YUP he didn't need any cream and what I was doing was exactly right!

I don't pretend to the be the best mum out there, and yes my kids faces are not always the cleanest - but they are all loved and played with, well fed and happy

EEEK that turned into a little bit of a rant! - sorry ladies but thanks for letting me get it off my chest!

Blimey Squidgy, I don't like the sound of your social worker, she's meant to be on your side!

At least you know we're on your side chuck, we've never claimed to be perfect have we, we're normal people who like putting kids first.

Don't let it get you down, and rant away!

oh this was the LO's SW, mine has been on holiday since the day before the LO arrived!

I probably have taken it all too personally, but I really do think that if they have the time to "mention" a face that could do with a quick wipe, and bring up how I have dressed the LO - when I have dressed him in an outfit that his parents sent him in - as they have in error thought it was day wear, and to question my decision (I am a qualified paediatric nurse) on wither his bottom needs a prescription cream then she really should have time to get me the paper work that is supposed to be given to me when she brought the little one - or in the next couple of days......it's been 15 days now.....

I guess it has given me a small insight into how the parents must feel when every minute detail is taken into account.

Still one dirty face in 15 days seems a small detail to pick up on LOL