Am I depressed lazy or just useless

[espares]

Hi
I have been like this for some time but this is how I am.
I have no motivation to clean the house and spend most of my day messing around on the computer.
Simple everyday tasks such as goign to the post office, bank etc seem like too much effort at times, I can,t be bothered to do any laundry, ironing etc.
I don,t seem to be able to concentrate on things and information doesn,t seem to sink in properly without people having to repeat what they are saying.
I have no motivation to go to work as I simply just cannot be bothered and seem to lack the ability to be interested in a job.
I am on the sick at the moment from my job working 2 nights a week as I have not been feeling well with really bad fatigue and I feel too tired to do my night job which is also quite strenuous.
I feel desperately lonely at times as I suffer from really awful shyness and have never managed to make any good friends to share outings with etc I spend all day on my own unless I see my mom and dad.
I find parenting my 7 year old ds too much to take he is an only and can be quite awkward and demanding and I always dread picking him up from school as he has to spend time with a mom who has no motivation for anything, I love him to bits but don,t feel I am giving him my all at the moment.
I am also suffering fertility issues at the moment which seem to have made me much worse with everything.
I spend alot of time just crying for no reason and lots of things will spark me off like things in the news such as a child dying.
I do have a dp but he just seems to think I am crazy for the way I am and he carries on in his own sweet world.
I have horrible thoughts for the future such as something bad will happen and I worry about my dp or ds being killed in a car accident or something like that, my parents are elderly and I cannot imagine the day that they are no longer here.
I worry about ending up on my own due to my inability to make friends.
Can anybody relate to what I say or am I just barmy.
I constantly worry about my only ds as I feel my shyness is bad for him, and it must be hindering his chances of a good social life and network of friends.

you sound depressed to me, it's worth having a chat with your GP

I used to be almost exactly as you are now (and still get a bit now and then.)
I think you are definitely depressed, and should go and see the doctor. Even if you don't get counselling or drugs of some sort (as I never have), I found talking to someone who understands that I can't just "pull myself together" really helped.
I think that you need a chat with your dp, to give him the oppotunity to be more supportive. He probably doesn't realise how low you feel at the moment.
I found that during those days where I couldn't bear to leave the house and sat in a corner crying with a blanket round me, if I forced myself to go out, I would feel all the better for it.

Definitely NOT useless! You do sound depressed to me. Please DO go to your GP.

Don't try to tackle everything all at once, but set yourself small targets.

I have the social skills of a hedgehog, and relate to a lot of what you say, even when I'm NOT feeling down.

espares...
You definitely sound depressed to me. I have had several periods of severe depression so I lived through many of the symptoms you've described.

Firstly...
Get yourself to your GP, if he/she prescribes anti-depressants (AD's), take them! Think of them being like a crutch to help you heal.
Secondly...
Ask to be referred to a mental health professional be that a psychologist or counsellor. The AD's act like a crutch to help raise your mood so you can start to search for solutions.
Help from a therapist is needed to help with the root causes of your unhappiness.
Thirdly...
Try to help yourself. Read up on depression...
A good book is Overcoming Depression
Also think about how your fertility problems re contributing to your low mood (my sister is going through IVF and has been for 6 years, it has seriously affected my sister and her DH ) Fertility difficulties alone are very very stressful.
Fourthly...
Think about your social anxiety. I suffered from crippling social anxiety for years. That in itself led to my bouts of depression. You can overcome that! Look at the Social Anxiety UK Website for some help.

Hope some of that helps x

Yup- you're depressed alright. PLEASE talk to the doctor and good luck!