i had a really tough few years, which now look like they're completely over: i've got a new relationship, moved out of the toxic one, have got my own business (instead of being employed in increasingly shitty positions with shitty bosses/colleagues.
so, basically, i think i've spent a very significant chunk of my life angry at everything, all the time.
in my own brain, i haven't felt angry for about 5 months, and i feel incredibly secure and happy in my own world and with everything around me.
but i keep having outbursts of rage: like if a driver does something daft, or if something is annoying: things that a few months ago would make me really really angry inside. but even when i do it, i don't feel angry: i might feel a bit annoyed, but not enough to justify the reaction that i have. i can feel that it doesn't bother me.
(sorry this is now really long!)
my question is: how long will it take before outbursts of rage aren't second nature reaction? how long before i can relate a daft action or tell a story of someone's behaviour without ranting about it?
it just doesn't feel like me anymore and i want to stop doing it!