How do I toughen myself up? I'm such a wet lettuce!

[Disenchanted3]

I can't take any kind of cofronatation or rejection. I constantly feel like people are looking down at me thinking im soft, weird, young(!) etc.

Things that might piss 'normal' people off or just aggrivate them a little makes me want to cry.

Like today, I was in the £1 shop wit my DD in her uggy, I wanted to get out without buying anything and so went to the ques, I stopped behin a lady (olde lady pensionage) and said 'excuse me' she looked at me shocked and then angry and sort of jumped, I asked if I hit her with the buggy (im 99% sure i didnt) she just glared at me so I walked passed and said 'i did say i was sorry if i bumped you' and she just looked away.

I wanted to sob so much.

I just feel so stupid all the time andif anything like that happens I feel like avaoiding the outside world for days!

I know how you feel. I have times where I take all sorts of comments and situations way too seriously - everything feels personal.

And don't get me started about when my H makes comments about my parenting.

I wish I knew how to switch it off. The lower I feel the more those things get to me.

its deffo a state of mind. i got to a place where i just thought fuck it.

seriously

fuck it

withmost situatuions....fuck it

whats the worst that could ahppen is another train of thought

you hitold lady with buggy - you said sorry ( if it dd happen at all) she glared - you did the best you could fuck it

fuck it fuck it fuck it

you need to also accept that there are some fucking weirdos out there

i agree with custy.

what strangers you will never see again think of you, matters not a jot

try doing some affirmations.

looking in the mirror and saying something like ' i am a worthwhile, decent person'
'i am an excelletn mother'
'i am a great friend'

etc etc etc

repeat a few times, do this regularly, you will start to believe it and then feel stronger and more together IFYSWIM

negative self talk ' i'm useless,i'm pathetic' etc perpetuates you feeling useless and pathetic

try to break the cycle of telling yourself you are rubbish

you're not ! you cope with a lot and do a great job

I always lover your advice, you should get Frankie style MN tshirts printed 'Custy says 'Fuck it'

Its just confidence, I have none, so if anything knocks me then im into minus confidence! and it feels like the whole world is looking at me.

OP, I feel the same as you. I think lots of people (women) do; it is well hidden most of the time. My mum is the same and she is 55 now so not much chance of growing out of it either! I now tell myslef: This is how I am. As a result I am sensitive, a great listener and friend, can get along with anyone and know to avoid situations which are not 'me'. Accept who you are and don't try to be like anyone else. You are not tough, hard or thick skinned. That also means you are probably well liked, self aware and never upset people inadvertenly. I bet there are brash, offensive people who regularay fall out with others thinking "if only I could be more like Disenchanted".

OP, I can be exactly like you describe. Exactly.

I've always been quite sensitive to what other people think and very affected by confrontation (though that doesn't stop me, weirdly!). However, my best friend pointed out that this part of me - the teary, easily upset bit - becomes massively magnified if I haven't slept well. She was completely right. Could sleep be a factor here? Are you knackered?