Can men ever really 'get it'?

[MattDillonsEyebrows]

Just wondering after a conversation I had with husband this morning. I am currently studying for an MA, am very behind and have a big deadline coming up. We have a caravan on a site down in Cornwall, and he suggested I go down there for a couple of nights with the dog, to try and bang out my work.

Whilst I absolutely appreciated him saying this, I took a little while to think about it. As I needed to think about how I would look after myself in a largely deserted (due to the time of year) caravan park, it getting dark around 6:30pm, and walking the dog after dark etc. I wasn't catastrophising, more just generally thinking about safety and logistics which I think we all do automatically.

When I tried to explain this to him, he was a bit baffled as he has just been down there with a bunch of his friends and found it fine. He struggled to understand what I was worried about.

He acknowledged he didn't get it, and to be honest I struggled to explain it, as it's just a thing isn't it?

I should add, that he genuinely tries to understand, and he really wants to, if nothing else for our two daughters (5&4). He kind of gets the gender critical stance, and agrees with me regarding that, but struggles to understand why I go on about it so much.

I guess I'm asking is 'the fear' something that can ever be understood by a man?

Why would you assume fatal attacks, thereby ruling out almost all attacks?

The poster I was replying to just used the word ‘attack’. I have no idea whether they meant fatal and non-fatal, or just fatal. Either way my point remains. Comparing the headline numbers of ‘attacks’ on women and men without having more information about the nature of those offences is a completely useless exercise and tells us nothing.

In the UK you’re statistically much more likely to be attacked at home by a partner than in public by a stranger.

The U.K. is a very safe place to be.

Maybe we should stop trying to terrify women.

It’s reasonable to avoid some areas, but the risk is massively blown out of proportion.

@MattDillonsEyebrows I’d argue that you see more misogyny because today we live in a culture where some are obsessed with identity politics rather than the world getting worse.

By almost any measure the works is safer and bore equal than any time in history.

We just have a lot of people trying to stir division.

Some stats borrowed from another thread.

The earliest empirical evidence of gender symmetry was presented in the 1975 U.S. National Family Violence Survey carried out by Murray A. Straus and Richard J. Gelleson a nationally representative sample of 2,146 "intact families". The survey found 11.6% of women and 12% of men had experienced some kind of IPV in the last twelve months, also 4.6% of men and 3.8% of women had experienced "severe" IPV.

The 2010–2011 report found that whilst 27% of women who experienced IPV reported it to the police, only 10% of men did so, and whilst 44% of women reported to some professional organization, only 19% of men did so.[29]In a 2005 report carried out by the National Crime Council in the Republic of Ireland, it was estimated that 5% of men who had experienced IPV had reported it to the authorities, compared to 29% of women.

In 2012, two Swedish studies were released that showed men experienced IPV at rates similar to women—8% per year in one study and 11% per year in the other.

A growing body of international research indicated that men and women experience IPV in some similar proportions. An example might be a recent survey from Canada's national statistical agency that concluded that "equal proportions of men and women reported being victims of spousal violence during the preceding 5 years."

In 2013, the American Centers for Disease Control and Prevention(CDC) found that from a sample of 16,000 U.S. adults, 26% of homosexual men, 37.3% of bisexual men, and 29% of heterosexual men had been a victim of IPV, compared to 43.8% of lesbians, 61.1% of bisexual women and 35% of heterosexual women.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_violence_against_men

Women ‘more likely to hit their partners

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/women-more-likely-to-hit-their-partners-wx29qb0nwwg

Women are more violent, says study

www.google.com/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/women-are-more-violent-says-study-622388.html%3famp