Found grinder on daughters phone

[Renaxkta]

As above really… I found grinder on my 17 y/o DD’s phone. Has anyone got an idea as to what she might be doing with such an app. It’s for gay men, right!!?

@SomersetBrie
You can imagine what you like.

There are trans, bi and bi- curious men on there too. Also a few women, but not many.

@Ripleysgameface
I pay the bill so I'll do what I like.
awful attitude

I’ll contact grinder with her username and demand the account be taken down as she’s 18. I don’t want her to know I’ve been snooping.

*under 18

@HerMammy
Not an attitude- a fact.

Maybe she is supporting a gay friend who can’t have it on his own phone.

I really hope it’s something like that but I don’t know how that’d work. Men use it to summon men within minutes sometimes.

Who else but her mum would contact Grindr to get her username deleted? She probably has faked her DOB. She'll know it's you and will also just set it up again if she wants. It's not an effective approach.

She's also 17, you can't police everything. You shouldn't be stopping and trust is a huge part of a relationship with teenagers.

If you want to address it you need to find better way.

What exactly is your problem with it? I'm genuinely confused. Maybe she's curious, maybe it's for a gay friend, maybe she's exploring her gender identity and doesn't want to talk to you about it. None of these things would be any of your business at 17 unless she wanted them to be.

And today on 'ways to lose your daughter'...

Hookup apps are notoriously dangerous. I don’t mind her having sex or being queer but I am concerned for her safety.
i don’t want to police everything she does, that’s really really not my aim.

That’s what I am scared of

I can't believe people are checking their 17 year olds phones, they could be off to uni next year if they haven't learnt how to be safe online by now then there's next to no hope of getting it through to them by the time they turn 18

You missed the point. As others have said, TRUST your daughter. Give her privacy, never check her phone again, and forget this day ever happened.

Do you know what CNC means because she had that in her profile as well as HnH

Consensual non consent - it's apparently a kink.

"At its core, CNC involves consenting to role-playing scenarios in which one partner relinquishes control while the other takes charge. This can manifest in many different ways, from light bondage and sensory deprivation to more intense scenarios that involve elements of pain or humiliation."

Hnh - 'Abbreviated acronym for "high and horny", denoting sex with drugs.'

Id be concerned if I found Grindr on my DDs phone too op. My DD was targeted by a grooming gang at 15/16 so that probably colours my view - it's a shit world out there!

Consensual non consent and high'n'horny according to google

According to google, hnh means high and horny. Ie. Sex and drugs

Jeeezus Christ, so I must broach it with her….
maybe a neighbour noticed that someone was operating grinder from our house?
I don’t know anything about drugs apart from they are bad for you. I don’t even know if she’s going to need rehab! And I don’t know who these people are who’ve got her involved in substances

You are just taking the piss now or at least I hope you are.

Do you think he wouldn't be capable of doing that?

On her profile is she posing as a man? Grindr is for men to meet other men so i dont know why she would be on there.