My DS is nearly 7 months old and I havent felt right since then. I seem to spend quite a lot of time crying, but I thought this was normal after you have a baby. I have just returned from holiday with my mum and DP and DS, which was, quite frankly, a nightmare. I think I ruined it for everyone as I was such a miserable cow. My DP thinks I need to get help, but my Mum told me I was just wallowing in self pity. The thing is, I really cannot snap out of it. In the last few weeks, I have been thinking a lot about suicide, (I don't think I would go that far) which is starting to make me feel really frightened. I also can't get morbid thoughts out of my head (ie, something happeneing to DS/DP) I obsessively check DS breathing all the time. I constantly doubt my ability to be a good mother to my son, which is compunded by the fact that he won't eat at the moment, and is losing weight. I feel like such a failure.
I don't really know why I am posting here, but I thought it might help. Sorry to gush. I am just feeling a bit sorry for myself.