I'm writing about my good and oldest friend who I know is terribly depressed and agoraphobic I think although she doesn't / won't talk about it.
She never goes out, doesn't work, my DH thinks she may be anorexic too (his ex was).
She only sees me because my parents live near her parents' house so I pop in when I'm visiting them, she's never keen to see me although she is happy to talk on the phone sometimes, just says "she doesn't mind" if I go over. But she doesn't see anyone else at all, her mum and dad are elderly and just seem bewildered by her, and there isn't anyone else for support.
It has just got worse and worse over the past few years and this week trying to talk to her has been so difficult, it is as if she can't remember how to converse with someone face to face. Just shrugs in reply to any question. No eye contact, mumbles.
I don't know what I can do, if anything, but I was looking at some old photos and just cried at the changes since back then. She used to be really popular, have fun, laugh... I just want her to be happy and she clearly isn't.
How do people change when they've been ill like this? How do people get better? Can I suggest things?
Am I making things worse by trying to make her do things? Like saying I'd like her to visit me? I don't usually push it at all, but this week I tried for once and said I'd love her to get to know my kids better and come spend a week with me and she just walked off and left me in her living room and I could hear her crying upstairs, she wouldn't answer the door and I had to just go.
It sounds so awful writing it down and I can't imagine how it has come to this. She's never seen a doctor, she doesn't want to. What can I do?