Work issues - but how much is my mental health?

[Thedaffodilshelp]

I don't really know if this is for a work topic or here. I've had a rough few months - my marriage has broken down and I'm feeling broken too. Work has always given me a lot in terms of my self-worth, but I'm now in a role which isn't really a good fit. I do keep trying to volunteer to take on tasks that match my abilities - and they don't take me up on it. I feel like crying in the office every day at the moment. I know that's not good. I probably need antidepressants - but I don't know how to constuctively talk to my bosses without sounded like an annoying useless whiner. I'll keep my eye out for other opportunities, but I'm not in a great place for selling myself.

Is it a new role in a new company or a new role within your existing organisation?

It’s a role I’ve had for a while, but things in the organisation have changed that affect what I need to do. It’s definitely not the ideal job now, and I’m definitely struggling with Life in general. But I feel like I need to say something about my job issues to my boss - just don’t want to come across badly.

Are you involved in things outside of work? I've had work issues before spoke to a coach they suggested to take the attitude I'll get paid/won't be fired if I do a certain amount of work. But look outside work for fulfillment - volunteer in a club or get stuck into a hobby. Use your.
I'm still not happy with my job but this helps be draw boundaries, ignore stuff, instead of getting annoyed or frustrated with colleagues almost fell sorry for them that they so into work
Hope you feeling better soon, so think would need to be in better place and build confidence prior to looking for new job. But a club or hobby could help everything in short time frame

With everything else going on in your life it seems like you are looking to work for fulfilment and this may not be the solution right now. Could it be that your bosses know you are struggling personally and are worried about overloading you? I echo PP that suggested look for things outside work to build confidence and then tackle the work situation.

This is great advice and I can relate too.
My job is relentless and monotonous.
I volunteer (homeless hub) and feel more valued /needed and appreciated there !

Sorry about the marriage break down.

Are you actually fulfilling and doing your current job? I'd be worried you aren't and wanting to take on these voluntary things as a replacement. Do you feel like crying outside of work too? If the job has changed and not the right fit, I'd start looking elsewhere.

I also agree with taking up a hobby, fitness group or volunteer your time somewhere to help others.

I appreciate all the suggestions - they all make a lot of sense. I’m trying to make the effort to spend time on hobbies and seeing friends, but I’m not sleeping well and I’m exhausted. I don’t know if antidepressants are the answer, just to stop the worst of it.

When was your last health check up? Any thyroid issues, anaemia, peri etc which might also explain some of your symptoms?

Hi OP,

On the anti-depressants if you are struggling with feeling low and tearful a lot of the time I think it might be worth looking at. You've gone through quite a lot personally and so it's fair enough to struggle. I would definitely suggest speaking to a GP.

With work have you had much time off recently? Maybe it's worth having a week off if you have the leave even just to read books, get out in the garden (or whatever works for you) and relax.

If you are getting to the stage of wanting to cry every day, I would take some leave or ask about being signed off for a couple of weeks when you have your GP appointment. Then maybe when you come back you'll be in a better frame of mind to discuss the role changes. I would be nervous if you speak about them now you might end up crying (which is what I would do). Giving yourself some breathing room is so important.

With sleep some people find melatonin helpful so you could try that. I would also suggest getting into really good sleep hygiene:
-no caffeine or alcohol in the afternoon onwards
-trying to wind down away from screens and blue light
-if you can't sleep get up and do something monotonous like folding laundry before going back to bed
-try a nighttime breathing wind down or meditation
-having a bath/shower before bed (get some Epsom salts for the bath)
-gentle lighting

For me I love putting on a comforting audiobook to listen to when I can't sleep (my go to is Harry Potter) you can always just YouTube. I'm not sure it's great sleep hygiene as I end up listening for ages but something soothing like a childhood book can help you to relax.

x🌷

You could try antidepressants, maybe Prozac and maybe some therapy too.

Also the gut-brain connection is huge. So I really recommend getting yourself some kefir yogurt / kombucha!

You can even get into making your own if you are that way inclined...!