One of my dear friends is in a pickle.
For fifteen years, he has been wondering if he is gay. Writing it down actually makes it sound trivial but he's really distressed by all this.
He loves women. He loves sex with women. The love of his life so far is a woman but he now feels he can't get into a relationship with anyone until he knows for certain whether he likes men.
He feels like he's messed up a few women emotionally because he cannot for certain say that he will be with them. Fidelity isn't an issue in itself - it's the making sure a woman is what he wants.
He has tried sex with a man once and wasn't that into it but still he wonders if that was because of the man in question (one night stand) because the gay issue still preys on his mind. It's like a huge iceberg of doubt, he says.
He's been seeing a counsellor for a year now but feels like he's just going round in circles with this. He's at a point in his life where he wants to come to terms with whatever his preferences are but needs help to do it.
He wants to be happy and live life to the full. Meanwhile, he's worried people are going to find out before he's ready and dealt with it himself.
Can anybody make any suggestions as to where he might go for help? A different type of counselling perhaps?