Do I have post natal anxiety/depression/ gone crazy?!

[pamelat]

My marriage (of 14 months) is on the verge of breaking up and I wonder whether I have gone a bit mad or have post natal issues

I even know thsat I am being unreasonable

My little girl is 6 months old, its been a difficult time with various issues, mainly reflux and the fact that she is my first.

Never suffered from depression before but I am a fairly highly strung anxious person.

Just got back from 3 days away for a hen do, wasnt sure about leaving her but my husband is brilliant and thought it would do me "good". Just back last night, within 10 minutes of being home we had fallen out massively over our daughter and I was crying, I even told him that I think we should separate (his response is that if we did he would probably kill himself for letting his daughter down so much, and than he thinks I should do too - am sure he doesnt really mean that?)

Anyway it sounds stupid but its over a jar of chicken puree. I can even see how ridiculous that is but the story goes ...

For weeks I have been looking forward to introducing meat to her diet, bought the books etc etc and even spoken to my husband about how excited i am, was planning on making chicken stock etc. Anyway apparently he forgot this and gave her chicken in a jar - I realise it isnt the crime of the century (maybe just a bit thoughtless) Am finding that being on maternity leave, she is my entire life and am very baby baby baby.

I just feel that I have missed out on one of her "firsts", got upset, cried.

The reason I am worried is that this has ended in a big row where we have talked about separation (been together 8 years despite short marriage). I do love him but I feel incapable of 'sharing' her, or at least sharing the control of what she is fed, when, how things should be.

I genuinely think I might have lost it. He has said that I have to spend today considering my mental health and we have to decide what to do.

Normally I would be devasted (and dont get me wrong, I am upset) but part of me wants to just disappear away with mu daughter for a bit, away from family, him and everyone really. Selfishly I want her to myself

Is this because of 3 days apart, because of hormones (period has re started and is currently every 2 weeks) or because I have gone mad. I do wonder whether I have anxiety over missing out, and whether she will love me now that I left her?

I dont want to lose my marriage and I dont really want her to be without her dad. Irrationally I just feel very very hurt that he gave her something that he should have known would upset me? I know I over reacted

[Midge25]

Hi again - sorry for delay in replying - have been away for a couple of days. That plan sounds fine - look forward to seeing you and will commit your photo to memory!

[pamelat]

Hi Midge, if you get this please can you let me know by replying to this thread. Otherwise I will still show up at 10am

My grandma had a heart attack over the weekend, she is stable but am doing a lot of hospital visits and grandad care.

It might be better for me to re arrange meeting until next week. However, will turn up if you dont get this.

Sorry ....

[pamelat]

Hi, am setting off as will walk up.

I can visit grandad this afternoon anyway

See you there!

[Midge25]

Oh no! Just got in - Eva at nursery and am trying to distract myself - and just saw your messages. Feel awful I didn't check before leaving. Hope your grandad is better soon and it was lovely lovely lovely to meet you and your dd and make a new friend. Will be in touch soon x