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Original poster

Being a vegetarian...at 6 y.o.??

74 replies

Panman · 04/09/2006 22:32

I am a non-meat eater and my dd has now asked a few times if she can be one!!??

I am doubtful about removing meat from her diet, as I am unsure from where else she will get esential nutrients as a liitle one, esp. protein.

I am a 'live away' father, so am only responsible for some of her diet. But, knowing dd as I do, if she deceides on a course of action, she will insist on following it through thoroughly.

Is 6 too young to be not eating meat? Veggie books I have don't provide any lead.

Would anyone have some wisdom on this, please?

OP posts:
Rhubarb · 04/09/2006 22:36

6 is too young to make up her mind about this, it could be that she just wants to imitate you or please you in some way. I would ask what her reasons are and find out if she has asked her mother the same thing, I would bet that her mother knows nothing of it.

If you don't eat meat at your house, then do veggie meals for you both and she can eat meat with her mother.

I do know of children that have been brought up veggies with no obvious health problems, but I always feel as though the parent's wishes have overruled the children's choices. I'd wait until she could cook her own meals personally, then she could cook whatever she wanted!

mazzystar · 04/09/2006 22:36

According to my mother, I chose to be a vegetarian from the age of three or four, although I imagine it was simply a case of refusing not to eat meat. I have reverted to borderline carnivorousness thirty years later.

Its perfectly possible to get all the proteins she needs from a meat-free diet, but you will have to join forces wiht her other carers to make sure that she does.

mazzystar · 04/09/2006 22:38

Oh doh! I mean refusing to eat meat. I am really very tired.

oops · 04/09/2006 22:41

Message withdrawn

NotQuiteCockney · 04/09/2006 22:42

Vegetarian is fine - there's nothing in meat that you can't get (easily) from eggs and dairy. Vegan is harder, I think.

hester · 04/09/2006 22:43

I always refused meat as a child and am still pretty much vegetarian. has she said why she doesn't want to eat meat? If it is for political/ethical reasons then I'd probably humour her - it won't last long. If she just feels squeamish about meat (as I always have) then you probably don't want to force her to choke it down. Either way, I'd probably let her have her way for a while, so long as she understands that in return she must agree to eat appropriate amounts of other foods e.g. lentils, tofu.

nearlythree · 04/09/2006 22:48

I have two veggie daughters. One aged 4 is very healthy, the other aged 2 has anaemia but is a very picky eater, always has been right from weaning. I have tried her with meat but to no avail.

Does your dd eat a wide range of other foods i.e. pulses, vegetables, things like hummus and falafel? If so she is probably adventurous enough to eat the things she needs.

Also check out the Vegetarian Society's website for info.

Rhubarb · 04/09/2006 22:49

Does no-one else question her reasons then? Does no-one think she is doing it just to please her dad? Would you take the decisions of a 6yo seriously? Perhaps next time dd wants to wear knickers on her head to school then I should let her!

QueenEagle · 04/09/2006 22:51

My 3 older kids aged 14, 12 and 10 have all been veggie for just over 3 years. It was their own choice; they toyed with it several times then returned to eating meat before finally turning their backs on meat eating for good after we returned from a holiday in Menorca after seeing whole animal heads and legs and feet on the deli counters.

My 2 youngest kids aged 3 and 21 months have been veggie since their birth and if they decide when they are older that they want to eat meat and animal products, they can. However, my 3 year old will not touch meat at all and appears to have a very good understanding that it comes from an animal. He simply says he doesn't want to eat animals.

dh is veggie, I am a meat eater so they kids have a balnace of information and influence over what they eat. They have all chosen (well the 4 older ones) to be veggie. So in answer to the original question - yes a 6 year old is quite old enough imo to decide to be a veggie and it is very easy to ensure they still eat a well balnaced diet.

nearlythree · 04/09/2006 22:55

Probably I'm a bad mother but I do believe in letting children have some input. If panman's dd is trying to imitate him then I guess she'll be veggie with him and not elsewhere. Children are always trying to copy their parents and providing what they are trying out is safe and responsible I see no harm in letting them - after all they may well soon be bored with it.

As for the knickers on head, if dd1 asked loads of times and wouldn't listen to my reasons why it isn't a good idea, then I'd say she could - I think she'd soon change her mind and decide it wasn't such a good idea after all!

Rhubarb · 04/09/2006 22:57

I must be a facist then! I don't even give mine choices of what to have for dinner! They either eat or starve.

Heavens knows life is hard enough without giving the little tikes choices as well!

dd knows where her meat comes from and she has had a hand in preparing it, plucking pheasants and so on and watching grandma cut them open. I would never shelter her from any of that, it's nature. She hasn't asked not to eat it. Not that I'd give her the choice of course!

Freckle · 04/09/2006 22:57

DH became a vegetarian at age 5. His mother just gave him what everyone else had minus the meat - he is now 6'3" and as skinny as a rake! I'm sure that, being more aware of the nutritional requirements of a young child than I presume my MIL was over 40 years ago, you will ensure your dd receives enough protein. Don't forget that protein is not just found in meat, but also in beans and pulses, etc.

edam · 04/09/2006 22:58

Panman, contact The Vegetarian Society. They can give you all the info you need about providing all the essential nutrients for children within a vegetarian diet. It's honestly not that hard. Basically you just have to ensure they eat different kinds of protein - don't rely on dairy alone.

I'm veggie, but ds and dh aren't. If ds wants to be vegetarian at any stage, I'll follow his wishes - I remember only too clearly being made to eat meat as a child.

What's the betting you do all that really diligently and it turns out it's a passing phase?

Btw, Rhubarb, bringing children up as vegetarians is no more over-ruling the child's wishes than bringing them up as meat eaters. Either way, it's the parent's choice. (I happen to have made the choice for ds to eat meat, because dh is the one who enjoys cooking and he cooks meat. Not because there's anything lacking in vegetarian diets.)

nearlythree · 04/09/2006 22:59

That's the second time you've made me tonight!

We live in the country, mostly arable rather than livestock but dd1 knows why she doesn't eat meat. Dd2 is just bloody-minded!

merrily · 04/09/2006 22:59

I don't see why this should be a problem. A 6 year old should be fine on a veggie diet. As long as she understands that she needs to eat lots of dairy products, pulses, etc to make up the protein. Do a search on Amazon for vegetarian and kids - there are lots of books on raising children on a vegetarian diet.

Mind you as Hester says it might just be that phase that many girls go through - I remember when I was at school most of my friends went veggie at some point, it rarely lasted very long! If she is committed to it though, then why not let her give it a try?

bluebear · 04/09/2006 22:59

My kids have been veggie since birth (their father is veggie, I am not) - there is no problem with protein as long as they still eat dairy (milk, cheese etc).
My ds was given the optiion of eating meat when he was 4 - he did for a few months, then gave it some more thought and decided that he didn't want to eat animals. (bother - I would like another meat-eater to keep me company).
He is aware that he can change his mind at any time (and has occasionally asked to taste something with meat in), but 99% of the time he wants to be veggie).
Only problem we have had is school dinners (he started school at age 4 and is very shy so not up to asking for alternatives when the only veggie option was yuck) but he has a packed lunch now.

QueenEagle · 04/09/2006 23:01

As a meat eater I have to say how proud I actually am that my older 3 have stuck to their stated principles on vegetarianism!

Today we were at my mum's who served up a dessert that was not veggie, but unless you read the ingredients it was not immediately obvious that it wasn't. ds1 was just about to put some in his mouth when I told him it contained animal fats - he stopped horrified yet gutted he missed out on pudding!

Rhubarb · 04/09/2006 23:03

Mine would eat jam sandwiches all day and every day if I let her! I suppose I am imposing my carnivorlistic views on her, but I'm of the opinion that they don't know if they don't like something unless they've tried it 20 times, so even though she claims to hate sprouts, how can she really know?

Besides, kids hate vegetables, so if you cut out meat wtf do they eat? Bet if you offered her turkey twizzlers she'd bite your hand off for them! Don't think they have actual turkey in them though, do they?

nearlythree · 04/09/2006 23:03

One massive advantage I've found is that my dds don't seem to get anywhere near the number of d&v bugs that others do. Might be coincidence.

Rhubarb · 04/09/2006 23:04

QE, I'd have told him after he'd eaten it and commented on how nice it was - but then I'm evil!

Original poster
Panman · 04/09/2006 23:06

Thank you for all of this.

There wil be some of 'imitating' going on, no doubt. I explained to her that I don't eat meat as I think it is cruel to the animals in the whole process and unnecesary. But, I am not wishing to 'force' her to think/act in the same way.
Also, she ADORES animals, and it is dawning on her what the whole process of eating meat involves i.e. "am I really eating Bambi??!!". She asks "which animal is this?" often.

It would be entirely ok if it was only veggie here, but as Isay, if she does think it is wrong to eat Bambi and "friends", then she WILL follow it through to all her diet.

No, she is not an adventurous eater, and Ido not wish to trigger a diet problem.

I will check out the Veg. Soc. resource, thanks.
If she asked once only, then I would be easy, and not bother with this question. But, like tonight, she came back to it. I will ask her why she wishes to avoid meat, really.

And yes, her mum does know of this, as I mentioned it. Sheis a "when I could be bothered" veggie, so I do not also wish to trigger a difficulty with dd diet overall at home, if it can be avoided.

OP posts:
Blu · 04/09/2006 23:07

Healthwise, it will be fine, if she eats a wide and varied diet - and as a veggie yourself, you must know what groups of food she needs to eat.

However, I am with Rhubarb a bit!

DS, 4.5, became a 'vegetarigen' for a while because his best friend at school is one, and he wanted to 'be like him', try it out, etc etc. I have no strong feelings, if he wants to be veggie, he can, so I went along with it. I is highly likely that your dd has some kind of motive which is to do with wanting to follow in your footsteps (and why not, you're her dad)...be like you...possibly as a way of making sure you like her and approve of her - especially as you are 'live away'. All perfectly natural and harmless. the only danger is if she does a big 'well daddy lets me be vegetarian' when she is with her other parent and there is tension of any kind.

Why not let her eat as you do when she is with you, enjoy that, try it out, tell her factually the reasons you are veggie, and that you MUST eat certain varieties of food to stay fit - but make sure you let other parent / guardian figures in her life know what is going on, and that you yourself put no pressure on her or make it a 'point scoring' issue of any kind.

It doesn't sound as if you are doing that -and it isn't as if vegetarianism is a mad cult or 'bad' in any way.

nearlythree · 04/09/2006 23:08

What about just cutting out the cuter animals and keeping poultry and fish? That's what dh does!

QueenEagle · 04/09/2006 23:08

Rhubarb, I'm sorry but that is just the kind of ignorant attitude that really gets my back up. As much as I love meat and would happily tuck into a juicy steak, I would never be so underhand with someone elses principles.

edam · 04/09/2006 23:10

Not funny, Rhubarb. Seriously, why would you want to belittle someone's beliefs like that? Taking away their control over their own bodies? OK, they are children, but that doesn't mean their wishes can be subverted just to amuse you.

I honestly have no idea why some meat eaters think it is so funny to try to catch vegetarians out. Would you feed a Muslim child pork for a laugh?