Just letting out a bit of steam, don’t know if anyone has been through this and can offer any small nuggets of help.
as in the title relative has EUPD, potentially Autistic. Massively complex MH history going back years.
one of their parents died last year, was their preferred parent to confide in.
They have alcohol / painkiller issues on top of the MH. Have also spent quite a bit when in a bad way.
they are currently spending £600 a month in charity shops, this makes the hoarding situation even worse, obviously. Not sure quite how bad as they won’t let me in the house. The problem is they are rapidly running out of money - only income is benefits. They had quite a substantial savings cushion which is nearly gone.
i have asked them
to give me their card so i can control money they have access to and they have refused. Other parent cannot give them any money, i possible could but tbh I won’t while they are spending £600 a month on crap and probably another couple of hundred on food which just sits in bags and goes off.
they started a compulsive spenders group last week but imagine that will take some while to kick in. They have a support worker but the only help from them was to get relative to agree to only buy 4 items a day, as you can imagine that’s done bigger all.
I feel So frustrated, I’m a fixer but they refuse all help full stop from me. Well they only thing they want is me to sell all the crap they have bought but I have a full on job and do not have time, I have offered to show them how to use Vinted, eBay etc so they do that themselves. But they prefer to put the responsibility into everyone else, they already ask other to store things as they don’t have room. They buy me stuff I don’t want and didn’t ask for which I have now given back and made clear I don’t want them buying me anything. They are lonely and like the interaction with the peolle in the charity shop I think.
in around 3-4 months at this rate they will be out of all money and exceeding their overdraft.