Sitting at desk wanting to cry

[Sunshine78]

My dd has had alot of health problems and spent alot of time in hospital (she is only 2) took her to ENT doc yesterday as lastest problem is glue ear which is making her deaf and thus delaying her speech. Doc said to leave her till April as might clear itself. I feel I've let her down as I didn't push soon as I thought there was a problem with her speech just thought her ill health was to blame and it would soon develope secondly that I didn't push doc to do more yesterday.

On top of this my dh is in business with 3 others he has not taken a penny from the co since dec and we are living on savings (as are 2 others) the other one insists on taking his as he never saved any - I know its none of my business what other people spend their money on but he smokes, rents a top of the range TV for £40 quid a month, plays poker (and I know he doesn't play for pennys) and takes his 20 year old girlfriend out all the time (he is nearly 40), buys lunch instead of bringing in from home, so I am a little pissed off as he has no dependants and claims he cant cut back any more - think if he let me try I could find a few things to cut back on! His selfish attitude is putting even more pressure on my DH but as they are a LTD and technically therefore employees there is not a lot he can do.

Due to above I have to work (and do extra hours) in order that we have some money coming in. I would love to give up so I can give my dd the attention she needs.

Sorry for rant but I am sitting at my desk unable to rant and people I work with or cry as they will think I'm just mad again.

You haven't let your little one down. You're doing your best for her and that's all you can do.

Can your DS and his other partner take advice about the other guy about getting him out or asking that he buy them out. He sounds like an arse with how he's behaving. It may not be your business how he spends money but he's taking a salary from the company when the others aren't - very unfair.

I know how you feel about sitting at work, needing to cry and not wanting to infront of people. If you can, try to go for a wee walk at lunchtime and if you find somewhere quiet, cry your eyes out if you need to.

Hope yyou feel better soon and you're not mad.

thanks gscrym - feeling a bit better now went to kitchen to get water and have abit of space. Have emailed one of the other partners today who is the one who's job it is to do the day to day running saying how unfair it is and the added stress its causing - we'll just have to see what happens.

Sunshine - lovely name. I had a period when work was getting me down (so not the same as your situation) but I found something that really helped. I kept a list of things that made me laugh (memories of funny events, a film, comedy act etc) on the side of my PC. Sounds daft, but they were like positive anchors. I could glance at it when things were getting too much and it would kind of break my mood.

As far as the Ltd co is concerned, there is absolutely something the other directors/shareholders can so about it. If the 4 of them have equal shares, they other 3 have the majority - obviously won't be pleasant, but he can be dealt with.

Sunshine - re the glue ear, we have had problems with ds - except his were mainly a constantly weaping ear - I had to really press to get referred and eventually saw someone - unfortunately ds has a perforated ear drum that appears to be unlikely to heal on its own. Anyway, he has glue ear in the other side, just to add to the fun. We found dairy free (certainly cows milk free) helped ds to be less congested generally - he was on goats milk for about 18mo, but now he is nearly 4 he seems to be fine back on cows milk. I also took him to a cranial osteopath which also seemed to ease the congestion.

My consultant has said to us that he doesn't want to fit grommets unless he really has to - this, having had the experience of dealing with dh (many years ago) and fitting him with grommets - dh had to have 4 lots in all - not good.

We are hoping that ds grows out of the glue ear - then we only have the perforated ear drum mending operation to dread when he is a bit bigger...

If your dd is in nursery or had a cm, I recommend printing some info off about glue ear and letting them have it - particularly relating to how you should be assisting a child who has glue ear - making sure that they are aware that you are speaking to them before starting, speaking clearly etc.

Thanks mistle have just started taking her to a cranial osteopath so fingers crossed it will work (an expense I could do without but she needs it) Her nursery are aware and try to help her - I guess you just want your dc to be healthy and not have problems.

Sameagain - if it was up to me I would vote against him but my dh seems to be the only one tough enough to do this and the others just dither about - one has family with money and doesn't mind asking for a hand out and the other's income is the 2nd income so they have alot of money coming in. I dont get paid alot and do as many hours as I can but there are only so many hours in the day!