Can my dd's new bed cause OCDish behaviour?

[Mooj]

Just before Christmas my 9year-old dd and 3 year-old ds got the bunk bed of their dreams. My son has since had to go back into his cot bed because he hated the bunk. My dd insists that she loves it, but has been showing symptoms of OCD behaviour at night-time from the day she started sleeping in it. She can't get to sleep for irrationally fretting about whether her or her brother's heart will stop beating in the night, whether her body is contaminated with some imagined poison, whether some thief will break into our house and take some special possession of hers, whether if a light is left on by mistake it will start her fire. She's fine in the daytime and says she doesn't know why she feels like this at night. It's both wearing and very worrying as I can't bear to see her like this. Gently I try to get her to focus on how she's fretted on previous nights and everything turned out OK. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn't. Should I dismantle and sell the bunk and bring a normal bed back into her room? Or should we see a gp about this? Any help appreciated, thanks.

Upsetting for all of you.

Maybe her little brother not liking the bed has unsettled her?

Maybe he told her he had a frightening dream or something?

Maybe she thinks it's uncomfortable or something but is afraid to tell you?

Is it in a different position in the room from the original bed, so they can't see the lights in the hallway or something?

Did this co-incide with something else, changing school, a frightening movie, an overheard conversation?

Why don't you just ask her if she would like to go back to her old sleeping arrangements...don't make a fuss about it - just suggest they try the bunk next year when they're both a bit older.

Thanks mumonthenet. No it's coincided with nothing traumatic and I've even checked with her teacher at school on this. The only thing that occurred to me was that whenever she felt like a big cuddle at bedtime I could always snuggle up with her for five minutes in her normal bed and I can't really do that in the bunk now. She says it's not that and doesn't ask me to come up (I did a couple of times but it's hard!), but I think subconsciously it may be at least part of the cause of her anxiety behaviour.
Out with the bunk then.

small sensitive children can feel quite vulnerable at bedtime... hope you resolve it.

Thanks for this Pixieonaleaf.

Yes, as I'm answering dd's questions relating to her worries, I often think how very little a 9 year olds knows about the world. I so hope that this is just an anxiety phase that will pass as her understanding of life grows.

And I'll check on the hotness - might be adding to it.

She does have what looks to me like the initial signs of compulsive behaviour such as: it's only the bathroom light that she thinks could start a fire if left on and is forever getting up in the night to check if it is (we never leave it on); she has a special goodnight that she says to her brother so he won't peg it overnight; she has to say goodnight to all her special possessions. But fingers crossed this is anxiety as you say, and I know you know about true OCD from your posts on the OCD thread.

I'll take out the bunk and if she's still fretting for a time I'll see if we can get her some CBT or something.

Thanks again.

I had the same problem as a child myself. It stemmed from library books about the human body. It made me anxious about the doctors too because i was worried I would be seriously ill. Has your child been told or even overheard or read anything about this? I know ocd can be brought on by stress.

Im mentioning this incase it is not because of the new bed but something else that has happened as a coincidence.

Thanks for your thoughts LilQueenie

For all we try to keep traumatic stuff away from her (news stories etc) as she's a sensitive, imaginative child, it's quite possible she's read/heard something from somewhere, even misunderstanding it. I shall try and enquire very gently and discreetly.

Thanks Pixieonaleaf.

We had a particularly upsetting bedtime yesterday with her crying that she wished she didn't worry so much, she feels the negative part of her brain is in control at bedtime. She has a children's book about anxiety which suggests CBT techniques to help - it hasn't helped yet but she wanted to start looking at it again so we're starting it again and see how we go for a few days.

Will report back on the OCD thread.