SSRI for anxiety/ASD

[OyWithThePoodlesAlready84]

Hi mumsnetters,

I am looking for experiences with SRRI's in women who have ASD (diagnosed or suspected) and if/how this helped with common ASD traits such as (health) anxiety/GAD, and an over active nervous system?
Long story ahead!

I have been struggling for at least 10 years now; all my issues magnified since having had my first baby and post partum depression 10 yrs ago.
Before that I had a a better handle on things but in hindsight I did always have sensory processing issues and generalized anxiety. I thought it was normal and how everyone functioned 🫣.

I have a rather complex diagnosis as I was born extremely premature which has most likely done a number on my nervous system and brain development. Psychiatrist thinks this is what has caused the ASD type symptoms without it necessarily being ASD (official diagnosis pending). I have average/above -average intelligence but struggle with really basic stuff such as keeping on top of household tasks. I also have battled with chronic fatigue since my twenties, possibly also caused by prematurity (hyper reactive lungs and overall sensitive system that is easily overwhelmed)

Have been offered SSRi multiple times but always declined , mainly because I hoped I could figure out how to live a normal life with therapy and suchs, plus I have health anxiety around taking meds so I'm nervous about the side effects.

I don't know anyone with this same set of issues, but was hoping to read about experiences here!
I am especially curious to know how it helped you with symptoms such as overthinking and if it made the anxiety less 'loud' as to be honest, it has ruled my life for at least the past 10 yrs (and to some extent my childrens' lives)

I really want better for them and for myself so am on the fence of finally trying an SSRi...
Thank you for reading it you made it this far! ❤️

It helps a lot with my anxiety

Can you explain how it helps? How has it changed you(r life)?

It helps hugely with the ruminating. Sometimes I could lose hours of a day to it when stressed, rarely happens now. My general anxiety levels are lower, I don't get shaky or a racing heart at simple things like going to the shop. When things go wrong or I feel paranoid about something I don't catastrophise anywhere near as much. I also panic less if something does actually go wrong. I don't feel that high level on edge stress 24/7

@RudolphTheReindeerwow that sounds like a dream to me 😂 So good to hear, thank you for sharing!
The constant ruminating has become so normal for me that I almost didn't notice how bad it has become and how it affects my life. It has completely taken over. I hope I a clearer diagnosis soon to see what kinds of meds will help me. I think I have some sort of OCD, a doctor once described in as mental ocd where you dont have compulsion but compulsive thoughts. I hope SSRI's tackle this too

Setraline started me bleeding vaginally, years after the menopause. I have bad health anxiety too and immediately thought of cancer. I had to wait 7 months for an investigation which was fine, although the consultant was awful.

I actually sounds like you op, sensory issues too. I thought i was just weird.

That must have been scary! I ve read that ssri can sometimes cause bleeding and this is one of the side effects that scare me, as I have a trauma from major hemorrhage in childbirth, and my periods are already heavy enough as they are. So really hope ssri won't have that side effects 🤞🤞. Did the sertraline work for you otherwise?

So did I. And I still think I'm weird but embracing most of my weirdness now. My DS had autism so I want to lead by example how to manage te downsides and how to make the most of the upsides..

Op im sorry I didn't mean you were weird.
Ive just never read anything that is so like me. Ive had health anxiety for about 20 years, getting worse by the year. Ive tried everything...cbt (I have more cbt , referred from the gp, coming up)...paid for private therapy ( am on minimum wage so this was a big commitment from me), went to a roadshow with TV personality therapists, again a big financial commitment, had listening therapy through the NHS, tried hypnosis....basically tried anything to get rid of my health anxiety, nothing, NOTHING has worked. It is the absolute pain of my life...

the other thing that completely resonates with me is the sensory thing...i thought it was just me that has a very restricted diet, issues with itchy clothes, cant wear so many things, cant be in a room with tv on and conversations happening too, really i just feel such a complete oddball with no one similar to myself, its actually almost hopeful to read your post, i always thought id failed or not tried enough with all my therapy and it was my fault it never worked..

Can i ask how you got diagnosed? My various GPs I've seen and talked to have never mentioned ASD or anything similar?

thank you for posting this.

I had very difficult side effects to begin Six weeks in, they helped massively and I wished I'd stayed on them longer than I did.

My advice to you is to start on the lowest dose. I think it might be 10mg tablets so I would use a pill cutter ( easily bought online) and start on 5 mg for a few weeks.

I believe GPs don't tell you enough that you can feel bad / jittery when starting. I believe at this low dose you significantly reduce that and gradually wean upwards.

I'm on gabapentin for severe nerve pain. It kind of helps calm me but it can be annoying taking it 3 times a day. Also a bit drowsy making.

Good luck. I sat try it, try the above approach.

Op. I was born very prematurely and have suffered with being over sensitive and have ocd/depression and anxiety.
I held off taking ssris for years but became so emotional and was ruminating all the time over friendships and feelings of insecurity, that I’m now on 100mg sertraline. Also trying different HRT as Im
sensitive to the one I’ve been taking.
Im awaiting an assessment for ADHD.
Do you think that being a premature baby is a reason for having a very over sensitive nature?
This is really interesting for me!

@JacknDiane Oh don't worry I didn't think you meant to say that I was weird, I just recognize that feeling weird/different is such a key part of being neurodivergent especially when issues are subtle or you are able to adapt/mask and "act" like other people.

It makes me sad to read how much you have struggled and how hard you have worked to get rid of the anxiety and it hasn't helped. I have learned a lot in the past two years about where my anxiety stems from and am hopeful I can treat it better now that I understand.

In my case it seems to be a combination of how I was born (3 months early so born fighting for my life) and my body has never learned to feel safe and relax because of this. Throw in ASD (which may or may not be linked) and it makes me on high alert of things happening in my body while simultaneously not registering other physical sensations such as hunger the normal way (this over and underregistration is common in people with PTSD and ASD)

I don't have an official diagnosis yet as I never felt I needed one but psychiatrists in the past have voiced that they thought I might have ASD. Then two years ago my DS got diagnosed and so many things fell into place for me.
It is worth mentioning that in my DS case, our GP was the one who referred us to investigate autism because we came to her for his (health) anxiety which she rightly recognized as being part of ASD. My DS was also born premature so we will never know if it is our brain development or true ASD but many of the symptoms align and 'preemie brain" isnt a diagnosis (yet).

I think that finding the root cause of your health anxiety is the key to the solution. I have worked through the trauma but my nervous system is the problem and this creates a constant feedback loop (nervous system dysregulation causes so many physical and mental ailments). It's too extreme in my case to try to fix with breathing or yoga or CBT alone so I really need something to dial down the volume and calm my nervous system first before anything can change.

Do you think this can be the case for you? If you are possible ND this already makes causes an overload on your nervous system as we process everything so much more intensely...

Thank you for sharing your experience! I do have a pill cutter (i am on benzodiazepines which I only take very very rarely as they are so addictive, i always cut the 10mg to 5 too) with SSRi i will definitely start in the lowest dose as I am very sensitive to most meds.

Can I asked why you stopped taking them?

Same. I missed a few days of meds and the ruminating started again. I didn't realise how frequent and intense it had been until it stopped then started again.

You sound like me!

Yes I am certain that being born premature does something to your nervous system. I have read a lot about this and experience it first hand with myself and my DS. i have a younger DS too who was born term and he doesn't display the same things. Could be coincidence of course, but when you think of what happens to preemies after they are born (so much stress on little bodies with underdeveloped brains and nervous system!) it is bound to have an effect. I was born in the 80s and back then my mother wasnt allowed to hold me for days. Nowadays they know how important it is to have skin to skin, i saw with my own eyes (on the hospital monitor) how my DS vital signs were impacted when we held him skin to skin, it was incredible!

I also think that being born fighting for your life when you are supposed to feel safe and secure in either your mothers womb or her arms, determines your baseline. We needed to fight to survive and our bodies remember...so we stil fight even when we are safe and sound.

Actually, that is exactly how i feel. I feel im too over sensitive with everything. Sometimes in work i take a beta blocker just to calm me down. Nothing over the top is happening, but im over stimulated and feeling on edge and just needing pulled back and the beta blocker calms me down. But everyone else is calmly going on with their job. Its shopwork for Christ's sake, im not an A&E doctor!!! I just find so much every day things overwhelm me and I really dont know why. You'd never guess if you knew me, im the friendly smiley one everyone gets on with.
Dh cant understand me. He keeps saying I need to stop worrying and I should talk to someone. He is the exact opposite to me. Maybe opposites attract after all! He never worries until he has something to worry about. With me its health, all the time. He used some savlon last week and I was convinced he had/has skin cancer.
Its always cancer to me, always. There's no other illness in my mind anything can be. My mind goes straight to that. I cant deal with the terror of it.
The bleeding i had from setraline terrified me , I told absolutely no one. I was too scared to. I waited 7 months for the investigation and the consultant was awful, he scared me further. He more or less said bleeding post menopause is always cancer. And now every time I pee im checking for blood, every single time. This has been going on for years.
But do you know, the setraline could have made all the difference to me. I know people say it doesn't work quickly but within 2 days I felt the difference, I really did. I just felt lighter in myself. Im not kidding. I never did tell dh anything about trying setraline or the bleeding or the 7 month wait for investigations. He knows nothing. I couldn't admit to him I needed anti depressants. He has never needed them and he doesn't agree with them.
I tried citalopram last year, thankfully didn't bleed, but it made no difference. After a crap Xmas I threw them out, they hadn't helped.

I dont know the answer. Im not sure why I have health anxiety. It could be so many things. Im just not sure.

Just wondering have you had any EMDR therapy? This is a trauma processing therapy

@DinoGherkin Yes I have, multiple times and while the memories itself are not as powerful anymore, the trauma is still locked in my body creating a constant fight/flight response. I think it's hard to emdr trauma that you are not aware of (such as around ones own birth)

@JacknDiane from what you describe it really sounds like you might be on the autism spectrum so I highly recommend reading up on that and maybe look into being officially diagnosed as the diagnosis can open doors to better support (i am not in the UK so unfortunately do not know if it works the same way).

Working in a shop can definitely be overwhelming for people with ASD as there is a lot of stimuli (people, different products, lights, music?) and the constant need to be socially switched on (unless you get to work in the stockroom). It has taken me years to understand I don't cope well in crowded and noisy places and that I love working with people but being sociable depletes my energy. I used to be a teacher in secondary school but always burnt out after 1-2 yrs of working part time.

It also sounds like your anxiety might be a part of this; when you are always overwhelmed its so much harder to think calmly and logically about health issues.
Fear of cancer is also one of my issues, i think in part because cancer can go unnoticed for a while which means it's out of our control (something and ASD brain craves because unpredictability registers like a threat to most with ASD)

Something I think you should do for yourself to feel less overwhelmed by your anxiety is acknowledge that you have a disorder and it is not your fault, and then talk about it with someone you trust. Ideally this would be your husband. My DH is the same in that he worries only when there is something to worry about, but him being that way is just how he is wired and i am wired differently and it's not like we chose to be that way.
My husband is very understanding and it helped us tremendously over the years that i started to actually voice my anxiety to him. I didn't before and i would just stay in freeze mode not really communicating or being snappy whenever i went down the anxiety spiral. Nowadays he knows exactly where I am in my head as I tell him. It also takes away a lot of power of the anxiety when you say things out loud (to someone not being dismissive).

My DS with ASD also has health anxiety and as young as he is he is already developing healthy coping strategies (such as distracting himself by reading or drawing) and he knows he can always talk to me about his fears because he knows I take him seriously, i always reassure him that we are taking care of him and that if there is something wrong we will notice and take him to a doctor if necessary. He trusts that we are looking out for his health and because of that and just acknowledging his fears, giving him a hug is enough most of the time.

You must have suffered so much with that bleeding episode and not telling anybody! I think not telling your DH about the sertraline is not something that is helpful in a marriage, you deserve to feel supported and understood even if your other half doesn't have the same experience. Keeping everything to yourself makes it so much bigger and I bet it makes you feel very lonely.
I really hope your husband is open to listening to your struggles without judgement cause, really, What else is s marriage for if not that?

Feel free to DM me if you want to talk more about this (i hope it works though, dm's don't always seem to come through on the app)

You deserve to feel better and it is not your fault! The best advice I got from my therapist was " You have struggled your entire life to adapt to the world around you, now it's time to change your circumstances so that they can fit your needs so that you can finally feel happy and relaxed" we are not here to just merely survive.

Thank you for that answer @OyWithThePoodlesAlready84, you are absolutely spot on in everything you say. Unfortunately my dh just doesn't seem to have the capacity to see when im struggling and if I talk to him he judt says "you need to talk to someone", when all i really need is a hug and for him to say " you'll be okay". Ive told him this, I need a hug quite frequently and he never hugs me unless ask. I do feel lonely and I have done for years. Ive explained this to him and he never remembers. He just seems to be a person who never needs emotional support and he doesn't recognise this in others. Whereas I can see it in someone straight away. I guess we are all different. We do get on well otherwise. But i do feel increasingly lonely and after nearly 35 years I dont know what to do about it. After my episode with the setraline, I started taking citalopram and I told him straight away. All he said was "be careful ". He didn't ask why I needed them. And he never asked once if they were helping me. Not a word. After about 6 month's I came off them and didn't bother to tell him as I felt he had no interest anyway.
Im glad your husband is more in tune with your feelings. I didn't realise how bad dh was until this thread really, I try to squash the hurt feelings as I dont know what to do about them. Ive realised being with him so long is a big factor in my shaky mental health.
Thank you for the rest of your post, I think you are right in everything you say.

I cant dm as I'm on my phone, but happy to chat here. I hope I haven't distracted you from your thread too much but I really appreciate your advice.

That's ok, we are sharing experiences on here and yours are just as important as mine!

It sounds like your husband is just - as you say- incapable of tuning in to these emotions, and while this is hurtful he's not doing it on purpose (I hope!). t's like you said, opposites attract- my DH is the most level headed person I know and in our case this works well for us but it does take work and communication to understand each other and respect the fact that we are completely different.
It is not my husbands job to fix my anxiety disorder but as it's a part of me he has to deal with it and support me while I try to figure out how to navigate the challenges that come with it. Anxiety disorder is very hard to grasp for non anxious people which your DH seems to recognize by saying 'talk to someone' . This doesn't have to be a therapist, maybe a close family member or a friend? Or random Mumsnetters 😉.

Can you get back into therapy? I think the fear of cancer is a very common one and most people probably have this fear, the difference is that for us it we can't allow ourselves to just think " Oh well, it probably wont happen to me" and our brain just automatically goes to worst case scenario. The irony is that by letting health anxiety rule our lives we are not actually living it. So we have to train our systems to take another route instead of catastrophizing. I found an instagram account of a doctor that explains this really well.
Docmartingp

I never got on with SSRIs but my current psychiatrist has prescribed pregabalin which has been very effective. I am diagnosed autistic. I do still ruminate unfortunately but not as much as pre meds. They've helped hugely with health anxiety and catastrophising, and I feel much calmer in general.

He definitely doesn't mean it @OyWithThePoodlesAlready84, he's not got a bad bone in his body. Its just the way hes wired. It does hurt me and sometimes I struggle to remember he doesn't mean it. I know he wants me to get better for me.
I'm starting the CBT soon.

I don't know, it all feelsl like a minefield with no clear direction.

Thank you for sharing, i will look up the medication you mentioned and keep it in mind as an option if SSRIs don't work out. So glad to hear that medication can work and really looking forward to having my life not ruled by constant anxiety

Good luck with finding something that works for you @OyWithThePoodlesAlready84.

And thanks for the advice 🙏 👍 ☺️