My care team are shut and I'm in crisis. I keep having urges to hurt my husband. I'm so scared. I've never had urges like this before. I'm hiding away in my bedroom keeping away from everyone while I feel like this.
I know what to do if the urges get too much, I'm to call 111 option 2 again so don't worry about my safety. I just need to talk and keep distracted while I wait.
I keep thinking my husband is poisoning my tea and I'm doing very triggering trauma therapy right now. So it's no wonder it's all reached crisis point.
Life feels fake like it's all one big simulation and if I die ill be free. It also means since everything is fake there's no real consequences to my actions. My brains moving to fast I can't hold onto any thoughts.