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Original poster

would I be mad to even consider buying prozac online and taking it?

21 replies

goingslowlymad · 16/06/2008 11:51

I had twins three months ago and since then I have been snappy, agressive, anxious and quite frankly bordering on mad.

I have been unjustly harsh with my children, particularly the 7 year old and blow every tiny thing out of proportion. For example if the house doesn't stay clean and tidy it sends me over the edge and I lose control. And yesterday I got the dog and my 18 month old ready to go out for a walk and as we stepped out the door it started raining which resulted in me losing my temper, throwing the dog lead down and not going.

I don't want to and won't see my GP about this. There is no way I want 'DEPRESSION' flagged up on my medical notes. No way on earth. I would rather suffer than do that.

So I thought if I buy a low-dose AD off the internet, making sure they come from a reliable source obviously, then I could get better without it being on all my medical notes.

I certainly feel I need something to help me day-to-day. It's not fair on my family to be making them suffer because my mind doesn't cope well with giving birth. So what do you think? Buy the ADs, or stick it out and hope I feel better on my own soon?

OP posts:
Flamesparrow · 16/06/2008 11:52

No.

Option3 - GO TO DOCTOR.

How is taking possibly lethal medication online, or suffering without any good for your family??

EffiePerine · 16/06/2008 11:53

YES. All ADs have serious side-effects which need to be monitored by a professional.

Please go and see your GP. They won't label you, there may be other ways to help other than medication.

Enid · 16/06/2008 11:53

You are mad, yes.

You should go and see your gp. But also accept that a 7 year old an 18 month old and 3 month old twins is HARD and I think would leave all of us teetering on the brink...

EffiePerine · 16/06/2008 11:53

yes, you would be mad to consider it that is...

Flamesparrow · 16/06/2008 11:53

Mine was a no don't do it, not no it wouldn't be mad

laidbackinengland · 16/06/2008 11:56

Have you thought about contacting 'Home Start' for some help, or your local FE college to see if a student nanny could come and work with your family 2 days a week (for free) ? It sounds like you could do with a helping hand at the moment.

crokky · 16/06/2008 11:56

You have 4 kids and a dog - I doubt you are mad, you are just under a huge amount of pressure.

Anyway DO NOT buy any drugs off the internet. That would be extremely dangerous. I can understand you don't want depression on your notes, so if I were you I would try and get some help round the house/with DC to try and lighten your load.

TheTeaspoonLady · 16/06/2008 11:58

Go and seek medical advice.

You have a lot on your plate.
You sound depressed.

There is no stigma to being diagnosed with depression.

You need to speak to a doctor.

The fact that you are considering buying illegal drugs online , and self-medicating, rather than talking to your doctor about how you feel, suggests that perhaps you need to see a different GP.

poshtottie · 16/06/2008 12:03

I wouldn't buy medication from the internet. It sounds like you have a lot going on and I would get some help. Looking back I was the same and I only have one child! I didn't go to see my gp for exactly the same reasons as you but in hindsight I probably should have. Its probably more common than we think.

Enid · 16/06/2008 12:04

they probably dont work anyway

if you want to help yourself, take st johns wort, make sure you have plenty of help and support with the kids, get some gentle excercise (even in the rain!)

but seriously I would go and see your gp, he will have heard it all before

Original poster
goingslowlymad · 16/06/2008 12:08

Without going into too much detail as I don't want to be recognised by anyone IRL, the twins were surrogate babies for childless friends so don't actually live here with me. I have children of my own though. The dog is a new addition. We got him three weeks ago. For some extraordinaryly bizarre reason I thought a dog might help me feel better Now that's madness lol.

I feel so happy about the twins. My friend is over the moon and it's one of the best things I have ever done. I don't 'miss' the babies, I have never felt like their mother and Lord knows I don't want a baby myself right now so I just don't understand why I feel so crazy.

No-one except my husband knows how I feel. He was initially very againt self medicating but can see how desperate I feel.

OP posts:
Threadwormm · 16/06/2008 12:09

Why don't you want 'Depression' flagged up on your medical notes? It's not a crime, you know.

Enid · 16/06/2008 12:11

You sound like you could do with a bit of counselling tbh

you must goand see your gp

my dh would encourage me to go and I think your dh should do the same

naswm · 16/06/2008 12:12

Dont be so silly and proud. These drugs needs to be prescribed by a qualified doctor and not someone looking to make money over the internet. Having 'Depression flagged on your medical notes' is as common as high blood pressure. Relieve yourself of one less worry and go to the doctor.

Original poster
goingslowlymad · 16/06/2008 12:13

Threadwormm I just feel like I will be juged somehow. I'd hate for people to think I'm not in control of my life. I suppose I kind of think 'pull yourself together woman!'.

OP posts:
naswm · 16/06/2008 12:15

That is just a symptom goingslowlymad - we've all been there, well, I have - but go to the docs. It's the safest option

Enid · 16/06/2008 12:17

yy

but it is such a relief to admit that you can't do it all

you may even blub (hard to admit for a staunch coper but v therapeutic)

Threadwormm · 16/06/2008 12:17

Sorry, my post sounded harsh. It's just that it is unfair on yourself and on depression sufferers generally to think of 'depression' on your notes as any more damning that 'diabetes' on your notes.

And it would be very bad just to buy prozac online. You need medical support with ADs. They won't work for everyone -- and there are lots of different ADs, so that prozac might not be the best to try.

Sidge · 16/06/2008 12:22

Please don't buy pills online.

Your GP won't tar and feather you and make you walk the streets naked with "Depressed Woman" tattooed on your chest. S/he can give you advice, support, refer you on if needed and prescribe medication if appropriate.

Having a record of reactive depression on your notes won't impact on much at all. But the outcome of any appropriate and supervised treatment will be much more helpful.

Be kind to yourself

littlewoman · 16/06/2008 12:22

Do you know how much of a relief it is for someone to say that you are quite justified in not being able to cope, because you have too much on your plate? It is a huge relief for the doctor to say to you 'poor you, you need some help'. Saying things like 'pull yourself together woman' is not being kind to yourself. You need help as much as the next person. Don't be too proud to accept it. It's not only you that's suffering, your children are too, and probably dh. That's not fair on any of you. Let go of the reigns for a while and accept you are not superwoman. The world will not fall apart when you admit you are not invincible. Nothing will change much at all, except that you will get the help you need.

Boco · 16/06/2008 12:27

Being a surrogate mother is an amazing thing to have done. But even if logically you feel alright about it, you've been through a huge thing, physically and emotionally. It doesn't make you weak, who on earth could go through this without being knocked sideways by it? You don't have to be a superwoman, it's normal to feel this way, you just need a bit of help to get through it. I think it's sad you feel concerned about it being on your notes, that isn't something that you should even think about.

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