What does OCD look like for you?

[fridayyay4]

I’ve suffered with anxiety for a long time, but only recently realised it’s actually OCD. I thought OCD was hand washing and a spotless home. I thought it all revolved around germs and tidiness.

It’s only recently when I’ve been searching for help for my own obsessions that I’ve realised I have OCD. My compulsions are checking, checking, checking and checking again.

My obsessions and intrusive thoughts have been varied. But I’ve always thought they sound so insane, I’ve never been able to tell anyone. Not even in therapy, as I didn’t understand them and I thought I would be seen as insane.

I’ve had obsessive thoughts about getting pregnant from toilet seats. About having HIV or AIDs. About getting in financial or legal trouble due to something I haven’t realised I’ve done. About doing something wrong while driving somehow without knowing.

The obsessions have made me ill, sometimes have kept me up all night Googling for reassurance for hours and hours. Speaking to customer service teams around the world to make sure I don’t owe them money for something I don’t realise I’ve done. Check, check, checking. But the relief only lasts a couple of seconds before the cycle repeats.

I am thinking of joining up to some OCD support groups, as now i feel at least I know what this is. I actually feel a bit better knowing others have this too and I’m not crazy!

I have all that you describe plus the cleanliness and germs thing.

Covid of course was a double edged sword!

My home is very, very tidy and clean.

The checking is exhausting and I hide it from most people which means I have to avoid some situations and opportunities for social contact.

I have had therapy of varying types and take medication.

Nothing really helps so I just do the best I can to live my life around it.

Living alone makes it easier to cope with because I don’t have someone else finding my behaviours restricting and complaining.

The worst thing has been having to stop driving because I realised my compulsive checking was making me a danger.

It's a horrible condition. My DD has OCD & ASD.
She has good and bad spells and stress can easily tip her into spiralling and catastrophising.
She's had support for it which is helpful. Doesn't stop it happening but helps her recognise when it's an intrusive thoughts.
Learning to recognise them, resist acting on the thought and waiting for it to pass - is frustrating - but can work. It's a 'normal' thought process for most people, but some people are more susceptible to seeing the patterns and reacting to the thought. But it was a liberating moment for my DD to understand that thoughts are sometimes just thoughts and you can let them go (and nothing bad happens) and you can change your thoughts and thus your feelings, but it's your actions that determine who you are, not your thoughts. She ruminates on taboo things sometimes and as a child this made her feel shame which was debilitating. She's still dealing with the thoughts but is in a better place.

Extreme driving anxiety to the extent thst I've stopped.

Is that ambulance for some one I've knocked over?
Did I go through a red light?
Was that a bump.in the road or a body?

I csnt ignore the possibility

My DD has declined to learn as she's worried about this Tbh.

Sorry, I'm posting on a months-old thread. I've posted on the OCD support thread on & off, and had my own thread also back in March.
I've been struggling with a terrible flare-up the last few days, and I've got, I think, a more unusual form of OCD (though I'm not sure) so I thought it'd be interesting to see if anyone relates...
I didn't know there was a name for my sub-type; but I recently discovered it's called Emotional Contamination OCD. So basically, if I get distressing intrusive thoughts, words, phrases, images; or if someone says something that upsets me, or I read something upsetting or anything like that, I feel contaminated and have to wash off the thoughts etc. I also often feel my clothes and environment have become contaminated. I wash clothes very frequently, and really struggle if I can't for whatever reason.
I also have to make sure my thoughts are good when walking through doors or transitioning from one thing to another in any way, such as New Years Eve. I have to re-trace my steps if I've had the wrong thoughts, and feel considerable distress if I can't for any reason.
I have a lot of mental compulsions too - going over my thoughts etc; repeating good phrases in my mind to counter anything troublesome, often a certain number of times before I feel OK.
Physical tidiness & order aren't really a feature of my OCD at all, and it's a very inaccurate stereotype. In fact I'm usually less tidy during a flare-up, as I'm so busy with my compulsions.
It's very time-consuming and I'm sad & utterly exhausted 😔

Just looking for posts re OCD as my adult DS is going through a bad time with it atm. He’s starting therapy and has agreed to try SSRIs.

His thoughts/compulsions are taking over his brain, it’s very heartbreaking to see as a mum and I’m trying to support him as much as I can. It takes its toll on me too esp as I’m an anxious person.

Order etc is not part of his presentation- it’s all rumination and reassurance seeking about any number of things.

The first time in days he’s sitting down doing a job application - he needs something else in his brain that isn’t OCD or he will go ‘insane’ as he puts it.