I know its early but... what shall i wear to my first xmas ball

[SandyChick]

Hello, This year will be my first Christmas ball. Is a ball gown expected? I dont want to look like a bridesmaid.

Im only 5ft 2" so i tend to look swamped in long dresses.

Depends on what 'rules' your mess have!!

At our mess ladies can wear anything from a simple dress that is below the knee to full on bridesmaid dresses, but shoulders must be covered until after the meal.

I normally go for something inbetween an evening dress and a ball gown.

Im not sure on the 'rules'.

After speaking to a few friends i get the impression that as long as its below the knee its fine.

The wives i know are also forces so they tend to wear mess dress.

I was thinking of something alon these lines?

Im not sure on the 'rules'.

After speaking to a few friends i get the impression that as long as its below the knee its fine.

The wives i know are also forces so they tend to wear mess dress.

I was thinking of something alon these lines?

That dress would be fine, its similar to what i would wear. I normally go for black and add some 'bling'!!

Very nice! You can (in this day and age) wear more or less what you like - long, short, strapless, backless - as long as it looks like evening wear - fabric, style etc.

I normally go to Monsoon or House of Fraser to find a ball dress. I got a Caroline Charles set of separates in Navy velvet (long skirt, top and wide legged trousers) in a posh preloved clothes shop once and wore the top and skirt to the Christmas dance at Drake.

Being vertically challenged like you, I also go for lacy 'ethnic' dresses with a silk jacket over them on the grounds that whilst it may be calf length on the rest of the planet it's floor length on me..or indiany trousers and tunic to look like a shalwar khameez.

Try to avoid black as every other bugger will be wearing it. Wear something to stand out against and offset the messkit, rather than disappear against it.

That dress is nice but I'm 32 and would feel it was too 'old' for me tbh. I tend to wear something mid-calf length (I'm slightly shorter than you) and in a younger style. Usually from Monsoon or Coast.

You are all so posh - with your shawls and shoulders being covered

LL, I've never been caught out with the same dress as someone else- but I like to think that's because I have more style than most of them . Also, all of my monsoon/coast stuff is 'vintage' ie always bought in the previous new year sale .

plan a- lose weight and get into the dress my sister wore to my wedding.

plan b- lose weight and wear a dress that a friend wore a few years ago (hopefully everyone forgets she wore it)

plan c- lose weight and wear that dress you linked first (dont think we will be at the same ball so should be fine )

and you must have a shawl, make you feel all grown up and posh

My one and only Monsoon number is 1986 vintage - my first black tie function!

It still hangs in my wardrobe - fond memories!

Message withdrawn

Hi Sandy, no new advice to add but would agree with all above. The dress is gorgeous, if you go for black add colour with a wrap (in all the messes I've been to shoulders have to covered until after the meal). Or go for a colour.

I've got some Monsoon and never come across anyone wearing the same dress as me. The other good place to try is Debenhams - the designer collections. I have a gorgeous Jasper Conran that I got in the sales a couple of years ago. A friend of mine always buys a couple of Monsoon dresses in the January sales, then she gets two for the price of one - a tip for building your dressing-up wardrobe!!

Have fun shopping

Agree with all the advice on here, buy your dress early then you won't have the same one as everyone else!! Where we were before there was a Monsoon close by and everyone rushed there the week before the ball (last minute after weeks of weight watcher ). My only tip for your first ball is take a little shoe bag or something and hang it up in the ladies with hairspray, brush, flip flops, make up etc then you won't have to wrestle the other ladies for the hairspray and you will have some comfy shoes to walk home in when you are ratarsed tired at the end of the night.

PS the dress is lovely!

plan d- lose weight and buy it in red

Now we have been invited to a Formal Dinner (Mess Dress) in October! This will be my first dinner as Mrs CO!

What shall I wear??

I am great for dishing out advice but have just realised my wardrobe needs updating in that department.

Apart from Monsoon/Coast etc where else is there?? I like quite elegant things - no frou frou please!

I've normally gone to Debenhams or John Lewis or Frasers for mess do dresses (and coast when I can afford it but £££££'s!. My tip is to go with what you're comfortable with. I normally stick to long and more subdued for dinners and for xmas ball go a bit more sparkly. TBH it depends on how stuffy relaxed the mess is. Ours doesn't worry too much about shoulders being covered but above the knee is definately not advisable!

another new thing I tried was buy a long black skirt last year which meant I could just buy a new top from coast this year.

Why don't you try local wedding dress shops, as there are some really beautiful bridesmaids dresses, and you can probably guarantee that no-one else will have the same!