Please or to access all these features

Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

OMG just googled out of curiosity and my dh is classic, personification of passive aggressive....

5 replies

dandycandyjellybean · 17/05/2009 16:12

someone has PAPD if he displayed five or more of the following behaviors:
(1) procrastinates,
(2) sulks or argues when asked to do something he doesn't want to do,
(3) works inefficiently on unwanted tasks, (4) complains without justification of unreasonable demands,
(5) "forgets" obligations,
(6) believes he is doing a much better job than others think,
(7) resents useful suggestions,
(8) fails to do his share, or
(9) unreasonably criticizes authority figures.

Have heard alot about this on mn, but have passed over it without really understanding what it meant. Must have conveniently passed over it during my counselling training many years ago, and just googled idly on a rainy afternoon as an alternative to doing housework.

Is there a prescribed way to counteract this type of behaviour as a partner, or do we simply have to put up or shut up?

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 17/05/2009 16:16

No . Nobody should put up or shut up!

nametaken · 17/05/2009 16:37

I meet those criteria, it wasn't until I joined mumnet that I actually realised I was passive-aggressive and so is my mother.

Is it really terrible then? We've all got our faults haven't we?

dandycandyjellybean · 17/05/2009 16:52

So, what do you suggest ilT? Do you have any experience yourself of dealing with a p/a person? It's just that it is impossible to talk to or reason with that person if they do not want to (which is any time you want to discuss anything that might involve change on their behalf of any description...) or I have found it so, but perhaps there are some techniques out there that do work...[hopeful emoticon]

OP posts:
dandycandyjellybean · 18/05/2009 10:13

can anyone help?

OP posts:
GentlyDoesIt · 18/05/2009 20:49

Discussion earlier this week, might be worth a look

New posts on this thread. Refresh page