Stress

[tamzin87]

I really need some advice as I feel my stress levels are out of control and I’m worried.

I have a lot going on at the moment, I’m starting a new job soon which I’m excited about, I desperately need to move house as my neighbours are making my life hell and every time a potential house comes up we are messed around, my elderly parents are both needing more care and not getting on at all, I have tried everything to help them but they just put blocks in the way of almost everything I suggest and don’t help themselves, my siblings don’t do much to assist in this either, and on top of this I have health anxiety.

I really don't know which way to turn at the moment. I feel like I must have been a terrible person in a previous life as nothing seems to be working out for me.

I’m just coming here for suggestions, advice and to see if anyone else has gone through anything similar and managed to see a way out of it.

You drop the things you can’t do anything about, primarily your parents. They are adults and can make their own choices for now. Focus on the new job and the things you can do. Stress isn’t an entity in itself, it’s our emotional reaction to situations so once you take control your stress will abate.

First, exercise. That is one of the best ways to help with stress.

Second, while you're waiting to move, is there something you can do about your neighbors? You don't mention what the problem is, but is it possible you could check with other neighbors and band together to address the problem?

Third, although you also don't mention what the exact issue is with your parents, or if they are in a position to make requests themselves, can you have a serious sit-down with your siblings? Can you talk with them about making some serious apportioning of time and responsibilities? If they say they're too busy or two far away, can you get them agree to make a financial contribution to hire help? Are your parents in a position to make firm requests to divide up the help more equitably? What suggestions are you making that your parents block - and can your suggestions be bolstered by a doctor?

But, first, exercise.

Good luck.