feeling pretty low today....

[Titania]

for one reason or another. I'm here on my own with the kids. I miss my dog the place is so quiet without her. ds1 has been yelling at me all morning saying he hates me for taking the dog away.

It's 10 years today since the day I was supposed to see my father for the first time in ages but he died before I got to see him on the same day.

DH is at work. I am so tired and feel really really fed up....Ive tidied upstairs and done 3 loads of washing and ironing, got the kids dressed and fed and done the dishes but thats about it. I have got nothing to do today. I know I should make the most of it but I can't. The dog going has halved my workload....I know I should be grateful in a way but I hate it...I hate the silence and not knowing what to do with myself

I have no energy and I feel so very very lonely........

she has been and gone now....i really do need a bath and to wash my hair as well....not sure when I am going to do that though.....

Have seen your posts before but can't remember if I've read how old your children are?

hi Titania, sorry your feeling down, how about liting a candle for your dad when the kids have gone to bed {{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

they are 5, 3 and 1 TMP

Quite young then! Do they sleep well at night? Have to say thats about the only thing that is easy with my 4, they do all sleep. Hope you can find a good way to remember your father. The idea of a plant/tree in your own garden sounds best to me. Don't really know how you feel, only one of my nan's have died in my lifetime. My children are going to find it very hard though. they have 3 great grandparents aswell as mine and dh's parents. the grandparents are very old and unwell.

yes they sleep ok.

I am going mad now.....ds2 and dd are both crying cos they are tired and grumpy....ds1 is just being a pain backchatting and being defiant about everything.....DH is still at work..... Am sat here in tears now

Heh, that is really tough - such a loss and not being able to say what you wanted to him in person.

The only suggestion that I can think of is to plant your rose or tree in his memory and maybe put a letter in, as you plant, telling him how you feel, what you had planned for that weekend, about your kids, anything and everything that you would have liked to have been able to share.

It sometimes helps me to put things on paper and knowing that no-one else will read it, you can say absolutely what you need to.

Sorry this weekend is so painful for you - survive as best you can.

Oh Titania don't know you well but am sending big hugs to you

Do you try talking to him either out loud or in your head? I talk to my dead grandmother when I am missing her. I don't know that I believe in an afterlife but that doesn't really matter at the time.

i talk to him all the time.

am off to bed now....am exhausted and got a dvd to watch so going to snuggle under the duvet and watch it.....

Not got long for a post and I'm sure everyone's already said this but big hugs!!... it's always a shock when a beloved dog dies and what happened with your father is even more of a shock (don't know why I put them in that order, sorry!)... I know this won't make you feel better, but it's totally understandable to be feeling bad right now xxx

(Hope you have a nice night's sleep!)