Oh god i feel awful

[HandbagCrumb]

Sorry it's me again(namechange)

I am crawling with anxiety (it comes in waves all over me
Last night even though i felt ok when i got into bed i started to be conscious about my breathing and it got harder to breath and then i thought that i might actually stop breathing.

Today i have taken on too much again and i don't know how i will get through another 4 shifts at work(2 different jobs)

Don't even think about it being four shifts! Think about no further than the next 24 hours and how to cope with that.

Make a list if it will ehlp of what needs doing or order it through in your head; be ruthless, ditch the stuff that can wait and most of all be kind to yourslef

I think i will have to cancel some of my shifts(with other company) but i have let them down before when they have wanted me(i'm bank staff)so i felt i had to say yes but i know i am very ill atm and wont cope.

Dont know how i can get out of it.

is there someone you can explain to at the company where you are doing the bank shifts, that you are ill - though you dont need to say what/why?

Is it possible for you to see your doctor and be signed off while you get things back on track?

Peachy's right - you need to be kind to yourself and get some space to think / sort.

ditto - get yourself signed off if at all possible.

Am about to do the same - also panic stuff. its bloody horrible isnt it...

Have you explored why this is happening with a healthcare professional? I found my health visitor was very good when my children were all U5 at pointing me in the right direction to get help. I just needed someone to talk to to get things moving.

I have chronic depression and anxiety

I dont take meds

My main employer (i work for a family)dont know about my history because i was recruited by a company (they know)that act on behalf of the family.
They would never believe that i am so ill.I am very very good at hiding it and being happy and perky is v important in my job.

I have just collapsed into a heap sobbing so i think dp know's that i am very unwell.
I will have to get him to call the bank company and explain
They probably wont want me again now.

Also i do not get sick pay so i have to work.

what a sad situation.
I don't think it is necessarily the case that "they wouldnt want you again" - everyone is entitled to be ill sometimes fgs...
umm, if you need to be off, contact tax credits and see if they can help? sorry i dont know for sure, but sometimes they can?
Look, really you have got the ball rolling and you realise that you are quite unwell. But as you will know, each time depression gets you, it has one less weapon to hit you with and you are much much wiser
(and one day I'll listen to my own advice as well)

Thanks

oooh ((hugs))
has something triggered it off - overwork?

Hi
Not sure what triggered this particular episode no.
In the end i forced myself to call the bank shift job because i wanted to explain(i don't like letting people down)I ended up sobbing down the phoneso i think the manager knew i wasn't bluffing.So some pressure is off for a while at least.
I am very angry with my parents though and their lack of support.They help in practical ways like will do ironing if i'm bad or get a bit of food in.But they never ask me if i want to go for a coffee or take my youngest off me for a while(even an hour).I really struggled today with her and she was acting up because she could.
No point saying anything to my parent's as they will just get funny and cause a fight.at the end of the day they have time for everyone except their own child.