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Can someone with experience of alcoholism please come talk to me?

1 reply

TheWomanWhoAteTraffic · 27/10/2008 09:24

I am worried sick about my friend and seem to be the only person left who cares. She has two young children, but they are living with her Dh at the moment, she has moved out of the family home as she was on self destruct and it was causing so many problems.

We've talked so many times and I understand she started drinking heavily after the birth of her first child. It went from half a bottle of wine in the evening to a bottle before lunchtime and whatever she could get throughout the rest of the day.

This was all kept completely secret, though I admit we did worry when on nights out she would become almost falling down drunk after just a couple of hours. Then it came to a light when her DH started finding bottles, both empty and full in odd places around the house. He's lovely and was really gentle with er and tried to help her, but it carried on.
One day her DH came home early and found er asleep in an armchair surrounded by empty cans and the DC were wandering around the house naked, and the place was trashed. We all urged her to go to her gp but she refuses as she is scared of SS involvment.

Similar things happened and it was decided she would move in with her sister until she sorted herself out. But her sister is finding the same things happening.

I am so scared for her, she had such a brilliant life and I just want to make it better, but I know you can't force help on anyone. What on earth can we do?

OP posts:
Northumberlandlass · 28/10/2008 08:32

I'm so sorry for what you going through, watching someone you care about self destruct is awful. My FIL was an alcoholic and my DH witnessed his DF demise. Everyone tried to talk and encourage FIL to get help, he didn't. At the time, I didn't understand - I thought he musn't care at all about his family otherwise he would make the effort to go to his GP for help. But, he had lost sight of everything and all that mattered was the next drink. To be fair to my FIL, he was a functioning alcoholic (well, until he got sick), he went to work etc.
I'm pleased that her DC are living with her DH and that they are not witnessing her actions. I'm really not sure what advice I can give you. Just a [hug] - all you can do is encourage her to go to the GP and discuss her problems, maybe offer to go with her. I'm sorry I can't be more help.
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