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Mental health

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Does any sometimes regret being a Mum?

6 replies

Janos · 03/08/2005 10:59

I feel horrible and evil for saying this but I am feeling like this right now...I know people will shout at me and maybe I deserve it but I'm just so exhausted, lonely and overwhelmed. Not helped byhaving an exhaiusting weekend where we were all poorly - me, DP and DS. Ds is still recovering at home.

I'm not saying I don't love my little DS because I do but sometimes I really wish it was just me. Can't believe I feel like this. Not sure what the point of this thread is but just wondering if anyone else ever feels the same way and does it make me a bad mother.

OP posts:
nutcracker · 03/08/2005 11:01

Yes me, I think most people think that at some point.

SPARKLER1 · 03/08/2005 11:01

I get times when I feel like this too but I would never swap my dds for anything in the world. I find that a bit of time out helps me feel better. Time to clear my head, to do something for myself or catch up on some sleep. When I've done this I feel so much better and it's a pleasure to see the kids again.
Do you get much chance to to do this? Do you have people around to babysit to give you this opportunity?
Chin up - you'll be fine and your sound perfectly normal to me. x

nutcracker · 03/08/2005 11:01

Obviously when I think about it, I don't really rgret it at all, it's just when your having a bad day, it all gets too much.

hamster · 03/08/2005 11:03

It doesn't make you a bad Mum at all. We all have thoughts...."what if this...." . We're only human!

I must admit though, having kids does make you realise just how easy life was before, and how much you took forgranted.

Don't worry! As long as it's just the odd day-dreaming thought now and then. It's when you start to feel like you don't want your life as it stands now, and you hate it, that you need to worry!

Cheer up, you have a family!

Janos · 03/08/2005 11:12

Thank you must admit I thought everyone was going to come on and yell at me.

Sparkler, you ask how much time I get to myself and the answer is not too much because it's just me and DP. It's not that family aren't willing to help but they are too far away - closest family is about 150 miles away. It does get a but much sometimes.

I have a good friend coming up for a visit at the weekend tho so am thooking forward to that.

OP posts:
Caththerese1973 · 04/08/2005 13:09

Hey don't be so hard on yourself. It is impossible not to resent your kid or kids sometimes. They take everything you used to identify with away from you, and more besides! Sometimes you just feel like you're not even a proper person anymore (I know I do).
The hardship you are enduring now will pay off in years to come. You will not regret having a baby in the long term. Everyone thinks: 'shit, what have I gotten myself into!' sometimes, I reckon.
It is hard in our society, where there is no extended and family and so little support for mothers. Most mothers, even married ones(I am a single mum) are more or less on their own with child rearing.
If you are getting really down, can you organise one day off a week for yourself, let you mum mind him or let him go to the local daycare centre (if he is old enough). Don't feel guilty about this. My mum used to mind my dd one day a week and it really made everything seem a lot more manageable. Now I have her all the time and I am FRANTIC for her to go to bed at the end of the day, lol!

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