Do you prepare a different meal for each child at mealtimes?

[Upsadaisy]

My two are fussy and despite trying to just prepare one meal for us all to eat, I end up preparing several different.

I'm curious to know what everyone else with more than one child does?

Mine "get what they are given", it's a house rule and the basis of basic good manners in my opinion. I expect them to at least try everything, because I have cooked it for them and I find children pulling faces and sneering at food VERY objectionable. There's a particular screwed-up mardy face that all finicky children pull, it just looks so spoilt and nasty.

I do try to serve things I know they will eat a lot of the time though. I often add one component which is either new or less popular, and occasionally a whole meal which I know is going to be more of a challenge. I don't offer them alternatives if they don't eat it, but I don't make a big fuss about it either. I would never force order a child to eat (tempting though it is sometimes).

am chastened by this thread. i prepare one basic meal but variations - e.g. spicy curry and rice for me, DP and dd3, then a mild version of the same for dd1 who doesn't like hot spices, and dd2 - the fussiest - might just eat rice and plain veg and yoghurt, or some bland version of what we're having. So we're all eating the same ingredients but we aren't all eating the same.

they can have bread and cheese or fruit if they don't want the main course, nothing else.

Your DS sounds like my DD leece... she can't bear her food touching, and has to have a clean knife if it get dirty... and as for her tasting crunchy or crispy food.... forget it..

Its difficult isnt it runmum, especially when I know its not because hes just being fussy. I used to stress about it for years, Jamie Oliver didnt help recently either, I felt under even more pressure to try and get him to eat healthy. Ive relaxed about it now as me being vexed and anxious about it didnt make it any better.

I've not read all of this, but has anyone here mentioned those of us who HAVE to prepare different meals for dc with special medical/dietry needs? It is a NIGHTMARE. How many times have I longed for a child who was JUST fussy, and was only CHOOSING not to eat the dairy part, rather than not being ABLE to. I've got to the point now of feeding everyone the same bland 'special' meals, just to avoid running a restaurant sometimes. grrrr

Ohhhh... naswm.. I've got one of those as well...

It's bloody hard isn't it rummum? DS2 has tried to be fussy, but being dairy, egg and soya free he is not allowed to (although I am starting to introduce little bits of previoulsy excluded foods into his diet, so hope it will get easier.) I dont envy those parents of 'fussy' eaters. I would find it hard to be patient, and probably say 'eat it or go hungry'. At least with DS2 I know is for health reasons. (Doesn't make it any easier though!)

We often end up with 4 separate meals for 4 people, served at different times! I'm a coeliac, so I have an excuse . DW will eat my gluten-free pasta, but dd likes pasta with no sauce, so can always tell the difference.

Anyway atm we have no kitchen, so salads and dips are the major source of food.

I'm new, but was wondering how crunchie managed being veggie when the rest of the family aren't? Have recently given up meat, dp & ds(2) like it. Not great cook @ best of times, struggling as I often spend ages cooking lovely meal for them & have cereal for myself! Now pg again, so feel it can only get worse. Just went off meat a few months ago (not becoz of pregnancy). dp suggested 'forking' ie same dish but with slightly diff ingredients like risotto with veg base but last minute addition of chicken (which I am doing today). Any other suggestions? Lots of cookbooks, but no talent in the kitchen!

Well, if you're cooking, cook something you want to eat. If they want meat, they can cook it themselves. That's my view.

I do things like your DH suggested, but I am afraid I have a bit of an easy life. My kids eat at the childminders during the week, and DH works random hours inc eves. Usually I make a huge veggie casserole of some sort (curry, chilli, moroccan whatever) then eat it over a few days with rice, pasta, potatoes etc.

I use a lot of quorn too, to replace meat in bolognaise or mince type dishes. Use the fillets or pieces to replace chiken in things too.

At the weekend I often do a roast chicken that everyone loves, and do a massive dish of roast veggies - pepper, butternut squash, sweet potato, onions etc - and sometimes a big dish of cauliflower cheese too (if we have people over). That does Sunday, as we have 'picnic tea' in the living room in front of a crappy film, which is tea and crumpets and bits and bobs.

Sausage and mash is always good as I have quorn or other veggie sausages.

HTH

MI it's not as easy as that I am happy to bring up my kids eating meat as dh eats meat. If they want to be veggie they can.

Me and DH have such different tastes in food (Jack Spratt springs to mind) that there are few things that we both really like. He won't eat chinese, I love it. He likes meat meat and more meat, I love veggies veggies and carbs. We both like Pizza, but still order 2 when we go out. We all like pasta, but he doesn't like Quorn bolognaise and I don't like meat. I like cheesy sauces (when not on my diet, he likes meaty sauces) So we all eat different foods!!

But Crunchie, what I rather brusquely meant was can't DH cook the meat meals? I think you are selfless, cooking things you're not prepared to eat - I don't cook things I don't like, let alone have a principled objection to!

(My partner cooks most of the meat in the Inferiority Complex, in fact.)

I do upsadaisy.

DS1 is autistic and gluten free. Is just coming out of an incredibly limited diet, that I wouldn't want my other children to eat.

Ds2 can eat anything

Ds3 is gluten free, but not fussy.

Twice a week they have the same meal (buckwheat pancakes), and ds1 has school dinners, ds2 nursery dinners.

DS1 is just starting to eat more widely (school have worked on it for over a year), am going to try him on crisp sandwich bolognaise tonight (he eats more widely but only if its fed to him between small bits of crisps). The other 2 can have it as well, and we had it for tea last night, so bargain for me :o

And advice- NEVER ask for food advice on mnet.

Similar to Crunchie, my dh doesn't eat meat but has recently started to eat fish.

I do stuff like sausage and mash, spaghetti bolognese (1 version with Quorn mince), ditto cottage pie, soya mince & potato curry , roast dinner (he will have a veggie pie/bake type thing). And there's always omelettes, various pasta dishes, pizza etc.

dh is not exactly a good cook so it's just easier if I do it, plus he's not home from work until after the childreh have eaten. May be you could set up a separate thread for ideas?

I can understand cooking seperate meals for alergies/medical reasons etc it's just when children are just being picky that I refuse to play ball. If I decided to go veggie then I would still cook meat for the rest of the family and if one or both of the children were to go veggie with me I would still be happy to cook two variations of the same thing for us to sit and eat together.

me, ds1 and ds3 are lactose (or casein) intol; Dh and ds2 are not; ds1 has AS and is restrictive..... so we eat lactose free, I put cheese or butter on top of those whoc an have it, and if DS1 won't eat it he gets a brocolli omelette. I never make more than 2 dishes, one being the omelette. life is too short.

(And I'd skip the omelette most days.... life's too short and he isn't SN enough that he can't, one day, at least TRY to fit in)

DH usually cooks his own during the week, Basically Mon- Fri he eats whatever is in the fridge, or freezer, so usually sausages, or chicken wrapped in bacon or something. As we all eat at different times this is easier. At the weekends when we eat together I cook as my dd's don't eat anything dh has cooked!!! Also I enjoy cooking and since it isn't the everyday grind I have no problem

Aha, I get you.

No way.My two eat what they are given or go hungry.I know too many children who expect meals cooked to order & will only eat limited things.I'm not having it in my house.

I don't cook separate meals, but I do try to ensure I take some account of reasonable likes and dislikes and that no-one goes hungry. I wouldn't serve something up I knew a child hated and expect them to eat it or go hungry - e.g ds1 hates lasagne, but since it's about the only thing he does hate I think it'd be a bit unreasonable to serve it up. E.g we always have fish with cauli cheese as my dd1 hates fish but will eat this, or people can have grated cheese/ ham with the baked potato and veg if they decide they hate main course. Or I'm usually willing to make an omelette for someone. Anyone is welcome to a sandwich after the meal if they haven't eaten anything and it's something new I'm trying out, but not otherwise. I'm also not bothered if they have pasta plain with cheese - two of them did that for ages. Just try to give them a raw carrot or extra fruit at some point.

I know I said earlier that I don't cook seperate meals generally. However I always take into account genuine likes and dislikes, and will provde alternatives in those cases. Let's face it - I do myself a veggie alternative many days because I don't like meat, so can hardly not do that.

My Dad never 'pandered' to our tastes. He'd cook one meal whether we liked it or not. I still resent being made to sit up at the table after everyone else had got down because he'd done something completely vile. It would end up being thrown away and then I'd steal food out of the kitchen later because I was hungry. I didn't eat pizza or curry in a restaurant until I was in my 20's because of my experiences at home. My dad was an arse in so many ways, but the whole 'I'm a grown up so you'll do what I say, eat what I tell you to eat' malarky makes me very uneasy.

On no account am I accusing any MNERs of being such a pita as my exdad btw!

I don't cook much. DD and I usually have reheated stuff made by hubby. We are grateful for anything we get. If I am in charge it is beans on toast or ravioli usually, and loads of fruit. Truly can't be a*sed to cook after day at work so just work at staving off starvation.

I make 1950s style meat and 3 veg for tea - then if you don't like something you just have a smaller portion of that one thing.

Any sort of one pot thing (pasta, stir fry etc.) is a disaster with various allergies and likes and dislikes.