Help me compose a snotty letter to nursery about their crappy meals

[Moomin]

Can you tell I've got a cob on tonight?! So I need to channel my rage positively and do what I've been threatening for a while - write a letter to nursery about their meals.

The nursery itself is excellent and the staff are fab. Dd has been going there 2 days a week for a year and loves it. They employ a cook and all kids have a hot dinner as well as biscuits and a drink at morning break and toast and a drink mid-afternoon.

Dd (3) is veggie at present (until she decides otherwise) and has a great appetite and eats very well at home and at nursery. The dinners there are unimaginative but just about acceptable as she eats 'good' food at home (ie unprocessed, organic, varied, etc). She seems to eat a lot of veggie mince or quorn sausages when the other kids have chicken nuggets or fish fingers, so I'm not too bothered about this but they seem to eat a lot of chips. Baked beans seem to be their only veg; they never have fresh. Puddings are gross - either ready made jelly which I asked them to replace as dd seemed to be having it every mealtime and now they've proudly announced to me that she now has mousse instead! What's wrong with a piece of fresh fruit? And why do all the kids have to have biscuits mid-morning?

I know I probably seem like a food-nazi but the nursery have been particularly officious about a few things recently, and not very flexible so I've decided to put in writing my thoughts on their food, seeing as I'm paying for the bloody stuff. In the light of the govt's crackdown on school meals and childhood obesity, do you think I've got enough ammo in my rifle or am I being OTT? BTW when dd starts at her pre-school nursery next sept., she will not be allowed any sweets or chocs in her lunchbox, only fresh fruit and water is provided during lessons. Why can't nurseries be more conscientious?

Please excuse the ranting, but I really have got one on me tonight!

by the way it was a metaphorical rifle in case anyone's worried!

I think you have every right to write your letter but reckon you'd be more successful if you don't rant in the letter! Ranting just gets people's backs up and you don't want that. Your "complaint" is just and needs to be heard so do it in a way that will be taken seriously.

I agree - if you're not happy, let them know about it. It isn't difficult to plan meals to be a bit more varied & healthy and IMO I think nursery should be encouraging the kids to know what healthy food is. (Ours got the children to bring in pictures & labels of food & they stuck it onto healthy & unhealthy posters - which seems quite a good idea)
Best of luck !

At my ds nursery the children have ceral and fruit for breakfast. their snack is fruit such as grapes, melon etc a good healthy lunch often a roast and the veggie option is a pasta bake or fish for those who eat that. My ds often has this instead of meat because its so nice followed bya youghurt. They then have fruit or a biscuit for an afternoon snack but aparently most of the children pick the fruit. All the food is fresh as they find it easier than have loads of storage food and only have chips once a week.

I am not allowed to send anything in to the pre-school incase anything has nut traces or any of the other children are allergic.

Hope this helps. I would definately complain after all pre-schools cost enough you should get what you pay for. Let me know how you get on !

Id go in and see them

yes you're right rowlers - I certainly wouldn't dream of ranting in my letter, though, just in the comfort of my own home!

Maybe going in to have a chat with whoevers in charge would be a good idea & not so 'formal' as a written letter. You should definately speak up though if you're not happy

I really don't know why nurseries do this: fruit is easier than almost anything else and parents just wouldn't object. Apart from being water, sugar and e numbers, jelly also usually contains gelatine, so isn't vegetarian. I'd write something about please could you see their menus for the next week in advance and please could you have details of the origin of their food and please could they not give your child jelly since it isn't veggie. I don't know what you're paying but ime of nursery prices it's enough to expect decent food. When ds was under 1 I sent him to a nursery (London) where tea was jam sandwiches and cake. I complained and fruit appeared. The owner then told me that her own kids didn't even realise most people had sugar on their shreddies til they were 7 but that jam sandwiches were acceptable to most of her customers. Hmm, hypocrite. Helped her margin more like, pees me off no end.

It beggars belief doesn't it? I can't believe I'm the only one who has a few misgivings about the food - although come to think of it I was treated like some kind of strange visitor from a different planet when I told them I didn't want dd having biscuits at break and that she was a veggie. When I first said about the jelly and suggested she have plain yoghurt (which she loves at home, with fruit) one of the staff said 'oh we don't do yoghurt, but you're welcome to send it in with her for her pudding'. Yes ok then and I'll take 70p per week off the fees shall I?
I think I'll ask to see the manageress one of the days I pick dd up this week and see if something can be sorted. I just hope she doesn't come out with the old chestnut ' well no-one else seems worried by the food...' Grrr Will let you know.

My dd preschool also serves awful food which is mainly processed junk although they do get healthier snacks of fruit in the day. Otherwise the place is fantastic and dd loves it. I have decided to put dd on packed lunches so I know what she is eating and how much.

the staff did comment on the fact that dd is suddenly eating more and i replied very politely that dd always eats well when it is proper food.

What amuses me is that thanks to our nanny state dd is sent home with booklets on healthy eating telling me how to feed my daughter and yet a school working within the same system feeds her on processed junk!

when I went o pick dd up today i asked for a copy of the menu planner so that i could study it before I launch in. It's a 2 week planner and the same meals get rotated so that children who only go a few days a week (like dd) don't get the same meal every time. It reads like this:
Morning break : milk and biscuits
Lunches from:
Pizza & chips
Savoury mince, potatoes and peas
Fish fingers and mash
macaroni cheese, ham and sweetcorn
lasagne and mixed veg
chicken in mushroom sauce and mash
Puddings from:
mousse
jelly
ice cream
manadarins
peaches (presumably the last 2 are canned)
Afternoon snack:
either crackers, toast or sandwiches followed by piece of fruit or cake (!)

I don;t know about you but I think this sounds pretty rubbish. I'm not a caterer and I know it must take some thought to plan meals for a lot of children, but a lot of this can be described as cheap junk. Where's the fresh veg? Where's the variety?

What does anyone else think? Where should I go from here?

The lunches do seem a bit on the poor side I have to say. Okay to have a fishfinger tyoe dinner maybe once in the planner, but thee seems to be a few of that type. DD is a new nursery and so far has had (all freshly made by Uni next door) - shepherd's pie and veggies, pasta and meatballs, chicken/ham casseroles, roast chicken dinner, sausage and mash, etc. All meals come with fresh veggies. Desserts are normally of the old school dinner type - sponge and custard, etc.

Looks pretty dire to me too moomim. Can you ask if they have a healthy food policy and if so can you see it? Is it in the prospectus? Then you could quote it at them (nicely, in a letter expressing your concerns) and point out their menu doesn't meet it.

Can you check how the nursery intends to get feedback from parents and channel your comments that way. For example, my ds's nursery has parents representatives who can co-ordinate concerns such as yours and feed through to management. If no such parents reps, why not suggest? Not sure if this is common amongst other nurseries?

It's useful knowing how other nurseries manage to feed their charges healthily so thanks for those who have told me. TBH I have a confession to make: for all my spouting and ranting, I am quite scared of confrontations with people I don't really know very well . I know it need not necessarily be a confrontation as such but I'm certainly going in with the notion that they are acting in a way I'm not happy with and I don't know how to start it so that I'm assertive but not aggressive.

What do I do if I get a negative or amibivilent reaction? What should my recourse be? Are nurseries obliged to have an heathy eating policy? I'm wondering if their answer will be to ask me to send dd in with a packed lunch but I don't really want to do this. 1) I don't want dd being made to feel different to the others when they're all sitting down to a hot meal 2) I bloody pay for it! I do feel very strongly though, even to the point I'd consider dd going elsewhere for the next year until she starts her infant school nursery. She's an adaptable little soul but I don't want to disrupt her too much. Am I panicking overly?!

The alternative would be for her to go to her childminder three days a week - if there's a vacancy - instead of the one she does now. She'll be attending preschool for a whole year before reception so I don't think she'd miss out education-wise, just maybe a bit socially.

Why don't you see if you can get a copy of their prospectus and take it from there moomim? You don't need to be confrontational, you can write a lovely letter that gets the result you want! You're paying for this, ask for what you want and your child needs!

I arranged to see the manageress on Thurs when I picked dd up. Shewas very nice and kind off agreed with me about the state of the food. Another lady owns the nursery and the manageress told me that her argument to parents with the same concerns in the past has been 'well, it's been a tried and tested formula for the last 13 yrs so why change now?" !!! WE laughed about it actually, as it's such an inappropriate and irrelevant answer. I also said that I'd read up on the latest ofsted advice about food and drink for nurseries and it stipulates that it has to be 'healthy and nutritious'. Turns out they have an ofsted inspection in november this year, so my concerns couldn't have come at a better time.

Are ofsted inspections for nurseries the same as schools, in that the parents have the chance to speak to the inspection team before it starts? The manageress said she's speak to the owner and pass on my concerns then ring me and tell me what she said. I said that was great but I'd be taking it further and more officially if nothing was going to be done about it - but I said it in a very non-confrontational way and it was all very friendly. Watch this space...

btw they haven't got a food and drink policy in place, so they know they're not up to date with current policy, which is good for my case.

Unfortunately there is alot of problems with nursery ofsted inspections. For starters the nursery gets told when the ofsted inspector is coming so they can PRETEND that they do everything OK. Ive just left anursery (i was manager) and have become a childminder. i provide food and produced a menu for the inspector consisting of shep pie and veg, fishfingers, potatoe and veg , all good food the kids would like. I was told i had to provide full details about what veg ie fresh, frozen etc.. I also have to ensure that i have a variety of meals and was told to provide atleast one pasta dish, one rice dish, one veggie dish and one new taste each week! Fresh fruit should be available on demand or atleast at snack times and fresh veg should always be and option for the children at each meal. can email you a copy of the standards if you want! [email protected]

IKWYM - nursery food in my experience is at best uninteresting & lacking in nutrition, I've tried not to stress about it any more but give my ds the best I can at home ie IMO home-made organic food. I wrote a request to the nursery for him to be given brown bread & organic milk having checked with a couple of other mums who were doing the same - the staff were fine about it, I guess cos they felt engaged & on-side rather than confronted (much as I've been tempted to confront in the past though!). TBH I think Ofsted are useless in terms of ensuring the day-to-day quality of food provision in a nursery. Maybe you could get together with other parents & suggest everyone brings in a couple of pieces of fruit each every week so there's a fruit bowl for snack time? I know you shouldn't be the ones providing this but it's a way to ensure the fruit's there & worked well in Ds's old nursery - they ended up with so much fruit every week that we had to be asked not to bring it in for a while!.

an update - I saw the manageress today and she said she's spoken to the owner who said the following : she's quite happy to provide fruit for dd to have for her puddings (on the days they have fresh fruit - on the other days she can have tinned!) but she has 'no intention' of changing the menu otherwise.
The manageress was a bit embarrassed to be passing this info on and raised her eyebrows as she told me. Firstly, I'm really annoyed that the owner hasn't even bothered to write or initiate any more contact; secondly, it just sounds bloody rude and thirdly, what do i do now?!
My first instinct is to write a letter and say that I'm disppointed about the food and also with her attitude. I'm also really tempted to change nurseries altogether. Dd has nearly another year there before she starts pre-school so it's not like it'd be a waste of time. What does anyone else think?

Change. A year's a long time to be eating crap imo.