PND

[CheerfulYank]

Just a question- I had PND from my third trimester until DS was about three months old. It was pretty bad- I never ever wanted to hurt him or anything, like in super severe cases, but I was just always very depressed. I felt...I felt like there was never the chance of feeling happy again, like I would just be walking down a gray hallway for the rest of my life.

I took meds for two months, started getting more sleep and prayed& meditated as much as possible. He's almost 3 now, and I'm as back to normal as one can be after becoming a mother! (I've accepted that I'm always going to be a bit more fearful and nervous than I was before, that's just life with kids isn't it?)

DH and I are talking about another baby. I'd really love it, but am really worried about going through this again. I've heard that for some people it's only something they go through with one pregnancy, which I'm hoping is the case. I also hope that b/c I've been through it before that if it happens again I can remind myself that it's temporary, that I can get help and it will be all right.

Has anyone else gone through this? How have subsequent pregnancies gone? DH and I plan to adopt at some point as well, so if I decide against another pregnancy it's not like DS will be an only child anyway. I would love another pregnancy at some point, but...I'm apprehensive.

Any advice?

I did have PND with every one of my babies and AND with one as well but tbh I have long term depression so it probably isn't representative. Even if I had known I would still have had all of my children and did want more.

I had PND with the first one worse than the second but worst of all this time with number three. I didn't do anything about it the first two times though as I didn't realise I had PND until recently looking back, I just thought it was motherhood! My point is that every pregnancy is different and there is no way of knowing whether you'll have it again, as bad, worse, less so, not at all. Other people might have opinions on this too as I am no expert! But I did go back for more, twice, so it is worth it. I suppose it is the same with morning sickness. You might feel really crap when you're pregnant but people still go on to do it again and again. The advantage you do have is that you will recongise the signs if you do get PND and act straight away.

Thanks for the replies! It's really helpful to hear other people's stories-keep 'em coming.

I'm afraid I'm another one who has had PND both times but then again I've had difficult circumstances both times.

DS1 was born by emergency c-section and taken away to ICU before I could even hold him. I didn't BF him or cuddle him for five days as he was hooked up to so many tubes. He was in ICU for over two weeks. As a result I didn't bond and ended up with PTSD and PND.

DS2's birth was traumatic in a different way in that I had an emergency c-section again (damn those midwives blagging me into trying for a VBAC!) but this time the surgeon cocked it up and cut my bladder in half 'by mistake'. So I ended up with reconstructive surgery blah blah blah. Added to that DS2 has suffered an ear infection every three weeks on average since he was four months old so that's been very trying too.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that each birth and baby are different. So yes you may well get PND again but then again you may not.

The only advantage of getting it a second time is at least you know the signs so you can take action quicker. The first time I buried my head in the sand and as a result I suffered for over two years. This time (fingers crossed) I'm better already and it only lasted six months.

I hope that helps.

It does help, countrylover, thank you.

I'll just have to...give it a try I guess. Or not, we'll see.