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Original poster

Do you prepare a different meal for each child at mealtimes?

114 replies

Upsadaisy · 18/04/2006 18:14

My two are fussy and despite trying to just prepare one meal for us all to eat, I end up preparing several different.

I'm curious to know what everyone else with more than one child does?

OP posts:
Clary · 19/04/2006 09:27

certainly not.
They get what they are given.
All my 3 are good eaters, but yes, they do have preferences, and if offering fruit I will of course give a choice, but dinner is what it is. You don't like fish pie? tough bananas.
usually find they eat it then!!
Gosh reading other posts, I even do the same sandwiches (usually ham or cheese anyway).
lol at gdg and jools re jam or marmelade...
Agree with MI that I don't do things they loathe...eg don't force ds1 to eat bananas (the only thing he doesn't like).
I did some fresh pasta filled with salmon the other day and it was very unpopular - won't be doing that again lol!

Clary · 19/04/2006 09:29

Was once at a pal’s house for dinner and she has 4 children, including the pickiest eater I know and the others are not great.
She asked me - will your 3 want the cucumber peeled?
Oh, no, that’s fine, I said.
How thick do they like the slices? was the next question!
fgs - they’ll just eat it! Quite an insight into her life in the kitchen, that.....

crunchie · 19/04/2006 09:34

peeling cucumbers!! slicing it thick!! FFS

Although sometimes my girls will ask for cucumber batons rather than slices for the next day in their lunchboxes.

Reading this thread I need to get tougher, but like I said I don't eat the same, so it is hard to get them to.

I think more of the 'this is it, if you don't eat there is NOTHING until the next meal' and stick with that. They often have snacks, fruit, yoghurts etc, but they are natural grazers rather than 3 meals a day kids.

Tortington · 19/04/2006 09:34

i had a friend who gave her son chocolate, crisps, cereal - anything he wanted in between meals, then took him to the doctor becuase he wouldnt eat his meals

crazy bitch

Chandra · 19/04/2006 09:36

DS is allergic to soooo many things that we prepared meals especially for him. As a result he had a "watered down" version of what we were eating that was neither very nutrious or tasted good. Anyways since we decided to cook the same for all the family, and despite the fact that meant to remove milk products, soya, fish, nuts, and egg from our diets, we are all eating much better as it has forced us to concentrate in creating a very nutritious meal that tastes well that we all can enjoy.

Chandra · 19/04/2006 09:38

Oh yes, the snacks can be the mother of food fuzzines. Since the dietitian advised us to limit the snacks to fruit (remove the carbs/fat part of them) we have more success in getting him to eat proteins and vegetables -in good quantities- at main meals.

Mistymoo · 19/04/2006 09:40

No I don't cook seperate dinners. They have to eat what I put out for them. I believe it helps them try different food and I couldn't be bothered Grin. It takes me all my time to think of one dinner a day let alone more!

Oblomov · 19/04/2006 09:50

My s-i-l prepares 6 different meals every night.
Her h is a builder.
She is on weightwatchers.
Her 4 children come in and tell her " I want this" - and she cooks it.

Dh and I were always horrified by this.
But, then it is easy for us to scorn.
So far ds(2) eats everything, and 95 % of the time eats the same meal as us , and has always done.
I don't know where she finds the time or energy.

nutcracker · 19/04/2006 09:51

My kids eat what they are given, unless they truley don't like something in which case I save that meal for when they aren't here.

motherinferior · 19/04/2006 12:03

Actually I have come back shamefaced to this thread to say I am prepared to do separate breakfasts. I get a bit zealous about breakfast, as I then make both Inferiorettes walk to DD2's childminder (over half a mile) and then go on with DD1 to her school, which is another half mile or so (it's a triangle, I'd need to do you a diagram). So if I'm doing breakfast (DP does most of them but leaves early on Wednesdays) and DD2 wants the same cereal as me, not the warmed-up pancake her sister's having (DP made them and froze a couple for Weds!) I'm not going to throw a wobbly because I'd rather she stoked up on food. In other words, I am a malleable wimp and should eat my words Blush

foffsmum · 19/04/2006 12:10

Just been reading the thread ... very interesting and highly enjoyable read .... however am I the only Mum who feeds dd at a different time to myself and dh?? Dd eats at about 4.30-5pm as she has her bath at 6pm and then in bed by 6.30pm. Myself and dh eat at about 7pm (once he is home from work etc). I do however cook meals that are similar to ours so once she is older (and stays up later) we will all eat the same. She doesn't really get a say in what I cook - I just tell her what she is having and if she doesn't eat it then she gets nothing else - maybe a bit of fruit a bit later on but thats it!!! However if she does eat it she will then get some icecream (miniscule portion) for dessert. :) Btw dd is 22 months.

sickandtired · 19/04/2006 12:29

i'm with you foffsmum, ds1 and 2 eat at the same time as your and go to bed at the same time - we eat late, but at the weekend, when we are all here we eat together. And I always sit at the table with them while they eat

Uwila · 19/04/2006 12:30

No way. You get what you get, and if you don't want it then don't eat. This rule applies to children and adults in my house. I have very little patience for people who don't appreciate what I have taken the time and effort to prepare for them. I want my children to learn to say "thank you" when some cooks them a meal, and not "ew I don't like that".

mummyhill · 19/04/2006 12:31

I am at home durring the day and eat all my meals with the children with the exception of tues and thurs evening when I eat later with dh. I usually leave his meal for him to heat up later as I have to be in work by 6.30pm most nights. At the weekend we all sit down and eat together though. It is easier for me to just cook once a day iyswim.

Clary · 19/04/2006 12:34

foffsmum, no, we eat later than the children too. It's very rare for everyone to be in the house at 5.30, tho if we are then we do eat together. More in the hols as well as 'm not so fussed about late bedtime.
But I have 3 children and cook the same thing for them.
MI, I do different breakfasts too, but that's different. It's no hassle to do one bowl of weetabix and one of rice krispies, one bowl of grapes and one cut-up apple, is it? I think that's fine.

Kelly1978 · 19/04/2006 12:34

I often cook three different meals, but starting to get it down to two most of the time. We don't eat the same as the kids, because we prefer food more spicy. The twins and the older two don't always eat the same neither. It nothing to do with fussiness, though, just a matter of what they can eat. I won't be pandering to them as they get older.

foffsmum · 19/04/2006 12:47

YAY!! Glad I'm not alone :) And like you sickandtired we usually all try and eat at the same time on weekends etc, as well as this we try and eat out a lot too - as I think it is important for kids to get used to eating in company and trying lots of different things that I never seem to get around to cooking!!!! Yesterday dh was home early and we all had lamb stirfry at 4.45pm!!! however the cheese and crackers had to come out for myself at about 8pm as I was peckish again by then!!!! Blush

mummyhill · 19/04/2006 12:55

Super is always a good option for adults eating early with the kids!!!

crunchie · 19/04/2006 13:03

MI but its breakfast, I give a choice between ceral and toast and cherrios or weetabix. That is not actual food preparation is it!!

It's only if we are having porridge or a cooked breakfast that they eat the same. Actually then again if I am doing a full on cooked breakfast DH has bacon and sausage with eggs, I have baked beans and mushrooms, so the kids can choose what combo they want since I am cooking it anyway. I have found myself doing 2 types of eggs too, but that is rare.

motherinferior · 19/04/2006 13:05

I have found myself offering different sorts of cooked, a bit - as in 'ok you don't want your cheese on toast, I'll boil an egg' Blush. Nothing overly stressful, though. And as I say I do get a bit zealous about making sure they get something inside them.

crunchie · 19/04/2006 13:06

Ah but once mine have chosen they eat it or nothing IYKWIM

leece · 19/04/2006 13:20

I cook different food for ds as he only eats chicken nuggets and chips and occasionally a beefburger. I dont really fancy eating that night after night, so I do my own.

spidermama · 19/04/2006 13:29

I haven't read the thread but there is absolutely now way in the world I'd be prepared to pander to fussiness on this scale.

I cook meals, they eat them or have bread and butter (which never actually happens.) I have four kids and it would be ridiculous for me to spend so long in the kitchen. Also, if a child comes on a playdate I think it's really rude if they ask for something else.

I think this is pandering. Also, at the risk of sounding smug, my kids all tend to eat what I cook for them (and what other mums cook for them) because they know there won't be other options.

leece · 19/04/2006 13:36

DS is 6yrs and has a few erm food issues though. He only eats dry food of a certain colour and it must look and taste quite bland. It cant touch other food on his plate and he has to wipe his knife and fork after each mouthful because of germs apparently.
Have you seen Jack Nicolson in as good as it gets, thats my ds that is pmsl

DS has aspergers btw

sunnydelight · 19/04/2006 14:37

No way - I have three children and I'm not running a restaurant. Kids have to learn that they can't have their "favourite food" all the time; like spidermama my kids eat what they are given. If friends come round I ask if they are vegetarian/have allergies which obviously I will make sure I accommodate, apart from that they are expected to do they same - if they make a fuss about food they are not invited again as it really gets on my nerves. I know I am really intolerant but I have enough to do looking after my own kids, if other people can't teach their children to have basic good manners at other people's houses I don't want them here.