Please help - partner suicide attempt

[ForPoliteWasp]

Not sure why I am posting really. Maybe just to talk and maybe for people's experiences too?
My partner took an overdose today and I was the one that found him. I am feeling extremely traumatised and just don't know what to expect now.
He has a history of mental health problems and has been on medication for many years. His mood has been so up and down recently and both me and him have questioned whether he has a personality disorder or bipolar etc.
We have two children, whom neither thankfully witnessed anything today.

I have just left the hospital as I am not allowed to stay overnight.

Will he have a mental health assessment before he leaves the hospital? Would he be sectioned? Just dont know what this means for everyone and I am absolutely distraught.

The children are being looked after by grandparents so are completely safe and away from the situation and I am just sat in an empty house feeling completely broken and numb.

Please any advice at all from anyone who has been through this and please please be kind as I am feeling so fragile.

Didn’t want to read and run. So sorry you’re going through this, finding him like that must have been very hard. I don’t know the definitive answers to your questions, someone may be along who does. But when a friend attempted suicide she was assessed and in her case deemed likely to do it again, so sectioned. I think it will very much depend on their impression of his state of mind. Although this was many years ago so not sure of the protocol now.

You mention medication but not if he’s had therapy? IMO it’s the two things combined that is the difference that makes the difference. I know it must feel shocking that he could make that decision, but depression is a cruel illness and warps someone’s perspective, making everything feel pointless, flat and exceedingly painful. With the right therapeutic help and once in a better headspace, they’re often shocked they ever wanted that and very grateful they survived.

if there’s an opportunity to push for longer term psychotherapy for him on the nhs as a result of this (hard to come by I know) I’d try and push for that. In the meantime look after yourself. If you have the financial means I’d suggest therapy for you to help you navigate your way through this, and give you the support you need too.

Thank you for your kind response. He has been paying for private CBT as he desperately does want the help.
It is so sad to see somebody in so much pain that they would rather not be here.
Thank you again for your reply

Hiya I am sorry you are going through this -
my husband was in your position at the beginning of April when I took an intentional overdose. I realised what I had done straight away and panicked and went to hospital. I ended up being admitted to a psychiatric ward as a voluntary inpatient as I said I didnt feel I could keep myself safe if they sent me home. I’m mortified that I did it, I have bipolar disorder and have been struggling for almost a year now with depression, I just flipped out.
so I suppose the question is, did he seek help after the overdose and does he/do you feel confident he could come home and not be at further risk? The psych team will see him and the options will be either that he comes home, they may offer a crisis bed if ones available or he could get admitted to a ward either voluntarily or under a section. they try to avoid inpatient admission where possible due to lack of beds and also (as I now know from firsthand experience) they are not a nice place to be. Full of very unwell people, noisy, restrictive, uncomfortable. But if he needs to be kept safe it’s 100% the best option.
if they were thinking of admission my advice is that if he agrees to go voluntary he will be much less restricted in terms of being able to go for walks, see visitors etc. people under section were literally not allowed out the ward at all for days on end and then it would be 30mins accompanied by staff, that kind of thing. So if he is glad the overdose doesn’t work but does need place of safety then voluntary admission is my advice x

Just to add, they use the term ‘least restrictive option’ just meaning keep
you safe as possible but it’s not an automatic section/inpatient admission. If he comes home he will be supported by the home treatment team so if he came home tomorrow they would do daily visits as a minimum and a psychiatrist would come to the house to see him I think .

Thank you so much for your reply. Sorry to hear of your struggles - are you doing a lot better now?
I think he may have tried to get help as I think he tried to get to his phone, but by that point I think the overdose had already kicked in as I found him on the floor by his phone.
I think if he could voluntarily go somewhere that may be best but I guess completely depends on his state when he wakes.
Do you mind me asking, when you were in hospital, did they look at your meds properly? I.e to make sure you were on the right treatment for you etc
Just scared of them fobbing him off as our experience of the mental health services is not great

I’m getting there slowly but surely thanks x
yes my medication was reviewed and changed. They will definitely do that as a minimum. Hope he/you are ok xxx

How is your husband doing? X

Thank you for asking. He is still under sedation currently. They haven't been able to properly wake him yet.
Just going through so many mixed emotions. Just feel heartbroken.
Waiting is the worst part

🫂 🌷

Ah xxx well I am thinking of you and hope that this can be the start of him getting on the road to recovery. The main thing is that the attempt hasn’t worked and hopefully this crisis will result in him getting the care he needs. Take care of yourself too xxx

So sorry 😔

Once he has physically recovered he will have a psychiatric assessment, and then a decision will be made about his ongoing mental care care. I hope he gets the help he needs x

hi op, i work in mental health. Honestly if he can ensure his safety he is unlikely to be kept in/sectioned. He may be seen by the home resolution team for maybe 2 weeks, they may visit him at home but again this is likely only if he has on good symptoms. If he states he is fine and can maintain his safety he may just be referred to his local nhs services and sent home to be monitored by those at home/gp.
Try googling local men’s servixes, lots of areas have male only special crisis services ran through charities. Andy’s man club does a lot of good work for men struggling with their mental health all over the country.
he should at least seethe hospital liaison team for an assessment of needs before he is discharged. They may look at his meds etc. they should draw up a safety plan, take note of what he identifies as his triggers, warning signs so you can watch out for these.
For you guys at home, search the house remove all un necessary medication etc. Speak to his gp and you can request smaller mediation prescriptions so he isn’t getting 3 months worth of medication in one go, gps can eve just release week by week prescriptions which I know sounds annoying but can save lives. Try and keep his medication yourself and give him it daily so he can’t collect it. Familiarise yourself with the crisis advise line if he feels at risk again, it’s via calling nhs 111. This will allow you to speak to your local first response team and they can instigate home resolution input again, get him seen at a&e or get him a routine assessment etc.
this will also affect you so take some time to care for yourself op 😊

Thank you for taking the time to respond ans your insight. I suppose it just depends on how he is presenting when he wakes

How are you doing? I just wanted to say after reading your thread, I'm so sorry you've had to go through this with your partner. You will have very mixed emotions, so keep it in the day and look after yourself and your children. MH is awful for those that suffer and it takes time and lots of support to get through this. I do hope he recovers well and you get the support you all need to get through this. Don't give up hope.

Thinking of you and hope the future is bright.