Anxiety and anger flaring up again and partner not helping

[Mancity08]

Hi All

I’m already on ad’s had shit loads of therapy anxiety/panic/depression is not new to me, I’ve had it going on 40 YEARS on/off since menopause it’s stuck around

Need to get this out my system as partner seems to shut down on this subject 😡
Ive been ok-ish for last few weeks but today for some reason I’ve got full on thoughts constantly going round my head and alway anger building up with dp.
we were supposed to have builder starting to do kitchen tomorrow but he forgot it was BH
woke fine, eat breakfast and got ready
i was to go aqua today (new class) so think anxiety was building with that and the builder starting.
This started my bowels off , now I’m finding it really hard to eat ( just managed piece of toast)
I told dp “ I think I’d rather have you here tomoz with builder here” I got a really angry face from him but no answer.!
The atmosphere after this isn’t helping me either

Im trying to do things around the house to take my mind off myself but stomach isn’t letting up and it’s so hard to forget
Even water, as much as I need it turns my stomach

partner Been to tennis this morning
we needed few things from shop and I’d written a list of what was needed. He was just messing on his phone , then made a coffee . This was now 2.30pm , he went into the garage and I just thought” just go to the shop yourself!
Hes fell asleep on sofa , whilst I’ve prepared tea
I need to stop what he is doing/not doing wind me up as it’s doing anxiety NO GOOD 😡
If I speak to him I know I will be snappy as anxiety does that to me - snappy no patience

any suggestions fellow suffers

He sounds horrible. Are you sure he's not the cause of your anxiety?

Ditch the partner.

I suffer hugely with anxiety. I completely get that the builder coming is a worry but it's really not something you can ask him to stay home from work for (Unless he can easily work from home)

I can see why he'd be annoyed with this request.

I’m not sure what he did wrong, apart from not go to the shop when you wanted him to?
Was it planned that he would go to the shop or was it a new ask to accommodate your coping mechanisms?

Sorry guys lots of typo’s in there also predicted text changes

bedfrog
I must say he doesn’t help with my anxiety issues as he is now 71 and sometimes I think he’s in a world of his own and he doesn’t know the word RUSH/get a move on
He also developed this thing were he watches what’s happening neighbours/cars in the street & when who’s going in/out 🤦‍♀️ Drives me mad because he then relates what’s happening back to me . I off course couldnt give a flying f…
He also needs a kick up the a… to see/do housework
Is this normal for retired men (I don’t think I’m over the top)
normal things that need cleaning
bedding -bathroom -stairs -dusting -window cleaning inside
No matter how many times I mention it
“ I’ll do it tomorrow “ never comes

WorkCleanRepeat

Everyone has different symptoms to anxiety
like some people have it but still manage to work and complete a days work
My anxiety is physical also as I can be sick , diarrhoea, and when you e got a stranger in your house

Its not work he’s going to it’s a hobby that is voluntary, he could see I am suffering

Pinkissmart

He wouldn’t give me a yes or No answer when I asked him to stay home and see to the builder himself, rather than volunteer at his hobby when he knew/could see I was suffering

I had made a list of things needed for tea , we normally go together after lunch, but today for some reason he chose to ignore the shopping list and not mention a thing .
fell asleep 💤
Then as I’m driving off , comes to the door and says “ you ok to get the shopping “

Apart from keep reminding him about the house work (draining and he’s not a child to have to keep reminding)
my anger build up was him
putting his hobby before me
and also letting me drive & go to the shop how the way I was feeling

I need to have this out with him again, but the thing is he shuts me down before I’ve even had time to say what I want too
with - “ right, right, I’m not arguing “
He thinks everything is a criticism on him because I bring something to his attention as I’ve probably numerous times before and it’s not been done

Also made tea but havnt managed to eat it , not helping stomach issues being empty

sorry if you think I’m moaning I just had to get it out and feel like I’m talking to somebody ❤️