Work is going to shit at the moment and I am feeling so shakey and dodgy in myself, I feel I deserve mega mega punishment and i know thats not safe.
I just wrote a big list of things I want to do to myself and its so fucking grim, I am so disgusting and horrid and awful and stupid and I deserve these bad things.
I don't want to eat because I feel I don't deserve it, I feel just like doing something big and then I won't fail.
I banged my head so hard today that I thought I might faint.
And its all my fault that I feel like this urgh urgh urgh.
Yes I do see someone and I will probably be ok.