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Original poster

Promising young woman. Anyone seen it?

76 replies

Whentheydontmeanwhattheysay · 03/10/2021 07:19

I watched the trailer & thought that it looked good.
It has actually me feeling really uncomfortable and upset and I can’t seem to straighten out my thoughts. It’s just so horribly true to life in the beginning and I suppose it has triggered some awful feelings.

OP posts:
nameswap48 · 06/10/2021 08:38

@DreadingItBadly I don't agree with you at all, I don't think it matters how "beautiful" a woman is to be in this role, sexual assault is a reality and possibility for all women and as such it does not matter which actress was in that role, in that regard.

KnobJockey · 06/10/2021 08:43

I thought it was a brilliant film.

I think it's a film that a lot of men won't like- too close to the bone, even if not for them then for seeing how friends may behave with a drunk woman, and what it means in reality, that it is assault/ rape.

DragonDoor · 06/10/2021 08:52

@DreadingItBadly

Why ‘hotter’? To titillate viewers in the audience?

I thought Carey Mulligan was great in the role, and very well cast.

The character is not a one dimensional ‘bombshell’ archetype. She is petite and girly, unassuming. That was central to the plot.

Also, she is very attractive?

ToooOldForThis · 06/10/2021 08:55

I loved it, and the soundtrack is great. I'm sorry it was unsettling for you OP.

I think CM is stunning so I suppose it all depends on taste!

ElaineMarieBenes · 06/10/2021 08:56

It’s a brilliant film - Carey Mulligan was absolutely perfect for the role (as always!).

DreadingItBadly · 06/10/2021 08:57

[quote nameswap48]@DreadingItBadly I don't agree with you at all, I don't think it matters how "beautiful" a woman is to be in this role, sexual assault is a reality and possibility for all women and as such it does not matter which actress was in that role, in that regard. [/quote]
names

Whilst she isn't as traditionally "movie beautiful" as Margot Robbie - are these your words or not? So what is it you don't agree with? That's the only point I was making.

And I hope we all are allowed to have our own opinions about anyone's appearance as well how we would imagine a character to look like. I am not the only one who thinks it so no point in arguing.

nameswap48 · 06/10/2021 08:59

@DreadingItBadly your opinion that a younger, "hotter" actress needed to play the role is sexist and I'm calling you up on it. Christ if women don't get it how can we ever expect men to.

DreadingItBadly · 06/10/2021 09:03

[quote DragonDoor]@DreadingItBadly

Why ‘hotter’? To titillate viewers in the audience?

I thought Carey Mulligan was great in the role, and very well cast.

The character is not a one dimensional ‘bombshell’ archetype. She is petite and girly, unassuming. That was central to the plot.

Also, she is very attractive?[/quote]
Not to titillate anything - and CM is titillating enough - but this whole move is about breaking stereotypes. Which is why some believe that she had to be more "traditionally hot" to accentuate the point.

To my personal taste, CM is beautiful but we are talking about a movie and the appearance of a character here, not about her personally.

DragonDoor · 06/10/2021 09:04

To add- and I should have started with this, sorry to hear that you found it unsettling OP.

I did too, but at the same time found it sort of empowering that the story shone a light on the behaviour of these ‘nice guys’.

The character sought cold hard revenge.

If it’s triggered you, and you want to discuss it further, you might want to look up a women’s organisation in your area to find out what talking services are available.

DragonDoor · 06/10/2021 09:08

this whole move is about breaking stereotypes. Which is why some believe that she had to be more "traditionally hot" to accentuate the point.

I personally didn’t see that as a point the film was making, but I suppose everyone has different interpretations as a viewer.

DreadingItBadly · 06/10/2021 09:08

[quote nameswap48]@DreadingItBadly your opinion that a younger, "hotter" actress needed to play the role is sexist and I'm calling you up on it. Christ if women don't get it how can we ever expect men to.[/quote]
This is not only my opinion and there is a difference between real-life situations which cover many variations and a character depicted in a movie which is made for impact. You are trying hard to prove a point and as I said, you have picked a wrong audience.

zafferana · 06/10/2021 09:15

I thought it was very good - and very timely - and totally disagree that Carey Mulligan wasn't 'hot' enough. The whole point of the film was that there were only really two things that mattered, which was that she was female and drunk and therefore ripe for the picking. So few women are as stunning as Margot Robbie that her beauty could've been used by viewers to justify the men's actions along the lines of: 'Well if a woman THAT stunning was to be 'available', then who could blame some guy for trying his luck?', whereas CM is more of an 'every woman', attractive yes, but not model beautiful. There are many more CMs in the world than MRs, and that's the point, it could happen to any of us.

Batfinkwings · 06/10/2021 09:20

I thought this was a great film. It was an interesting way of looking at the issues.
I particularly liked the fact it looked at the “nice guys” in a different light, and showed the impact of brushing off this kind of thing.

Disappointingly, although my DH “enjoyed it” (probably the wrong word but you know what I mean) he didn’t really “get it”. DH watches films very much from a critical point of view and didn’t really like the twist Hmm
I was disappointed it didn’t make DH think about male behaviour a bit more, but hey ho. He is very respectful and I believe he thinks he wouldn’t be friends with guys who do this kind of thing. I think he is VERY wrong in this assumption and that’s one thing this film is looking into.
Anyway, I think as a woman it provokes a lot of thoughts and feelings. Hope you are ok OP.

toastfiend · 06/10/2021 09:22

I loved it. DH liked it too, although I think he found it quite confronting about the behaviour of some of his "friends" and colleagues in the past. I think more men should watch it, it's the most accurate and honest depiction of how so-called "nice" guys can behave that I've seen.

I agree that it was unsettling, mainly because it was so close to the bone. I think Carey Mulligan is beautiful, but I agree with other posters that the whole point is that letchy men and assault don't just happen to stunningly beautiful women, but also to ordinary, everyday women. I think someone like Margot Robbie would have really detracted from the purpose of the film. Carey Mulligan is beautiful, but it's a more relatable beauty and in the real world, it's usually normal everyday, ordinary women who are assaulted, not world renowned beauties and although they may be attractive how attractive they are generally isn't that relevant. I've heard "nice" guys talking about "taking the grenade" to refer to hooking up with a less attractive (to their eyes) woman because they view them as an easy target or so their friend can have "unimpeded access" to a more attractive friend, seen them prowling around dance floors at the end of a night to target someone they deem less attractive because they think it's more likely that they will sleep with them, heard all the old "fat girls try harder in bed" shite. This kind of behaviour is absolutely not limited to conventionally beautiful women.

Seasonschange · 06/10/2021 09:24

Someone told me that the movie was supposed to end at that big shocking scene. But the writers were told it was to depressing so they added an extra chapter. I think it would have been better left how it was.

I spent the first half of that film being a bit disgruntled at how unrealistic her confrontations were, thinking surely some of the men she picks WOULD resort to violence when challenged… and then obviously that shocking ending. I liked the twist when her “nice guy” turned out to not be so nice. Because I thought it was so realistic to how so many guys could be him.

IsabellesMissingSock · 06/10/2021 09:26

Brilliant film with a great ending, and I love the song that gets played right at the end.

Artonthefridge · 06/10/2021 09:38

@DreadingItBadly I'm sure you don't mean to offend but here we are.

I am an overweight woman with spots and occasionally unwashed hair. I was taken home from a bar and sexually assaulted. Seeing internet comments like yours is deeply demoralising.

Artonthefridge · 06/10/2021 09:39

Another vote for the movie btw. I thought it was incredible.

partystress · 06/10/2021 09:52

Absolutely loved the film, and I was completely depressed by it. My 17 year old DD loved it, and watched it again with her BF, who found it very uncomfortable.

I read somewhere that her notebook showed different colours for different encounters and this signified those that had ended in violence 😢.

MiddleClassProblem · 06/10/2021 12:39

@DreadingItBadly the trouble is that there is a stereotype portrayed by the media and men that only the most commercially attractive women are preyed upon, especially in this way. So you saying you want it to break stereotypes seems like a contradiction.

AmDillDandin · 06/10/2021 12:53

She is very attractive but not the kind which would be natural for this role

Literally any woman would be natural for this role. That is the whole point.

Hoppinggreen · 06/10/2021 12:57

I thought it was brilliant.
DH actually watched it by accident and then suggested I watched it too. He was actually shocked and horrified and said it threw a different light on some things that had gone on when we were at Uni. He also discussed it with DD

IsabellesMissingSock · 06/10/2021 13:05

@AmDillDandin

She is very attractive but not the kind which would be natural for this role

Literally any woman would be natural for this role. That is the whole point.

I completely agree with this. It's exactly the point of the whole film.
REDHERO · 06/10/2021 13:06

Excellent film, makes the audience think

REDHERO · 06/10/2021 13:09

More men should watch it.
I imagine it would make some of them squirm at the very least. They should squirm, they should feel uncomfortable and maybe change their outlook.