How did you know you had ADHD?

[DontTellMeToTakeInIroning]

So I've been diagnosed over my lifetime with dysthymia, depression and anxiety, plus stopped the autism assessment pathway halfway through but was told by a psychiatrist that they are sure I meet the criteria (it would make A LOT of sense). I'm now wondering if in fact I have ADHD and autism but some of the criteria don't apply at all...

I'm not scatter-brained, I'm hyper-organised, I never lose things, am never late, never struggle with time blindness. I can sit still for loooong periods of time (WFH at a laptop) and have sensory issues around needing peace and quiet. I suppose I should add I'm taking Trazodone and Propranolol which both have a calming effect on the nervous system.

BUT my entire life I have felt that my brain is going 100 miles and hour, I can't switch off no matter how hard I try, and often it's random racing thoughts that pop out of nowhere, like suddenly I'll remember what I got for Christmas in 1995....I'm constantly hypervigilant, have absolutely zero concentration whatsoever, and even at work I need to literally have 20-30 tabs on the go at once and flick between them rather than focus on any particular task. I'm also incredibly impulsive in life, largely around drinking (trying to cut down but I can never just have 'a couple') and spending (in debt to the tune of £63k not including my mortgage)

Things also seem to have gotten worse now that I'm in menopause, but I wouldn't say it was drastically much worse - I had a hysterectomy so sudden onset menopause symptoms.

Would it be worth pursuing an ADHD diagnosis? I know the waiting lists are really long but I wondered if medication might help in my case...

My ds was diagnosed with ADHD in his 30s. Already had dyslexia. Fantastic on time keeping. Pretty organised with his stuff. Loves to set up his room and have everything in it's place. But said he has an unending buzzing in his head with so many thoughts going on. Is terrible with money , so impulsive..just loves to shop. He takes up new hobbies, buys the best gear and then it fizzled out. Also he gave up alcohol at 21 as it was all or nothing . That is the best thing he ever did. He does find taking meds for ADHD has really helped . I would say its worth looking into. He had to go private but you may be in a different situation.

Oh wow some of that sounds a lot like me - definitely the buzzing and the impulsivity, as well as becoming obsessed with new things and dropping them again....

Unfortunately finances won't allow a private diagnosis so I'd have to just wait as long as it takes

My husband who is 60 was seeing a bereavement counsellor after his younger brother died suddenly. Within 5 minutes of talking to him the counsellor said she was sending him a questionnaire to complete. We thought it was to do with his bereavement but the title mentioned adhd. That’s weird we thought. Until he completed it . OMG . It’s like he was the poster boy for ADHD. Suddenly it made sense to him. The fact that he’d struggled all his life and now he realised no he’s not shit at life he had ADHD. It would have been so much easier if he’d been diagnosed as a child but we are where we are and hopefully he can get the help to make his life easier. That counsellor was amazing to spot something within 5 minutes of first speaking to him.

Well I knew I basically couldn't really function in the world but that never had a name (symptoms were just perceived as underachieving/lazy/useless/flaky/immature/messy/selfish etc). I was in an eternal battle to just work harder and be less useless. If everyone else could do it I MUST be able to do it. I felt deep shame about how difficult/impossible most of my life was - how I literally couldn't force myself to do something like cook a meal or change the sheets or answer an email, and would panic every day instead of being able to do any number of small straightforward things.

I found an adult women's ADHD forum and was completely shocked because it was like I was reading about myself. I had no idea that there were other people who struggled like me. I had no idea that it wasn't just a personality flaw and that help was available. Treatment changed my life.

@hazelnutvanillalatte what treatment are you having? Your post really resonated with me @DontTellMeToTakeInIroning
how are you doing?

@hashtaghooray methylphenidate

Aww yano what, I spent my entire life knowing there wasn't somthing quite right with me, I just thought there was somthing really wrong with me

Then I had my DS and when he was around 5 his teacher mentioned that he displayed a lot of ADHD symptoms

I started reading up about it and was flabbergasted to find I was reading about myself and my son.

That conversation led to me being diagnosed eith adhd, then a year later being diagnosed with autism. My DD was diagnosed with autism and adhd 3 months after me.

What made me realise I was autistic is how badly the adhd meds affected me, once a lot of the adhd symptons "went away" it turned out the adhd was just heavily masking autism ( quite common )

I was absolutely baffled at first, I had no idea why noises/ textures/ lights that used to annoy me, ended up making me want to tear my face off. Why socialising was suddenly so painful and exhausting and I had no idea what to say to people anymore..... it's coz my adhd heavily masked some awful autistic symptons

My DS has recently been diagnosed with dyspraxia and SPD / hypermobile and I think he has elhos danlos syndrome

I have a lot of similar symptoms to DS in regards to balance / skin that scars easily / elastic stretchy skin ect

He's only 9 but it's crazy how having him, has led to me learning so much about all of us

Definitely worth pursuing a diagnosis. I went to my GP last summer after various episodes during my life of what I now realise was burnout but was diagnosed and treated as depression/ anxiety, plus awful post partum anxiety 8 years ago and I'm still taking the anti depressants but trying to slowly wean off them. Having an autistic daughter who is also on the ADHD assessment pathway had made me realise there might be more to my struggles and the feeling that I'd always been different/ not able to function well as a proper grown up! The GP was lovely and referred me through Right to Choose and I got both autism and ADHD diagnoses before Christmas. I am not currently going down the medication route, I want to get off the ADs first and see how I go, but it really helps me knowing why I find certain things hard and that my brain works in a particular way. It's funny having both, as a PP said they almost compensate for each other at times, and at other times I feel like a walking contradiction!! Best of luck 💐

Other people told me.

It was actually a MN thread which made me look up the description and it described every single issue I've ever had in my life listed in a handy list

I have the inattentive type and mine is all the disorganisation, epic time blindness, inability to self-motivate or stick to/form habits etc. But I don't tend to have the impulse-seeking hyperactivity. Maybe you have the more hyperactive subtype?

See I don't recognise any hyperactivity in myself outwardly, just inside my brain. But when I was a child I was absolutely hyperactive. I do wonder if I've learned over the years to tone it down - I had a long-term abusive relationship which literally killed off any presence/'sparkle' I had so maybe that was it...

That is typical of ADHD - it's probably why they used to think it was a childhood thing that people grow out of. You don't see many adults who are physically hyperactive in the same way that children with ADHD tend to be. ADHD hyperactivity in adulthood is either internal, or looks like cramming your diary with 100 different commitments and never being still.

Hyperactivity can present as pacing, fidgeting, nail biting, racing thoughts, foot tapping, etc. I didn't recognise myself as hyperactive until I realised you don't have to be running around bouncing off the walls, and in fact that is not the most common presentation.