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Feminism: sex and gender

Original poster

Family court decision removing child from primary carer

57 replies

Watermelonbathbomb · 17/12/2023 11:08

I just saw this in the Guardian and was quite shocked: https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/law/2023/dec/16/uk-court-removes-daughter-from-care-of-mother-who-disputed-use-of-expert. From the write-up, it seems to me that the decision is massively unfair. I was also surprised to read, on googling the expert, that they have been sanctioned for malpractice in the past. Having know women who have struggled tremendously during custody battles and having thought I might have to go there myself, it resonated. Was wondering if anyone else had seen it and their thoughts? Thanks.

OP posts:
daffodilandtulip · 21/12/2023 20:19

Tacotortoise · 21/12/2023 17:10

Parental alienation is definitely a thing, I've seen it in action. But I'm not convinced that it's nearly as common as it's alleged to be. Not nearly as common as other forms of child abuse.

Agree. Why is it so easy to believe in an accusation of parental alienation but not physical, emotional or sexual abuse?

(The courts, not you.)

Tacotortoise · 21/12/2023 21:13

daffodilandtulip · 21/12/2023 20:19

Agree. Why is it so easy to believe in an accusation of parental alienation but not physical, emotional or sexual abuse?

(The courts, not you.)

Show quote history

That's easy - patriarchy. Most people claiming parental alienation are men, most alleging parental abuse are women. And traditionally in our society (and many others) a woman's word is simply carries less weight than a man's, esp in law.

InflatableSanta · 21/12/2023 22:06

Tacotortoise · 21/12/2023 21:13

That's easy - patriarchy. Most people claiming parental alienation are men, most alleging parental abuse are women. And traditionally in our society (and many others) a woman's word is simply carries less weight than a man's, esp in law.

Show quote history

Exactly this.

even when I had proved my ex had lied about something huge in relation to the children's safety his version of events was still given more credence than mine. In the end my children had to vote with their feet and refuse to comply with the court order (and thankfully I had a sensible judge when taken to court for the breach)

LorlieS · 28/12/2023 16:41

@Castellanos It's shocking. We waited over a year for our Final Hearing by which time my ex had poisoned and damaged our sons beyond repair 💔

Castellanos · 28/12/2023 22:03

That's awful @LorlieS, really sorry to hear that.
Between the delays and dodgy experts saying whatever they are wanted to say, it's a disgrace. Experts should be independent.

LorlieS · 28/12/2023 22:22

@Castellanos Thank you for saying that. I feel so much stigma as a mum who only sees her sons EOW.
I'm now happily remarried with a toddler but by God it still hurts. I'm a teacher too so with other people's kids a lot.
I try hard not to regret leaving my abusive ex-husband, but losing my children to as "punishment" has been hard. I thought the court system would help me. I was wrong.

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