Has anyone had a depressed toddler?

[tori32]

My dd1 has become increasingly withdrawn. She is constantly tired, has mood swings, will spend hours in bed even if she isn't asleep or curl into a ball on the sofa. She seems to have lost her appetite and doesn't appear to enjoy anything at the moment. She seems anxious alot of the time. She is 2.6yrs old.
At first I just thought it was sibling jealousy but I am starting to think she is depressed. The baby is 16wks and I thought things would settle down but things seem to have got worse.

Tell me I am being ridiculous and that its not possible.

I feel down at the moment because I'm so worried about her. She also hardly drinks anything- lucky if she drinks 2 cups some days.

Maybe you should rule out medical reasons before you worry about mental health issues as I agree 2.6 yrs is a little young for that to be an issue.

Have you visited the GP at all? Surely they would want to do some blood tests, maybe check her iron levels. Have you tried giving her a tonic to help with her energy levels? DD was fairly sickly until she had her tonsils removed recently and a fellow MNer recommended Minadex which seemed to help.

Poor baby girl

A new baby is a very tough adjustment, and yours is still sooo new

I would say. No. she is not depressed she is a normal child trying to cope with some big changes in her life and she is trying to do it without the advantage of years of experience dealing with change. Be gentle and spend some more time, and much as you can and dp can and gps can with her. Not big exciting zoo trips. But making a book together, planting some seeds, quiet gentle things where you can also just chat together and be normal.

The tiredness and mood swings. I wonder if that would be linked to her diet? Maybe cooking and baking and garden picnics could be one of those things someone does alone with her?

I would suggest mentioning it to your hv if they are approachable and you have confidence in them.

Don't know what to say but didn't want you to go unanswered.

I think the first thing I'd do is take her to the doctor for a check up. There may be a physical symptom which is making her miserable.

Are you able to give her one to one time atm? Cuddling up and reading stories while the baby is sleeping? Trips to the park?
Sorry if these sound obvious.

Have you asked her if /why she is sad?

Drinking more would help a bit as dehydration does make you feel naff. Does she like ice lollies? How about letting her choose a new cup? This has worked with mine before.

Good luck.

I cook healthy meals most nights and when she will eat, she isn't fussy with food. Recently she has been turning down food she loves. She has lots of fruit on breakfast, snack and only gets a biscuit if she eats fruit first.
DH does baking with her most weekends just the 2 of them.
DGP etc, all live north of Birmingham and we live in Dorset so they can't spend time with her much.
Thanks for the advice on the tonic, my HV suggested a tonic but didn't remember what it was called. I think I will take her to the Dr ? aneamia.

I have asked her why she is sad and she never answers. Just ignores the question.
Regarding drinking I'm a CM and have tried every trick in the book to get her drinking, new cups, feeding it to her by pretending to be a hamster, big girl open cup,different flavours and even adding fizzy water, just to try to get her to have something. She knows that wee is yellow if you need to drink more and comments on it when she goes for one Makes no difference.

Hmmm. She is very young though.
Maybe just concentrate on making pockets of time for you and her to do special things together. Make sure she's not missing out on cuddles and smiles and talking.
And def speak to doctor or hv.

Sounds like you're doing all the right things Tori - a trip to the GP might be just what you need to put your mind at rest.

TBH I found at that age, DD never really answered those type of personal questions. She's only just started at 3.5 and normally there's a big over dramatic reply involving huffing and puffing and big sighs!

So far as water's concerned - I agree it's important but perhaps she's playing a little on the focus you're giving it. What about her having a special bottle (just an ordinary plastic one with a sports top) she keeps in the fridge which she can help herself to anytime - she's at an age where making her feel like a big girl might just do the trick.

oh bless her.

I would say that 2.6 is very young for depression. yes, of course, she will still be finding adjusting to the new baby very difficult. It is unsusual though, at her age, for her not to be pretty vocal about it, and more obvious, if this were the reason. She's note yet developed the emotional equipment to keep inside for long, or the sensitivity either.

I would have thought there was a more physical reason for her being withdrawn. I'd really take her to the GP for a good check up. possible some bloods, and a examination of her ears, throat, tummy etc... If she is drinking less than half of what she normally does, you need to keep an eye on her hydration. Lack of food ad drink can make a little one feel pretty lousy, sleepy and withdrawn.

I had experience of this myself recently when my DD (18months) was i hospital being treated for meningitis. It was horrible. the most upsetting.worrying bit was her being so withdrawn and floppy, it was amazing how much she perked up on IV fluids.

I'm not suggestig she needs this, of course, but maybe just try encouraging more fluids into her. I was advised to give her any food she might eat, all the 'crap' you would normally not give too often, as well as offering a balaced meal. Also, i bought loads of smoothies, fruit juices, fruitj mineral waters for children, everything! it took us a week or so, as she was quite poorly, but still, now I'm keeping up with it all as she lost alot of weight.

Hope some of that helps

thanks for all your advice and empathy. She seems to have perked up the last day

Agree with others that this is more likely to be an illness than depression - get her checked out by the GP unless she has gone back to her old self again now!