health anxiety taking over my life

[kaylasmum]

Hi i have suffered from depression and health anxiety for some time now and i think that the anxiety is getting worse. I posted on another thread recently about my 20 month old ds having a lump on his back and having an x-ray which has come back fine but still waiting for an ultrasound which is due on 22 september. Its been almost 3 months since he was seen by my gp and referred to the hospital, this has been 3 months of total panic and fear. And also over the last week i've managed to convince myself that i have ovarion cancer and that my dd has luekemia as she has a lot of bruises on her shins. I know this makes me sound like a raving lunatic and that most normal people would'nt automatically assume the worst, but when i feel like this i find it so hard to think logically. I went to my gp last week as i thought i had a urine infection and googled and a lot of the symptoms of ovarion cancer fitted mine. I broke down at the gp's and told her that i really need help, as a result she is referring me for CBT and has increased my anti-d's to 40mgs from 20mgs.

Living with health anxiety is hell, i just want to be happy and not scared all the time. Has anyone had CBT and if so has it helped?

TIA.

Hi Kaylasmum. When's the last time you had a really good laugh? When was your funny bone last tickled?

I suggest you look for laughter on the Internet (try MN Only Joking threads)and give medical sites a wide berth.

I do not think your anxieties about health are silly; they are rational fears. Sorry you have to wait for so long for your baby's scan. Do you have a dp/dh to share that worry with?

I had CBT for health anxiety and yes, it did help

I still find it hard esp if I am tired, but it has made a lot of difference

and it wasn't painful!

hth

thanks for your replies, i do have a laugh with my family and friends but there is always this underlying anxiety and fear, especially just now, waiting to find out about my ds. We saw the consultant 6 weeks ago and he said as it was non-urgent then it would be 6-8 weeks for the scan. This has'nt helped my anxiety at all, just made it so much worse. I feel on edge all the time. Even though 2 gp's, the consultant and another doctor at the hospital have all said they don't think its anything serious with my ds i still can't stop worrying and getting myself into a panic. I do have a partner but he is much more reserved with his emotions.

Hi kaylasmum, I have spoken to you before a while ago (though I think I have namechanged since then).

I have very bad health anxiety too, and I know how hard it can be to live with.

My gp has recently got me to try this themoodgym.

It is basically online CBT and I have been finding very helpful, maybe you could give it a try, as I know wait lists for CBT can be very long.

Good luck.

You are not a lunatic. You are suffering with anxiety, which is being treated and you can learn to manage. I have been there and I know how horrible this is. I haven't had CBT but did have ads and counselling and I am now pretty good most of the time.

Of course you are going to be worried about your DS (understatement). And until you are certain he is OK, you are probably going to carry on feeling anxious about this. Can you maybe try and accept this? Don't pressure yourself to feel happy and positive all the time - allow yourself to be worried for now.

When it comes to your own health, believe me you are not alone. Remember I said that I was pretty good most of the time - I had a short attack of double vision the other week. I googled it. Within 5 minutes I'd decided it was brain cancer, or a stroke. I was truly terrified.

I would recommend that you educate yourself about anxiety - the more you understand it the better you become. There are loads of resources online - and keep away from Medical Websites! I'm sure the CBT will help.

Good luck - really. I have been there and I know how bad it feels. But it is anxiety, not the diseases you imagine.

HI All,

Please read my thread on general health....I'm petried of the doctors...any GP's around!!

I too am consumed by health anxiety.
From the moment I wake up it starts.

If you read my thread you will understand my fears...
I am of to the doctors either Friday if I can get someone to have kids or next week.

I have to go for this liver retest...I just have to! I know I have done evrything i was told to do and am totally happy about that. But I have truely convinced myself it's cancer or hepatitis.
I am ruining my life worrying like this.

If anyone wants to chat feel free. I now log on to this to stop myself reading the medical sites. That's what started these panic attacks and anxiety.

I have also suffered from health anxiety. It started when I was in my early 20's but really took hold when I had full blown depression in my early 30's. I too had counselling adn AD's. Have now been off the AD's for 2 years and have good and bad days, although recently I have begun worrying a bit more than normal.

Health anxiety is an illness adn can be managed. It is nothing to be ashamed of adn no one will think you are a raving lunatic.

I hope the CBT and increased AD's help.

Ahh...step one...just booked cover at work for 30th october...I have another hospital app( have botex done because of bells palsy few years ago...even going for that freaks me out!) so I thought well ...just do it...have test done..you've done it before...you can do it again!
I should have gone 6 weeks ago!!! If he said a month...i wouldn't have had time to let my fears escalate so much!!

Well I've done it now. I have made a plan. Just need to get kids sorted for the morning? It's only for the blood test..maybe i should take them? a distraction?...mmm not such a good idea...may have to wait long time for botex jabs...they may kick off...kids are 2 and 3yrs...they can cause a comotion!!!