TW twenty plus years of depression

[catshatsandchats]

I've had depression for over twenty years, on and off. Most recent bout so far has been about five years and nothing is really helping. I've tried many antidepressants over the years, most recently sertraline and duloxetine, neither made much difference. I've asked my GP to refer me to the mental health service which she is doing, although they're reluctant as they say I'm managing ok (ie I'm not actively slitting my wrists!) She's written to them again as she would rather I be seen by them.

I just don't know what to expect from them. I'm awaiting an ADHD assessment but the waiting list is over 3 years. The initial questionnaire said ADHD and possible autism. I'm 100% sure about the ADHD.

I'm tired of taking different meds with the various side effects, putting on weight, lack of libido etc. I found Wellbutrin mentioned online as suitable for treating depression and ADHD but a side effect is losing hair .. my mum has barely any hair left and I'm terrified of that happening to me. I know it all seems trivial, but I know how much it would get me down, likewise gaining more weight.

I don't know if I'll be able to disagree with what they prescribe or if I would be able to suggest something.

Anyone been in this situation and can give me some advice?

I can't advise I'm afraid, but I'd just like to offer a bit of support.

I've also had depression on and off for a long time, starting with PND after the birth of my last child who's now in his late 20s. I've been medicated since then, I'm on Seroxat which works well for me and I function reasonably 'normally' on it, but it isn't prescribed much these days. I'm also absolutely certain that I have ADHD (and possibly autism) which is undiagnosed but I hadn't a clue until a year or so ago when things finally started falling into place because I work with a lot of neurodivergent people and I fit right in and see myself in many of them. I'm over 60 so I don't know if I'll bother with a diagnosis at this stage, tbh, but I'm considering it to help me make sense of myself.

So I can't really advise but I just wanted to say I hear you and I get it. I hope you get the support you need.

https://neurolaunch.com/tms-therapy-nhs/

I'm in a similar position of 25-30 years with depression and unimpressive results and unpleasant side effects from medications. I don't know if it's available in your area (I don't live in the UK), but I've found some benefit from TMS therapy. I've been able to go about 2 years between rounds of TMS since 2019. Ultimately, though, I've had to come to terms with a realization that I am unlikely to ever be 'cured' and that I will have to manage depressive symptoms for the rest of my life.

Thank you. I've not heard of that so will look into it.