Feel so stupid after sharing with a GP my fear of all things medical

[ShorterMumma]

I have avoided face to face appointments for about 10 years.

I've never had a mammogram and not had a smear in about 15 yrs.

It took me weeks but i finally made an appointment with a GP and tried to explain how and why I have such a fear.
I had a hideous experience when i had a hysterscopy and it literally changed me.
She basically said I was being 'silly' and that I couldn't be that bad as I got myself into the surgery (I took 20mcg of propranolol as i was stressed beforethe appointment).

Now my fear/anxiety is worse then ever. Is there any medication I could take just to get me through the appointments?

You need some therapy to help you with your anxiety. Google the details for your local Talking Therapies service and self refer. Therapy can be online or face to face.

That’s appalling that a GP can act with so little empathy and kindness.

I’m so sorry that GP was so ignorant and unhelpful. You have nothing to feel stupid about. It must have taken so much to get to the appointment and I’m really sorry she said you were being silly instead of acknowledging the very real barriers you managed to overcome to get there.

I do hope you can explore self-referring for therapy as this sounds like anxiety and trauma relating to a bad past experience which must be so difficult to deal with.

I too have white coat syndrome. I did tell a GP once. She laughed and said I hope I’m not scary. That really helped. Not!!!!!

Try and see it as the positive that it is. You did manage to get there. You’re better than you were!

Incredibly poor response from your GP. They should know better. If you're in England, you can get help from Talking Therapies as a PP said. You can self-refer, which is just as well given your experience at the GP surgery.