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How can I understand/help sister with OCD?

11 replies

Mammina · 10/12/2009 18:02

My sister has just been diagnosed with OCD - she says she's been suffering for 20 years but has kept it quiet until now. She has horrible thoughts and is terrified she will harm her children. The psychiatrist has recommended she takes medication for 2 years (don't know why 2 specifically), but she is due to start a 10 week course on CBT next week. I can't help but think she should hold off medication until she's done the CBT to see if she can cope without...?

She hasn't gone into much detail with me so can someone explain to me how the illness works, and what I can do to help

thanks

OP posts:
hohoholepew · 10/12/2009 18:05

I've been reading up on this, my DD has it. I think the medication is needed to bring the person out of depression so the therapy can work. From what I understand about CBT the sufferer needs to be able to help themselves too.

hohoholepew · 10/12/2009 18:07

I have found this website helpful.

Mammina · 10/12/2009 18:12

thanks, will have a look. do you mind me asking if your daughter is on medication, and does it seem to help?

OP posts:
hohoholepew · 10/12/2009 18:21

No she doesn't need medication, but my friend's sister has had CBT, which hasn't worked, and the therapist wants her to take medication to pull herself out of depression a bit more. My DD has had it less than 2 months, 2 years is a long time i hope she can get help.

hohoholepew · 10/12/2009 18:23

There's a bit on here about why medication maybe needed.

Mammina · 10/12/2009 18:25

she's had it 20 years not 2, poor thing I can't believe she's been going through it all by herself. it's good that you know about your DD's condition

OP posts:
hohoholepew · 10/12/2009 18:27

Sorry meant to type 20 [hits keyboard]

lilyofvalley · 14/12/2009 14:03

Hi
I have suffered from OCD for 15 years. The illness basically involves the person having a compulsion to do things that they believe will prevent them from harm. For example washing hands frequently, or doing a set pattern of things for example switching the light off 5 times. The person experiences anxiety until they perform the ritual that they believe is cleansing. They also have intrusive thoughts about imagined danger etc.
I have been treated succesfully with cbt. I have not taken medication because I didnt want to. Each case is different and I think medication in conjunction with cbt is supposed to be helpful.
I'm never going to be free from OCD but I have periods where I feel almost normal. OCD flares up at times of change/ stress. The birth of my daughter has caused me to have relapse.

Best luck to your sister. It can be controlled and you can regain your life. Cbt may seem hard going but you have to go through the anxiety to get better.

lilyofvalley · 14/12/2009 14:13

forgot to say. My husband has been a great help with OCD. The most useful thing I found was that he has to be my supervisor almost. So I feel the need to wash clothes/hands unnecessarily and he helps by stopping me. He is an example of 'normal' and I have to copy what he does rather than do my silly rituals.
your sister will probably realise that her thoughts/actions are irrational but she will have no control over them. It may be worth you going along to her cbt session to see how you can help her.
In the case of OCD you almost have to be cruel to be kind. My husband stopped me from washing something and I felt great anxiety at the time but it later subsided and I realised that it was ok not to have washed.
Some of cbt works by exposure therapy. The person is gradullay exposed to their fear and their anxiety goes up but over time they learn to deal with the fear.

proudestmummyever · 19/12/2009 23:35

Hi, I wanted to reply to this, as I too suffer from severe OCD and depression, always had the ocd but was mild until a few months before my dd was born(she is nw 8),(I knew I was having a girl a few monthsbefore she arrived), I thought I was going mad, literally, I had horrific thoughts regarding my baby and was so terrified to tell anyone, as I though they'd take my baby girl from me when she was born...but obviously it worsened when I had her, I didn't properly bond straight away and didn't feel tha rush of love when she was born, hate thinkng of that now, as I feel terrible about that, although I know now I was seriously ill, I finally admitted to my parents when she was 2 mnths old about the thoughts, and honestly believed my mum and dad would HATE me and take her from me, but they just started crying and hugged me, they had no idea how I had been feeling, my mum went straight on the phone to my GP and I was seen about an hour later, I was then referred to a psychiatrist, but at the time they said severe PND , but I knew it was OCD , said this to psychiatrist and he said MILD OCD, I was put on citalopram, worked up from 20mg to 60mg, my partner knew nothing about it(I felt I couldn't tell him),he left when my dd was 13 weeks old, and this made things much worse, I suffered these awful thoughts on and off for about 4 years.

In between this I had 2 miscarriages,to my current partner of 7 years(we have been together since my dd was a year old), then in 2007 I had my darling ds, who is now 2.9 years old, and when he was born I DID have tht sudden rush of love and for tht I felt guilty because I didn't have this with dd, but then I hadn't been ill through my pregnancy this time , we were just glad after 2 miscarriages that our baby was here, I felt great, despite an emergency c section, then 2 weeks after I had him....BANG!!!!!!! Was hit with those crippling thoughts again but this time a thousand times worse...I couldn't even hold him without thinking I was gonna do the most horrific things to him........it was awful,the gp put me on prozac which did nothing, then put me on citalopram again, my kids and me went to stay with my mum and dad for a week and basically my mum took over, I was very ill, at the May weekend my dad had to rush me to a and e as i was soo bad, they were gonna admit me to the psychiatric unit but no one was there over the holidays to do admissions, they sent me back home with my dad with diazepam, which helped for about 2 hours, and in that time I could bond with my ds, strangely I only had the thoughts bout my ds and not my dd, so I was referred to a psychologist, I had to force myself to go home in between ths and deal with the kids along with my dp, but he had to work, but I was so bad he had to take compassionate leave..

I saw the psychologist, who was a woman , and she was a godsend, within a fw minutes of being in the room she diagnosed severe ocd, and slight PND. After a few visits I saw things much more clearly and she was completely unshockable, I couldn't have gotten through without her....I still do get the thoughts from time to time, usually when I am stressed, but I now know how to just brush them off, but sadly since my son was 10 months old he was diagnosed with severe epilepsy, after the hospital finally did tests after us keeping on at them since ds was a few weeks old(he was having seizures then), and over time he has been diagnosed with a very rare genetic disorder affecting his chromosomes, he has brain damage(which is where the epilepsy comes in), he is severely delayed, can't sit up, or walk or talk and may never do these things, he has seizures daily, but despite ths my ocd hasn't been too bad , but I am still on citalopram and diazepam, but tht really is to help me deal with my ds's problems...pls tell yr sister to be strong, I am here if you need to talk anytime, I would also recommend the book "The Imp Of The Mind" , it helped me a lot, hope things are ok, and sorry about the long post xx

deaddei · 28/12/2009 16:14

DD (13)had CBT earlier this year, which helped enormously but recently new symptoms have emerged, which means she'll have to get some more treatment.
I agree with Lily about being cruel to be kind- we have to be quite firm about some of her issues- if she obsesses about ds having a chocolate (she worries about him being sick)we tell him to have 2.
Over Xmas she has become very depressed and has been self harming, because she has googled OCD and read she will always have it in some form.
I'm going to try some relaxation techniques in the New Year as she is a bag of nerves at times, and they may help.
Hi to hoho.....

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